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Malcolm, Money, Phone Calls And Clean Coal!


I’m sorry, I just can’t do it. It’s impossible to make Malcolm seem any more ridiculous than he actually is. I can’t exaggerate or make up anything that’s more absurdly pathetic than the clown we have as the token Prime Minister.

“I’ve always been prepared to put my money where my mouth is,” he told us, leaving us to wonder exactly why his mouth is in the Liberal Party coffers. But he didn’t go on to tell us that he put his money there in order to ensure that his government would get the opportunity to… (fill in the gap with “jobs and growth” or whatever slogan the Liberals parroted before the election). No, he put his money into ensuring that we “didn’t have a Labor government”! And we used to think that Tony Abbott was negative. But while his donation is pure and good, Bill Shorten should be ashamed because the unions donated to him and that makes him beholden to them. Whereas, in spite of his donation, the Liberal Party apparently don’t owe him anything.

Now, normally this would be a talking point, but Malcolm decided to push the envelope on “clean coal”. Because we’re a large coal exporter, goes the Turnbull logic, it’s a “no-brainer” that we should be pushing clean coal. The fact that there’s no such thing is irrelevant. When we talk about clean coal, we mean “cleaner” coal, and we have the technology to build brand, new shiny coal-fired power stations, because this is the way of the future because South Australia had a black-out and it was ALL the fault of wind energy because there have never been blackouts in states where coal is used to generate power. We need to look at the cost of renewable energy right now and compare it what clean coal might cost, if we invest a few billion dollars in the hope that we can make burning coal cheaper. And fracking, we need to start fracking.

It was like a heroin dealer arguing that soon he’d have clean, no addictive heroin, so there was really no problem and would these “do-gooders” stop trying to get people off the drug…

Then his assurance that company tax cuts would lead to a pay increase of $750 a year in the average worker’s salary. I wonder who did the economic modelling on that. Or was it just that it seems likely because whenever businesses get some kind of windfall, they put out a statement telling their shareholders that rather than increasing dividends, they’ve decided to pay their workers more because, after all, aren’t they the ones who really deserve it!

But I think it was his display over the phone call that makes me think he actually believes that he’ll still be PM at the next election. He actually thinks we’ll believe anything.

On Monday, Turnbull tells us that the asylum seeker deal was going ahead because President Trump had told him so. Today, when people are suggesting that this must have occurred after he hung up on Turnbull, our PM tells us that such calls are private so he won’t be commenting. So Malcolm can tell us that the call was warm and agreeable on Monday, but he can’t talk about what was in the call a few days later because such things are private. You know, like when he told us that if he had a problem with Trump’s travel ban, he’d do it in private because that’s what friends do. I guess Trump’s tweet today was meant to be private then. Or maybe he doesn’t consider Turnbull a friend.

Yep, Malcolm, you’ve done me. I can’t make up anything. You were stretching credibility when you told us that the Liberal Party didn’t have factions, but now you’re making Clive Palmer sound believable. What else have you got for us? Making Malcolm Roberts a minister, telling everybody that you know he’s not in your party but anyone with such a strong belief in quantifiable evidence just has to be included in our decision making? Or will you invest in Adani because you put your money where your mouth is, and coal has such a future?

I need a rest. Malcolm’s done me ‘ead in.


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  1. Jennifer Meyer-Smith

    I never thought politics could be so fun to watch.

    (I’d be laughing myself sick, if the fools weren’t in such positions of power that affect all our lives.)

  2. leighton8

    Yours and mine both …. ludicrous … that whine behind surely must be the sound of the knives being sharpened …..

  3. 1petermcc

    I do believe MT has Trumped Tony in the bullshit stakes. He seems to have completely slipped his moorings. Easily as bad as Tony just before his eviction.

  4. Freethinker

    Jennifer I guess that if the latter was not so serious I will laugh as well.
    The behavior of Trump not only affect Australia and it is a diplomatic nightmare in how to deal with this man before he get removed form power.

