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Political Wrecking Ball for Hire : Tried and Tested works every time !

Over the Christmas break, at a time when the last thing anybody wants to be thinking about is Peter Dutton, he came out with a nasty personal spray against the former prime minister, Malcolm Turnbull.

One of the things he said about the former PM was that “he (Turnbull) doesn’t have a political bone in his body and it’s not a criticism, but without political judgment you can’t survive in politics and he didn’t.”

Well, actually it is a criticism !

Dutton is a man who knows all about political jockeying, after all he mounted two attempts to unseat a sitting prime minister to install himself as our leader and failed in both. In the first attempt on 21 August last he missed out by 13 votes and maintained after the party-room snub that he is still the “best prospect” to lead the Liberal Party, but said that he will respect the result of the vote and support Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull.

That, of course was a lie : nobody believed him and sure enough Pete was still doing the numbers three days later when he mounted another challenge. This time he thought he had it all sewn up, having phoned all his mates who naturally pledged their undying support for his leadership. What it seems he didn’t know was that as he was phoning his supporters, Morrison was on call-waiting ready to convince them to vote for him, which is precisely what they did. So, in a deft display of political stupidity, Dutton managed to get the numbers wrong again. In the words of Oscar Wilde you could say that to get the numbers wrong once may be regarded as a misfortune, but to do so twice looks like a diabolical stuff-up !

Ever the optimist, Dutton was reported to have said that despite the loss, he still harboured the ambition to lead the Liberal Party but in the meantime he would give Scott Morrison his unwavering support and undying loyalty : Oh yeah, we’ve heard that one before somewhere !

Dutton quickly assumed his old job under the Morrison administration with barely any criticism for the damage he had inflicted on the Liberal party and the disruption to the orderly functioning of our parliament merely for him to pursue his own self-serving ambitions : he did however lose responsibility for immigration presumably because he had been calling for a reduction in immigration numbers without actually formulating an immigration policy as would normally be expected from somebody purporting to be responsible for immigration.

Then we had the unusual and yet to be explained issue of terrorism suspect Neil Prakash who was born in Australia of a Fijian Australian father and a Cambodean Australian mother. When Prakash was first arrested entering Turkey in 2014 , Julie Bishop as Foreign Minister cancelled his passport which restricted his ability to move around the world and expunged his rights as a citizen to return to Australia. For no apparent reason, Dutton then announced a week ago that he was exercising his ministerial discretion to take away from Prakash his Australian citizenship. It turns out that this was a bungle too as he could not do that. Prakash is not a citizen of Fiji as Dutton maintained and, under our legislation and in accordance with international law, we cannot make a citizen stateless at the whim of a poorly advised minister.

Fiji has confirmed that Prakash is not a citizen of theirs and did not meet the criteria for Fijian citizenship and noted that they were not impressed with an Australian politician trying to pass off a troublesome Australian citizen to a near and friendly neighbour. Dutton has dug in his heels and continues to maintain that he knows more about both Australian citizenship laws and those of Fiji : he doesn’t, he was wrong and he now leaves it to Scott Morrison to go cap-in-hand to Fiji and try to patch up yet another embarrassing blunder by the hapless Dutton.

Interestingly, Australia had an extradition application with Turkey to return Prakash to Australia to face the courts here. Traditionally, common-law jurisdictions like Australia have tended to exercise extra-territorial jurisdiction over their citizens only for very serious crimes. The Prakash case falls into that category. So, Australia could claim jurisdiction over Prakash because he was an Australian citizen, as a country has the ability to prosecute and punish its citizens solely on the basis of their nationality, wherever their alleged offence takes place. But by withdrawing his citizenship Dutton has effectively limited our ability to deal with Prakash by way of extradition processes.

As a wrecking ball, the Liberal Party has no further to look than Dutton. A man who manages to sail under the media radar by rarely making himself available to media scrutiny unless it happens to be a weekly love-in with Ray Hadley on 2GB or a scripted interview on Sky-After-Dark.

