Scott Morrison made an announcement…
Now I know what some of you are thinking: Our PM is pretty good with the announcements but it’s the follow-up that counts.
And yes, it’s true that some of his announcements haven’t been backed by strong action. Some of you will remember the “notional” bushfire relief and ask yourself why people are still living in tents but it would be silly to have rebuilt when there’s every likelihood that some of the houses may burn down again this summer.
And yes, some of you will point out that Morrison has a habit of re-announcing programs and funding that has already been announced.
However, today’s announcement is different. After the COVID-19 Committee of Committed Capitalists met and decided that gas was the best way to fix all the economic problems, a lot of people were surprised. Ok, the man running the show had the name, “Power” and he was connected to the gas industry but many people were expecting that maybe these people might suggest something like lifting the unemployment benefit because that could give retailers an extra kick along. But no, they unselfishly looked to the future and decided that we need to something about energy prices which – in spite of coming down $550 thanks to Tony Abbott, and in spite of the National Energy Guarantee that was an excellent policy that merely lacked a few details like exactly what was being guaranteed and exactly how it was going to work – are still too high.
So, after due consideration, Mr Morrison made an exciting announcement: The government will back a gas-fired power station. Just to break down this announcement into the important elements, they’ve said that they’ll build one if nobody else does. Of course, the government would rather it be built by private companies because they’re ideologically opposed to the government actually doing anything, so for them to actually spend taxpayer money to build something would be contrary to their beliefs that they – the government – are capable enough to manage any project or run any industry, so they’d ideally like a private company to step forward, but most private companies would rather make a profit, so it looks like the government will have to pay someone to do the job.
Yes, a new power plant. That should drive energy prices down when it’s eventually built which will be just as soon as the government finds out if anyone is going to build it and then after a process they can announce that they have things under control and that this shouldn’t cause any problems for Australia in meeting its 2030 targets because there’s no way that this will be built anytime before 2045. That should give hope to all the people who’ve lost their jobs and their livelihoods.
Speaking of which, I heard on the news last night that thirty percent of Melbourne restaurants would have to close in the next twelve months because of the COVID-19 restrictions, and I thought that must be a great relief to the owners because I’m sure I read somewhere that most restaurants don’t last twelve months so, not only is the figure lower, but the owners don’t even have to blame themselves for their business collapsing.
Anyway, if only these restaurants could hang on until they could afford the energy prices and if only people would work for free, then they’d surely be able to make a go of it.
At least they won’t have to pay that extra half a percent into people’s super. I’m looking forward to the next Federal Government submission to Fair Work Australia where they tell them that a half percent increase is a given before they even consider arguments for higher increases.
But I’m looking forward to the vaccine in January and to a strong, stable “no excuses” government like Abbott promised, the Budget surplus, good economic times and the unicorn ride…
Yep, with the amount of gaslighting the Liberals are doing, Morrison can certainly supply the need for an unlimited supply of gas…
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