  5. Mark Needham

    Wonder if Bill, would back himself with $1,500,000.00?????

  6. Kate Ahearne

    Thanks, Rossleigh. I’m sorry to say, Jennifer, that I DID laugh myself nearly sick! Now I think I’ll have a nice cup of tea and a little lie down. And, Malcolm just so’s we’re clear, there’s no clean coal, only dirty coal and dirtier coal.

    I have been trying to do the arithmetic about how much per union member that $20,000,000 dollars in donations to the Labor Party would work out at, but I ended up with only about $12.50 per head. (On Bureau of Statistics numbers for 2015,there were 1.6 million union members in that year,) Wow! All those people contributing $12.50 each to the party which is after all, the LABOR Party, versus 1 person, Malcolm, donating $1.75 million to the Libs right before the election?

    Malcolm, you’ll go down in history as the Prime Minister who bought his job and tried to buy the approval of his parliamentary colleagues. And God knows what else..

  7. 245179

    “(I’d be laughing myself sick, if the fools weren’t in such positions of power that affect all our lives.)”

    We australians voted them there, the whole mob of them. ( we’ve made our bed, now we have to lay in it )

  8. Jennifer Meyer-Smith

    Don’t blame me. I didn’t vote the fools there.

  9. Jon Liddle

    He looked like a man who’d given up any pretence and was just letting it flow out his mouth like the the stream of shite it was. I never thought he’d make Tony look good, but ye gods…….

  10. Freethinker

    No 245179, I have not voted for them and will never put my vote for a conservative party.

  11. 245179

    When i said “the whole mob of them”……the whole mob, libs,lab,ind,ON, gre,……….the lot
    ( the goodies are sprinkled there, but not enough )

  12. Peter F

    As I have said earlier ‘Peace in our time’ All that was missing was the had raised waving the signed agreement. What a fool. At last we have the ‘no surprises’ government we were promised.

  13. Peter F

    It couldn’t have happened to a more deserving bunch. We must now call on them to act honourably towards these refugees.

  14. Peter F

    @leighton8 – that whine behind? do you mean that you have found Christopher?

  15. Peter F

    If I am correct, donations to political parties can be tax deductible. (ref: In this case it is possible that the tax office has contributed at least 30% towards this ‘donation by MT. Of course, if he does not pay tax in Australia, the tax office does not contribute, and it has all come out of whatever deep pocket he put his grubby hands into. …… Interesting

  16. Freethinker

    On the top of the issue about the phone call, it appears that the exemption for Australian dual nationals from Donald Trump’s tough new travel bans announced by the Turnbull government on Tuesday turns out not to be an exemption at all.
    I am embarrassed to have this government representing us in the world.
    I rather face a economic depression by showing the finger to the Trump government that be in my knees for material things.

    Perhaps we will need to change this lyrics if the Australian people do not express the fury about our government.:

    Beneath our radiant Southern Cross
    We’ll toil with hearts and hands
    To make this Commonwealth of ours
    renowned of all the lands
    For those who’ve come across the seas
    We’ve boundless plains to share
    With courage let us all combine

  17. Max Gross

    The end won’t be pretty but even as we all go down in a steaming pile of smoldering Murdoch manure, laughs will be had… Oh yes! laughs WILL be had!

  18. Jennifer Meyer-Smith

    True Peter F @8.43pm.

    On the other hand, as some other female commenter said on Twitter, it might even be 100% redeemable via Muck’s other capital ‘losses’ in his investments portfolio. I suggest that is much closer to the truth.



    I like your proposal for our new anthem. I’m bored with the other bit of shit anyway.

  19. 245179

    Won’t be hearing a laugh coming from this lil brown duck. I fear for the future of my children.

  20. keerti

    what do you call someone who buys themselves a job for 1.7 million dollars which pays about .5 mill a year? Certainly not a good financial manager! A fool and his money are soon parted! Or perhaps a tool and his money…

  21. Freethinker

    I agree with what Bob Carr have to say ( in a very “elegant” manner, quote:
    “Australian leaders are going to have to come up with a fresh approach. The language of sentiment and shared values will not work.”

