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Skiddy leaves his mark

It was Tony Abbott’s ludicrous, bow-legged saunter that encapsulated the man; some wag once remarked that he looked like a cowboy leaving a rodeo portaloo. His gait was an asinine affectation, the purpose of which no doubt was to reinforce his self image of a macho man, a tough guy in red dick-stickers, but instead the ape-like amble simply highlighted the novelty of his adoption of bipedalism.

A dung flinger, a wrecker and mendacious saboteur, an idiot, a practised liar and humbug Abbott was without a doubt Australia’s worst ever Prime Minister. Until now.

Abbott and his trademark I-shat-myself swagger has been superseded by a smirk on a jerk – Scott SkidMark Morrison.

The caps, the thumbs up, the pie-gobbin’, the beer kneckin’ and the stunts; none capture the real Morrison. It’s the supercilious, omni-present smirk that does. Arrogance, smugness, disdain and uninterest all in one self-satisfied facial expression that says “I was elected to rule not to serve”. The smirk is who Skiddy is. Even in the most dire of contexts he struggles to control it but there’s only one thing that will remove it – his inevitable and welcome demise.

Many will see the beginning of the end times for brother Skiddy as being marked by his clandestine abandonment of our burning country to flee to a beach chair on Waikiki. Others may see it as marked by his New Year’s eve partying at Kiribilli House with his dubious pals frolicking in the pool while firies were putting their lives on the line; or maybe it’s his subsequent photo op with cricketers who he saw as more deserving of his presence than those who had lost everything in the flames.

For me, the beginning of his end was Nelligen heroic firey Paul Parker’s spray. This is the start of the death spiral of a dodgy salesman, the smirk removal shovel to the face of a self-serving grifter.



The calamitous bushfires have brought out the best in many people and the worst in others. The worst-of-the-worst is Morrison – a gutless grub who hides from crisis in Hawaii and uses his missus as a human shield. He thinks of the fires as a backdrop to the cricket and describes his presence at a firey’s funeral as “tremendous”. He ran from aggrieved victims who objected to being used for a photo op and the prick’s funded empathy extended to a single bag of Woolies’ groceries for the thousands of displaced fire evacuees.

This is a brazen coward, a liar, a gobshite and a parasite whose only interest is self-interest. What sort of worm, after being humiliated into responding to the crisis then produces a self-congratulatory TV ad praising himself for all those things he for so long refused to do? The chutzpah is staggering.

Morrison the rapturist may believe that the drought and the fires are signs of the Apocolypse but he needs the status of the office of PM and its fat salary to guarantee his seat in the heavenly chariot and a poolside sun lounge in his members only celestial paradise, so he’ll continue to propagandise, politicise and gaslight until summoned by the ethereal choir.

His Tory cronies will sort through the ashes looking for way to make a quick buck. A promised $2 billion recovery fund will have the leeches such as Angus Taylor and Barnaby Joyce drafting their business plans and opening new accounts in the Cayman Islands.

The vandalism of our environment will continue as this regime introduces legislation to crack down on environmental litigation and class actions and cuts “green tape” to let loose the vandals to monetise what’s left of our natural environment. It will continue to demonise protest and dissent, and its goons will continue to threaten 13 year old girls with arrest.

This is no time for politeness, there is no reason to respect Morrison or his office. This is a time for anger and outrage. When Skiddy is eventually extracted from office he will have left his mark – a scorched Australia, smoke-stained glaciers in NZ, Chile and Argentina and a legacy as Australia’a worst PM.

Skiddy, you are unprecedented. You are a wretched, despicable bastard.


Never forget, never forgive (image from : photo credits AAP/Channel 7)


This article was originally published on The Grumpy Geezer.


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  1. Jackie

    I did hear on the grapevine that hero Peter Parker of Nelligen was “disciplined” but I hope thats not true. He was clearly exhausted, and should be given some rest time to recuperate. But he definitely said it for Australia!

  2. Phil Pryor

    As the article suggests, Abbott, and many other of his cloacal colleagues, is a stain on a skidmark on a scraping of excreted anality . We have too much fllthy fundamental foulness in this government, from the pustular head down.

  3. Dave G.

    A stronger denunciation I have never read.

