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“Some People Are Just Dying To Live With The Virus!”

“Good afternoon, we have a spokesperson for the PM, Ms, Hope Leeder to explain the government’s new position on lockdowns. Good afternoon, Ms Leeder.”

“Miss. It’s Miss Leeder. I’m not a feminist.”

“Sorry, I was just…”

“And let me make it clear the government does not have a new position. The government’s position has always been that we need to open up immediately.”

“So you’re saying that there’s no change and the government is committed to opening up as soon as it’s safe.”

“No, I’m saying that Mr Morrison has been very clear that he wants these silly lockdowns to stop. Last year he told us to stop hiding under the doona even before we had a vaccine and now he’s saying that we can’t stay in the cave, so you can’t accuse him of being inconsistent.”

“But didn’t he say that sometimes a short, sharp lockdown was the only way to handle things?”

“I think you’re taking that out of context.”

“What was the context then?”

“He was talking about Parliament not the economy.”

“So he doesn’t support lockdowns until the vaccination rates get to 80%?”

“Of course he does. He just re-affirmed his commitment to Doherty modelling.”

“But didn’t he say in Parliament that the Doherty modelling had been updated?

“Yes, but that was confidential Cabinet information and you’ll have to trust his reassurance.”

“Let me try to understand clearly, we’re using modelling that can’t be made public to tell the public that they should trust the modelling?”

“The PM was very clear. There is an agreement with the Australian people that we’d follow the Doherty model so any going back on that would be breaking a promise and, while Premiers may break promises all the time, Mr Morrison is very careful never to make them.”

“I’m not sure that’s true.”

“Which bit?”

“Any of it, but just to be completely clear: the PM wants the states to guarantee there’ll be no lockdowns once the vaccination rate reaches 80%?”

“Or 70%. He was very clear that he doesn’t mind if it’s lower.”

“Is that 70% in total, including children or 70% of the eligible population?”

“I think it was 70% of the Federal LNP, but I’ll have to take that on notice.”

“What sort of death rates are the government prepared to accept?”

“None. Our policy is that we need to learn to live with Covid and people who are dying are clearly not adhering to our policy.”

“Nobody chooses to die.”

“Are you sure? We’ve been pushing the lockdown causes suicides angle pretty hard…”

“I meant that people dying from Covid don’t choose it.”

“We could debate this all day but the government policy is that we live with Covid and if they’re not doing that, we can’t be held responsible if they don’t follow our policy any more than we can be held responsible for those who chose to be contractors in Afghanistan rather than working directly for the Australian government.”

“On that, would you agree that the evacuation of Afghanistan could have been done better in hindsight?”

“Well, nobody can be expected to have hindsight about the past, but I think it’s worked exactly as we wanted it to. I mean, we can drag Peter Dutton out to tell everyone that those left behind were really possible terrorists and we can remind everyone about our strong border policies and people will stop talking about Covid.”

“Getting back to lockdown situation…”

“In Afghanistan?”

“No, in Australia.”

“I’d much rather talk about overseas…”

“The PM today made a speech about embracing the virus. Isn’t that the opposite of the health advice?”

“Sorry?”

“And he also said that it’s darkest before dawn. Is that actually true? I mean don’t you get slivers of light before dawn?””

“I don’t understand.”

“The Prime Minister was telling us that dawn wasn’t far away and that we were working toward the dawn. What did he mean?”

“Well he was trying to inspire the people…”

“And then he said that we were ‘hastening’ toward it. I mean who using a word like that? Hastening? We’re working towards it and we’re hastening towards it. Next we’ll be about to fight it on the beaches or we’ll be asked to understand that there’s nothing to fear but fear itself.”

“What’s your question?”

“I don’t have one. I just realised that this whole thing is some sort of demented word game and I should stop trying to ask sensible questions.”

“Well, there’s no point in continuing the interview!”

“Yes, Miss Leeder, on that we can agree.”

 

* * *

In breaking news, Matt Canavan has clarified that he doesn’t mind if The Wiggles choose to have a racially diverse line-up with female members. Just as they have no right to pick the Nationals front bench, he has no right to dictate their line-up and if they want to have people who’d have no chance of being preselected for the Nationals, then that’s up to them but he stopped watching them years ago once he realised that mother was never going to take him to a concert because he was over thirty.

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15 comments

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  1. Josephus

    For years people fleeing afghan minority groups were locked up in revolting conditions for years on end as their applications were deliberately slowed. A few made it here. Some women are coming here soon specially those educated by us it seems. Now that some are to be let for differing reasons will they be allowed to work and access Medicare? And must they leave parents behind? If the former work and access Medicare they can help pay for their parents? None of this seems clear. Miss Leeder needs to ask about all that.