Even as the dust was settling over the leadership debacle Dutton declared that he had no regrets about bringing on a week of drama that had split the Liberal Party and halted Parliament. He continued to describe himself as a “better person” and a “person of greater strength and integrity to lead the Liberal Party” than Malcolm Turnbull.

You be the judge !

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  1. Ross in Gippsland

    Spud must have an enormous dirt file on every politician, staffer or person close to the levers of power in the Liberal party. It’s the only credible reason a fourth rate incompetent such as Dutton has been able to hang onto any sort of government ministry position for so long.
    Either that or all the other Liberal party government ministry hopefuls are raving imbeciles.

  2. Michael

    #flushthedunny (affectionate name for #LNP parliament) with royal commissions and #smashtheclosets (dirt files) for a fresh start.Michael

  3. David Evans

    And a Doctor on Nauru wins a Global Free Speech Award?….. “THEGUARDIAN.COM 17/1/2019
    Nauru doctor wins global free speech award for speaking out on offshore immigration”……. Golly, I just don’t know who is the better person…….Or who is “just dead to me”.

  4. New England Cocky

    “[Duddo] continued to describe himself as a “better person” and a “person of greater strength and integrity to lead the Liberal Party” than Malcolm Turnbull.”

    I think is fair and reasonable for Benito Duddo to stand for the leadership of the Liarbral Party in say March 2019 so that he has two months to seal the fate of the Federal election in favour of fascism, racism, and authoritarian government on a scale not seen in the world since Nazi Germany and Mussolini’s Italy.

    Naturally big business especially foreign owned multinational corporations will back this “progressive” move because Australian voters are using the Internet far too much and discussing politics far more often since Turdball politically felled Toxic RAbbott and Morriscum did the dirty on everyone.

    Next thing we know the Australian peasant voters will demand foreign owned cotton farmers stop stealing MDB environmental water flows, foreign owned electricity suppliers installed by various LNP misgovernments, always searching for a way to gift their mates more government subsidies, will be required to charge reasonable rates for electricity supply only.


    @Ross in Gippsland: “Imbeciles” is a polite word for greedy, inept, unthinking, self serving politicians.

  5. Michael Taylor

    This will get ugly (for the Libs) after Morrison’s looming election loss. Dutton v Abbott … more back-stabbing than an ancient Roman Senate.

  6. 245179

    The man oozes evil, truth is an irritant to him, he’s lower than a snakes belly, christ i loath him.

  7. paul walter

    Leave him alone. He is doing untold damage to his fellow Tories and should be the factor to both instruct the Aussie public as to its problem of complacency and see the LNP pitched out at the elections.

    Yes, Promo, you WILL have to call one eventually…a bit like visiting the dentist for a massive toothache , isn’t it, the way it is put off and put off. But you’ll feel better afterwards, with your conscience easing because you can no longer stuff the nation up. No hope for Mutton though, he will fulminate in his funk hole, like his hero the Mad Monk.

  8. helvityni

    NEC ,

    “[Duddo] continued to describe himself as a “better person”

    The more delusional you are the easier it is to keep self-confidence up…

  9. helvityni


    ” oozes evil…” Nicely said, all those lovely vowels….LOL

  10. John Hermann

    Why does Spud still retain a ministerial portfolio? US president Lyndon Johnson said, in his characteristic manner, that it was better to have a destructive person inside the tent pissing out than to have that person outside the tent pissing in.

  11. Peter F

    Dutton had a good tutor in Joh, who brought back a corrupt cop from western Qld, where the commissioner had sent him, and installed that corrupt cop as Deputy Commissioner. Within weeks the corrupt cop was Commissioner, and Joh and him where he wanted him. The result was inevitable.

  12. pierre wilkinson

    May herr dutton emulate his great mentor and idol and lose his seat whilst PM, but first we have to convince the COALition that ProMo is unsuited for the job as PM because, well, do they really need a reason?
    245179, don’t hold back, tell us how you feel

  13. George Theodoridis

    Love the guy. Love spuds. He’ll save the ALP from near extinction, just as spuds save the charcoaled Sunday roast from total embarrassment.