  4. Claudio Pompili

    Oh Grumpy, you are the people’s poet laureate – you don’t mince your words or suffer fools and tell it straight the way we used to before the tsunami of weasel word conmen Howard, Abbott, Turnbull and now Scotty from Marketing. You are what First Dog on the Moon is to satirical cartoons. I doff my hat +3 respect

  5. DrakeN

    You have spoken for me, GG – but there is so much more to be said.

    I think that I may be about to start a log of the deadly consequences of the activities of the UnHoly Trinity of Commerce, Politics and Religions.

    I first have to check up on some archeological papers relating to the Bronze Age to use it as a starting point.

  6. New England Cocky

    Agreed Claudio Pompili!!

    However, GG I must complain that having a pic of Smirkie Morriscum in the middle of the article did lower the tone considerably from your usual high standard of accurate description of our incumbent self-serving egomaniac politicians. There are far too many of those pornographic images polluting our Internet.

    Then be warned that the RSPCA may take serious offence at your besmirching the reputation of dung beetles, crickets and worms by joining them with the same article as the leader of the misgovernment creating the worst third world export economy in the OECD.


  7. Geoff Andrews

    Ah! Satire: so close to the truth it’s not funny. Except is is; very funny.
    This is an old joke from the Bjelke years. Russ Hinze was the protagonist then but Morrison easily fits into the character.

    Morrison enters a doctor’s room. He’s wearing a hat. The doctor is quite offended and asks him to remove the hat. Morrison reluctantly does so, revealing a huge cane toad sitting on his head. The doctor steps back, aghast. He cautiously approaches and examines the toad more closely and, to his amazement, discovers that the toad is actually growing on Morrison’s head.
    “Good lord!'” exclaims the Doctor, “How did this happen?”
    “Dunno, it just started as a pimple on me arse.” replies the toad.

    I warned you it was old but it’s just as appropriate.

  8. Harry Lime

    I could never disagree with your incisive sentiments,always very funny,but the question remains How do we get rid of this egregious shitstain, and how effing soon?

  9. Ross

    Thank you for your posts GG. Nothing better than reading a good rant in the morning before facing the rigors of the day. Have to agree wholeheartedly with your post.
    Morrison has lost a lot of bark from his mishandling of these disastrous bushfires.
    Another two fire seasons till the next election, will Scotty from marketing last the distance before the knife goes in?

  10. Diane Larsen

    I stand with grumpy long may he educate and entertain us if only we could get his words to the people that need to read them that is the politically uneducated, the brainwashed and the apathetic ❤️

  11. T

    Spot on GG. The worst part of it all is we cannot get rid of him now and have to wait another 2 years or so and who knows what he will destroy in that time.

  12. Socrates.

    Yes, “business plans” and avoidance of costs for the rich…socialisation of debt, privatisation of gain.

    And they have the nerve to be thinking about wasting yet more money and the Middle East

  13. Henry Rodrigues

    Paul Parker of Nelligen for Australian of the Year !!!!!!! Honest, forthright, upfront…..

    Up yours Scummo.

  14. Patagonian

    Brilliant work as usual GG – i sing your praises far and wide, and this one will get posted on the Guardian comment site if that’s OK with you.

    I was wondering why Scott From Marketing felt the need to take 6 Riot and Public Order 4WDs to on his visit to Cobargo on 2nd January. After all, he is so loved by his people and he came to offer them comfort and succour. Well not succour so much, seeing as the 6 vehicles he brought with him were devoid of so much as a snack pack of sultanas. But why, seeing as he is so adored, did he need the Hut Hut squad?

    Perhaps this is why:

    On 11th November Torrington NSW lost 17 homes. It barely made the news. Nor did the locals screaming at Barnaby Joyce to do something to help them when he visited afterwards. I was told he couldn’t get away from them fast enough.

  15. Grumpy Geezer

    OK x me Patagonian.


  16. Patagonian

    Thank you!

  17. Brozza

    I suppose I must consider myself extreeeeemly lucky, as I have yet to see the “self-congratulatory TV ad praising himself for all those things he for so long refused to do”
    I really feel for all those poor people who obviously can’t UN-see it.

