The Land of Cadbury is a magical place. Whenever you want something just say the magic word abottandcadbury and hey presto…all wishes are granted.

Tony Abbott loves visiting the Land of Cadbury to indulge his guilty pleasures, describing it as his ultimate weakness.

The leaders of the Land, understanding his weakness and how much profit may be made from it, asked Tony if he needed any money for his accommodation and sundry expenses, a strategy that James Packer has found to work with people visiting the Land of Casinos.

“Well actually,” said Tony, “I am planning a cycling holiday with some friends soon and that would be a big help.”

He crossed his fingers, closed his eyes and said the magic word “abbotandcadbury” and hey presto…a big pile of money appeared before him.

Tony was so happy he promised to visit the Land of Cadbury again if he got a new job that he was going for, and that he would spend up big when he got rich.

Tony got the job but did not have time to go back to the Land of Cadbury (not until the state election anyway), but he hadn’t forgotten the generosity of his friends there. He sent a singing ministergram via Eric Abetz who used to visit the Land of Cadbury as a child.

“We want everyone to be able to enjoy the Land of Cadbury just as I remember doing,” said Eric.

The leaders of the Land crossed their fingers, closed their eyes and said the magic word “abbotandcadbury” and hey presto…a mountain of money appeared before them.

As the leaders hugged and kissed and generally started contacting their stockbrokers, Eric called for quiet.

“Just one thing guys. Don’t tell anyone else about this ok? We don’t want those non-sponsoring Lands kicking up a fuss expecting us to visit them too. You can’t eat Holdens and abbottandspc is just too hard to pronounce.”