    Let Dupiter do his work of helping Bill. I don’t think Morrison can do that all on his own. After all, he’s not Zeus. Not yet, anyhow.

    Thank you Terence. I don’t know how you can handle the bowel turbulence that would be caused by even looking at this ball of turpitude even for a second, let alone the mental explosion that one must endure if one had to think about him long enough to write an article about him but thanks. Very brave indeed!

  14. Michael Taylor

    George, the article was worth it just to read your comment. That last paragraph was a gem.

  15. RosemaryJ36

    From many years of observation I have come to believe that there is a nucleus of males (and possibly a few females) who join the police force, believing they then ARE the law. Psycholologically they are totally unsuited to a job which requires them to uphold the law and protect those who are under threat of physical or financial harm. @PeterDutton_MP fits that profile perfectly! He is a bully with an incredible level of self-belief!

  16. Terence Mills

    Just listening to Assistant Minister for International Development and the Pacific, Senator Anne Ruston on ABC radio : when asked what Morrison meant when he said that the Prakash issue had all been sorted prior to the Fiji trip, she was unable to say what that implied and she was unable to say whether Prakash was a citizen of Fiji, Australia or a stateless person.

    So, if you want answers to that question you will have to tune into 2GB !

  17. George Theodoridis

    Michael, Helen of Troy was rumoured to have said to Paris of Troy, “Flattering, darling, will get you everywhere!” They ended up in Troy and a thousand greek ships were launched!

    …or was it Lauren Bacall to Bogart?
    Would you believe, Rita Hayworth to Glen Ford?

    Many thankses.

  18. Kyran

    What El Duddo ‘thinks’ in comparison with what ‘actually is’ would be one of those discussions best confined to academics, philosophers and theologians as a conversation of limited appeal and endless possibilities. One of those philosophical discussions designed not to be answered, but to be endlessly pondered from multiple viewpoints. For example;
    “”What is the sound of one hand clapping?” is a traditional zen koan — a question posed by a Zen master to a student.
    It is meant to be pondered from within the routine of daily life until the answer opens the true heart of the question. All koans must be answered from within the realm of one’s own personal experience, and thus be encountered in the journey of living rather than in the rationalizations of logical thought.”

    In his case, it would likely to be limited to his experience of injuring one hand while fencing. Not the noble combat sport requiring discipline in the foil, épée or sabre, winning points through contact with an opponent. The fencing where one is actually trying to build a fence, the symbolism of which hasn’t even escaped T-Rump. This fool has a painfully long track record of only ever making contact with himself and parading the resultant injury as a battle scar, rather than a self inflicted wound.

    The rather sad truth is that El Duddo has demonstrated repeatedly that he not only doesn’t think, but that any such expectation is simply unrealistic, given his alarmingly deficient ‘Intelligence Quotient’. Some 2.5% of the global population is believed to operate in the ‘below 70 IQ level’. They are yet to devise calibrations so fine as to be able to estimate the extent of this fools deficiency. Had it not been for his puppet master, Pezzullo, this fool would have disappeared up his own cloaca when his charges, his constituents (not the good people of Dickson, the Australian doctors) voted him the worst Health Minister EVER.

    It seems his only claim to fame, or infamy, is consistent ‘popular votes’ as ‘the most unpopular’. Not just by his own parliamentary colleagues, but everybody!
    “The home affairs minister, who is already facing an established GetUp campaign against him in his marginal Queensland seat of Dickson, dominated the activist group’s poll of most loathed politicians, attracting 22,028 first-place votes.”
    Given the list of contenders, this is quite the achievement. Even the good people of Dickson seem keen to kick the dick out of Dickson.
    “Dutton was a surprise almost-scalp at the last election, surviving a swing against him of 5.1% and winning by just under 2,000 votes.”