  18. Kathryn

    Australia LOVES you Paul Parker. You have expressed our feelings of disgust, contempt, loathing and seething RAGE against the WORST, most despised excuse for an inhumane being this side of the (burnt) Black Stump! The unbelievable callous disregard the bible-thumping hypocrite and unspeakably vile sociopath, MorriScum, has for the exhausted and heroic fire fighters, the traumatised victims of the fires (his useless climate-change-denying government helped to create), ordinary Australians and our precious environment and dwindling water resources this fascist rabble in the LNP have vandalised, sold-off and privatised, is so evil, breathtakingly ruthless and indescribably reckless, it beggars description! Personally, I want Morrison to step down or die … don’t really mind which option at this stage! Either way, the nauseating bastard won’t be missed!

  19. Michael Taylor

    He surely has foot-in-mouth disease by now.

  20. Ill fares the land

    I especially like the “born to rule not to serve” line. To my mind that sums up in one sentence what seems to be the attitude that has permeated all of Morrison’s behaviours. In truth, those behaviours were in the ascendancy before the bushfires, because when incompetent, but power-crazed fools are promoted beyond the status their ability warrants, they have this remarkable way of adapting their thinking to rationalise that they got that “promotion”, or won that election, because they were the best person for the job and, well, … just because they are so darn good and loved by those who voted for them. When Morrison had to hurriedly write a new script to deal with the post-Hawaii crisis, his character flaws took over – the real him was on display if you will. We, apparently, wanted him back from Hawaii because we, his people, loved and needed him. After all, he told us so. Funnily enough, I and I suspect many Australians would have forgiven his Hawaii error of judgement if he had just manned up, said he was wrong and moved on. But that’s not how Morrison reacts when he is criticised or challenged. When his feelings were hurt because he was criticised and worse, rejected by people whose hands he was trying to shake in a staged photo-op, he responded as a marketing hack with the EQ of a child would be expected to
    respond by claiming he was doing “big things” in a ridiculous party promotion. He used his wife as a prop. His gross misjudgement in having a big party at Kirribilli (who thinks this stuff up for crying out loud – we know the guy is tone deaf, but really!). His now white-anting of Andrews and Berejiklian. The photos with Fitzsimmons and Berejiklian looking, to my eye anyway, decidedly uncomfortable with Morrison. His desperation to try and rebuild the damaged “brand” led to some appalling misjudgements. Interestingly, Anna Bligh during the Brisbane floods and Gladys Berejiklian (not initially, but certainly in the latter stages of the fire crisis), showed excellent skills in crisis management. They never mention or mentioned their party or what “their government was doing”. They kept the focus on the people in need, not on themselves and were better politicians because they were, even if only for a time, better people (I have zero respect for Anna Bligh in her current role, but there was a point where she did what she had to do with aplomb). But that’s not our boy Scott the Mo – it is all about him. He is an awful politician because, apart from not having any leadership skills at all, he is an awful person. When you get to see the personal brand he has been creating for himself stripped away, you see, amongst other things, his total lack of EQ and his simmering aggression.

  21. Patagonian

    Yes, Gladys had definitely sniffed the air and caught the smell of burning politician so no wonder she’s making a big effort now, It will never make up for her dereliction over the past years of her premiership, but she’ll probably get away with it.

  22. wam

    El conejo is an amoral christian totally devoted to god. Scummo is an immoral christian totally devoted to god. Trump has managed to combine the worst of each.
    Bought an expensive chlorinator for xmas took it back yesterday to be to that it always blocks up. I thought well why the fck did you sell it to me? He went on to say I charge them for 5 visits and a replacement valve but yours look alright now. This prick had me bring in the unit and he puffed into the valve for no more than 25 seconds and I am left wondering how long before my next visit. The rip off has trickled down from the bankd,
    We have gone from a small % of slimes in the pink batts era to the business norm.
    This last 6 years has seen the domination of the pop up. rip off and piss off mentality where only the victims gets the blame and the sanctions. Those who disappear get the profits.
    Everywhere you look low cost shit is sold at exorbitant profits,
    Honesty no longer is valued because it is so easily abused.
    Religious politicians can no longer be trusted because god allows lies if the end point is his glory.
    The only hope is that the craig kelly types will so anger women that a me to in churches will prevail and the religions by men for men will get a big dose of equality.

  23. New England Cocky

    Well said Patagonian. Perhaps her only salvation is the formation of a Seventh State between the Hunter and the Queensland border and west to South Australia.

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