  2. Kerri

    I’m wondering who is running the country now?
    Scotty or Gladys? 🤷🏼‍♀️

  3. BB

    Neither.
    Murdoch ☠️ is running the country.
    ruining the country is more to the point.

  4. Fred

    If the government is hell bent on f…ing us over by abandoning lock-downs, then as part of the foreplay they should as a minimum provide a detailed roadmap that ensures:
    1) We truly have 80% full vaccination minimum in each LGA country-wide (i.e. no clumping where towns are 85% and isolated communities are 0%) before “opening up” aka freedom day.
    2) The government publishes a figure of what it considers to be an acceptable 7 day moving average death rate and a commitment that they will automatically invoke a 4+ week minimum “Victorian style” proper lock-down when the number is exceeded.
    3) If the published death rate is exceeded more that twice in 6 months the entire cabinet commits to not standing at the next election and the PM calls an election at the earliest date possible.

    Maybe then I’ll get into bed with them.

  5. Trevor

    Morri$CUM and his moveable feast of illucid language.
    Mr Announcement is still at it making word salad miracles out of lies statistics and more lies.
    What a way to run Australia, dependant upon the collatoral damage remaining from the war of the imbiciles between Potato head Dutton and miracle happy clapper in chief MorriSCUM.
    Caveman Canavan reappears from under the rock he crawls out from to utter more mindless drivel.
    Nev Powers and his handpicked gas executives are still in charge of Australia’s post Covid economic miracle fracking grandma and grandpa.
    What a load a scumsucking reprobates make up the LNP Masquerading as the Australian Govt.
    poor fella my country.

  6. New England Cocky

    Aw shucks Rossleigh … so much laughing before my first morning coffee sets me up for the day.

    The sad reality is that:
    .
    1) The Doherty Model is wrong because the basic assumptions are now incorrect and so without lockdowns COVID infections will escalate to the stars;
    .
    2) Conveniently ignoring people under age 19 years reduces the Australian population thus making the achievement APPEAR TO OCCUR SOONER when in fact current COVID infection statistics show that 204/800+ kids under age 9 years were diagnosed over 21-22 August 2021 and 276/800+ persons aged 10-19 years contracted COVID in the same period (SMH 240821 p1);
    .
    3) The sad overseas news this morning (240821) is that many American anti-vaxxers have become infected, and upon their death beds realise “Well shit!! That didn’t work!!”. Do we want the same disastrous loss of life that a lone Prim Monster decision to send Australian troops into Iraq & Afghanistan without consulting Parliament has created?

    4) Scummo is the most practised Australian at hiding under the bed (with that nice Mr Menzies’ communists) or under the doona or indeed anywhere away from pubic scrutiny of his lack of compassion for former comrades of the Australian military operating in Afghanistan (just another example of his unChristian principles);
    .
    I am reliably advised that Scummo has NOT been taking lessons in confused unthinking or English mispronunciation from Barnyard Beetrooter in the wilds of New England because of concerns about the dangers of Drop Bears and Lesser Known Bunyips when you cross the Hawkesbury River bridge.
    .
    However, there are rumours here that thanks to the successful Taliban campaign to recover their country from the imperialist Americans, the Canberra bubble is considering following their example and returning to the foundations of Christianity to subjugate women now that the facemask is mandatory and the Hell$inger$ Cult practice of keeping women barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen

    But is it true that the Canberra Bubble is considering following the Taliban model of chasing out American imperialists taking Australian natural resources without paying any Australian taxation, continuing the mandatory wearing of facemasks because for women they function as a hijab and making the speaking in tongues a mandatory school subject so that future generations will be able to translate the incoherent mumblings of current Australian misleaders?

  7. BB

    Ending restrictions with 80% vaccinated could cause 25,000 Australian deaths, and 270,000 cases of long Covid. https://www.theguardian.com/world/2021/aug/24/ending-lockdowns-with-80-vaccinated-could-cause-25000-australian-deaths-new-modelling-suggests

    “Hyde and co-authors Prof Quentin Grafton of the Australian National University and Prof Tom Kompas of the University of Melbourne, both economists, called for a 90% vaccination rate among all Australians, including children, and a 95% rate for vulnerable populations, including elderly people and Indigenous Australians.”

    Morrison doesn’t give a rat’s arse if people die, just collateral damage in kowtowing to the corporate & business world of profit. Morrison is only interested in appearing as a saviour, a leader and enhance his prospects at the next Federal elections.

    Morrison is a very worried man as he knows his time as the PM is over, he’s toast, so bullying and threating people, premiers, the states, is his modus operandi, threating to withhold funding, Morrison is a joke, a fraud.