    If you look up ‘Ignominy’ in the dictionary, you will invariably find this mugs mugshot. It is interesting to note the ‘word of the year’ contests have made their annual appearance. Oxford Dictionary have gone with ‘toxic’, a serendipitous choice for our antipodean mishap, El Duddo. Macquarie Dictionary had a veritable smorgasbord of possibilities for the hapless, hopeless crusader of non-crusades. “Single Use” could well describe this fool, although what the actual use is is yet to be ascertained. Perhaps more appropriate, given the uncertain nomenclature of his electorate, Dickson, would be another contender.
    “big dick energy (a noun denoting a highly specific sense of self-confidence).”
    A more detailed explanation went as follows;
    “Coined after the death of celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain, big dick energy refers to an air of self-confidence unaccompanied by conceit or arrogance, and is supposedly the preserve of the well endowed.”

    He is undoubtedly well endowed in self confidence, however unfounded. He is equally well endowed in conceit and arrogance, given his own oft stated impression of himself. Given his renowned laziness, ‘energy’ may be a bit of a stretch as well.
    Ah well, may as well just go with ‘big dick’. To plagiarise Elizabeth Barrett Browning, with apology;
    How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways.
    I loathe thee to the depth and breadth and height
    My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
    For the ends of being and ideal grace.
    I loathe thee to the level of every day’s
    Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
    I loathe thee freely, as men strive for rights on Manus.
    I loathe thee purely, as they turn from praise.
    I loathe thee with the passion put to use
    In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith lost on Nauru.
    I loathe thee with a loathing I seemed to lose
    With my lost saints. I loathe thee with the breath,
    Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if your God choose,
    I shall not loathe thee better after death.

    “Political Wrecking Ball for Hire: Tried and Tested works every time!”
    Over to you, good people of Dickson. Kick the big dick out. Please, put him out of our misery.
    Thank you Mr Mills and commenters. Take care

  19. Kaye Lee


    The closest we got to an explanation was when ProMo said that Australia will adhere to Australian law and Fiji will adhere to Fijian law. Which tends to indicate there was no agreement at all. ProMo seems to be saying if Pete says it’s so then bugger what you guys think.

  20. Diannaart


    One law based on fact, another upon wishful thinking.

    The Liberal party of Oz, make believe and sleight of hand.

  21. Terence Mills

    Fijian Prime Minister Frank Bainimarama in a speech during Scott Morrison’s Pacific visit, called on Australia to put the welfare of Pacific peoples before the interests of any single industry [referring to the coal industry].

    “Here in Fiji, climate change is no laughing matter,” he said. Thought to be a reference to the joke made by Dutton at a Pacific Leader’s conference in Port Moresby in 2015 when Dutton said: “Time doesn’t mean anything when you’re about to … have water lapping at your door”. which he seemed to think was hilarious.

    Overall, it has not been a good trip to Fiji for Morrison, this from Bainimarama :

    “I urged your predecessor [Turnbull] repeatedly to honour his commitment to clean energy,” Bainimarama said on Thursday night in Suva.

    “From where we are sitting, we cannot imagine how the interests of any single industry can be placed above the welfare of Pacific peoples and vulnerable people in the world over.
    Pseudo election campaign heats up as Morrison joins Shorten in Queensland
    Read more

    “Rising seas threaten whole communities, forcing them to endure the trauma of relocating from land they’ve endured for generations.

    “Fijian farmers are watching their crops perish in soil that has been spoiled by the heightened salinity that is associated with sea level rise.”

    Bainimarama said the evidence of climate change was clear in the disappearing coastlines in Bangladesh and worsening flooding in the United States.

    “And in Australia as well, where soaring temperatures have reached record highs in several major cities just this week,” he said. “This cannot be written off as a difference of opinion.

    “Consensus from the scientific community is clear and the existential threat posed to Pacific island countries is certain.”

    You could say that Morrison had his arse kicked by the Fijian PM.

  22. George Theodoridis

    Hilarious what “auto correct” can do to your writing, it can turn your mundane prose into unique poetry. I’ve just noticed that my “flattery…” a common noun, used commonly in prosaic speech and writing ended up as “flattering…” a gerund used sparingly and with poetic intent.

    Thank you auto correct and sorry everyone for the navigation away from spuds and other vegetables in burgeoning in our Parliament.

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