  22. kerri

    Turnbull is now the living embodiment of rising to your level of incompetance!
    His face betrays a bewilderment and “lost boy” look that Hollywood would kill for?
    Trevor Noah on The Daily Show, made a comment pertainin to Trump that could equally be applied to Turnbull.

  23. paulwalter

    Glad to know I am not the only person with a smirk on my dial re “comeuppance”. Now that slimy bastard knows what it is like to an asylum seeker or Centrelink victim.

  24. Freethinker

    Just in case that some people forgot this, it is nice to see it again, it is relevant to the present news:
    Australia should “cut the tag” with American foreign policy after Trump win says Keating

  25. Jennifer Meyer-Smith

    While I’m angry with Keating for bringing neoliberalism into Australia, I fully support his attitude to Australia’s need to “cut the tag” with American foreign policy.

  26. Kronomex

    “Australia struggles to save refugee deal…” No it bloody doesn’t! It’s the cretins who run the country (rapidly into the ground to boot) that are desperate to get the deal through. It’s, sorry about the next word, f*cked so let it go and move onto the next massive stuff up…oh, lets see, the Centrelink debacle springs to mind. Turnbull’s grave, with him at the bottom, is getting deeper and deeper. This bunch have gone beyond farcical and are now in uncharted territory for an Australian government.

  27. auntyuta

    With American bases everywhere, how can you “cut the tag”?

  28. MichaelW

    “cut the tag”? It’s simple all Turnbull has to do is shirt front Trump just like Abbott did to Putin. You know give him a koala to cuddle, you betcha, you betcha.

  29. lawrencewinder

    The ludicrousness of the ruling rabble’s rants “clean(?) coal…. lower wages are the new norm…”are becoming more and more Kafka-esque by the minute.

    Their IPA/Tea-Party directed ideological insanity is here being seen, as experienced in the Un-united States at the moment, as the truly destructive mentality it is. The cacophony of criticism and satire they are now experiencing first hand with the attendant public embarrassment is only their malevolent due.

    Truffles and his ruling rabble #2 are evil. They and their IPA apparatchiks are at their logical end…they should be put away.

  30. Angry Old Man

    I don’t know whether to change my forum name to “Incandescently Infuriated Old Man” or “I just can’t be bothered giving a flying feck old man.” (String of obscenities, yada yada and so forth).

  31. Freedom

    Best thing that could happen from Trump slamming the phone down on Turnbull is the US/Australia alliance falls flat on it’s face. I understand why China is building bases on the islands. It’s the same reason Russia is moving troops closer to it’s borders. Because the USofA can’t help itself from waging wars of aggression the world over. If you can’t see Australia is now in the same situation America is in with potential terrorists arriving as refugees from countries Australia help blow to smithereens, then obviously you were never taught what happens when you throw rocks at hornet’s nests. I know all you intellectualizers will hate this but if Australia doesn’t implement the same refugee ban on terrorist countries, we’re in big trouble too because our leaders were (are) stupid enough (again) to enter a war that is not our problem. Now they are planning to launch a war with China from Northern Australia.

    I don’t want America’s wars anywhere on the planet and I especially don’t want America’s wars or their bloody soldiers in my country. Thank you.

  32. Kronomex

    We can all rest easy, Chris “The Fixer” Pynebox has said the refugee deal is fixed. Three cheers…

  33. crypt0

    The refugee deal ?
    Does that qualify as state sponsored people smuggling, or am I missing something here ?
    By the by, I think it unlikely in the extreme that the US is about to do us a large favour for the privilege of their accepting our refugees, however the reverse must be a high possibility.
    A few more US bases, perhaps, malcolm ?
    Or perhaps it’s time to start construction on the bunker to store the world’s (read US’s) radioactive waste immediately ?
    Rossleigh, you summed it up in your second sentence

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