    The sooner he and the L/NP are gone the sooner Australia can start to recover.

  8. skip

    BB

    Investments in Fizzer oops Pfizer lookin golden today

    Speculative fear mongering!!!!

    People now just injection chattel for $PROFIT$???

    COVID booster shots are expected to serve as a key revenue driver in the years to come for Pfizer and Moderna. Pfizer executives have assured investors the company sees the vaccine market evolving as the pandemic wanes, and will likely be able to charge more per dose than it was getting under pandemic supply deals.

    According to Reuters, Pfizer, along with German partner BioNTech, and Moderna have together locked up COVID vaccine supply agreements worth more than $60 billion in sales, just in 2021 and 2022. The agreements include supply of the initial two doses of their vaccines as well as billions of dollars in potential boosters for wealthy nations.

    Analysts forecasted revenue of more than $6.6 billion for Pfizer’s COVID vaccine and $7.6 billion for Moderna in 2023, mostly from booster sales. They eventually see the annual market settling at around $5 billion or higher, with additional drugmakers competing for those sales.

    “Freedom of choice is the essence of all accountability.”
    Frederick Douglass

  9. BB

    @skip..

    OMDog, corporations seeking future profits.

    Who woulda thought…

    So what’s new?

  10. ajogrady

    Cutting and running and giving up and doing nothing is what the L/NP do best. The latest Covid-19 plan and the cruel humanitarian disaster in Afghanistan are both perfect examples of this. The law of the jungle and survival of the fittest is the L/NP modus operandi.

  11. wam

    Thanks, rossleigh, I was unaware of my agreement with scummo about doherty The report is beyond my reading in full but my skim suggests the delta changes are not only too quick for old doherty fuddyduddies but are manifestly far too quick for scummo and gladys. The way these two are floundering in front of the media and staggering forward with vague rhetoric of ‘plans’ are, sadly, in the hope of a miracle. The bottom line for the quack quack is the trickery of using ‘vaccine’ to people who associate the word with immunity of the disease. This is not the case with covid as vaccinated people can catch and spread the disease but the symptons are usually muted with hospitalisation and death being unexpected.

    PS: yes BB this pragmatic government and its supporters are not fazed by collateral damage so deaths at 0.001% hold no fears for them. They will rationalise it will be the poor who die and they are labor. But it is likely that many deaths will be from young children and I doubt if that has been considered by glad, scummo and the melb uni mob.
    As for long covid glad, scummo et al seem to have not even heard of it?

  12. ajogrady

    The L/NP think “Yes Minister” is a training manual for the Australian public service and that “1984” is the L/NP’s blueprint to Australias future.
    Circuses around Australia cannot find clowns as all clowns have joined the Liberal and Nationals all corrupt and lying circus. Also L/NP trapeze artists are saying that they are not responsible or should be made accountable for catching other trapeze artists during the course of performing their act. Head trapeze artist Scovid Morriscum said “its not a race to catch another trapeze artist” and “I dont hold anything that I am accountable or responsible for”.

  13. BB

    Aye Paul walter’

    Morrison can’t handle anyone not going along with his BS narrative, he’s a typical RW negative belligerent dangerous fool. More questionable blatant rorting where the L/NP is handing out public funds to business. Cox Inall declined to comment.

    https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2021/aug/24/morrison-government-is-paying-pr-firm-29m-to-promote-covid-vaccine-rollout

    Yes, wam, why we don’t see more of Albo on TV? Maybe because most of the free to air repeat TV BS is owned by RW forces?

    Morrison & the L/NP believe the cost of a “death or two” amongst the poor is cheaper than paying out austerity benefits.

    Indeed a very pragmatic government. ho ho ho. They will rationalise any cowshit till the cows come home! 👎

  14. wam

    Yes BB, one of my windmills is getting labor to realise that the morning shows thrive on sex(lnp men in every state), violence, tears, waste, rorts and controversy from the left, right or centre. A sense of propriety and fair play with a dash of ‘are we free from…’ or will we get bitten, stops albo for going scummo on ch watched by voters? We know the ABC is far from being labor much less left but they do allow albo to speak and that brands them as anti-government. The fact that the ABC lets the government speak and lie, is lost in the labor mist. But the resulting hatred, of the ABC balanced reporting, by the right wing media and conservative advertisers is not lost on the commercial media who need sex, violence or controversy to over rule the $.

    The ability to accept collateral damage allows us to ask afghan family to send details by post from kabul. What have we become when the yanks have taken thousands including the ‘send us evidence’ family and we are too frightened of losing a vote to have any humanity.

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