“Hi there, this is your head of Public Relations, Scott Morrison with a very important massage:
“In 2017 over 3000 Australians died by their own hand. It’s affecting our young people, it’s affecting our veterans, it’s affecting boys and girls in remote indigenous communities. It’s affecting middle-aged men 45-50 living in suburbs, the highest rate of suicide in the country. Now just this week acting on OUR initiative to make a towards zero goal a national priority, I appointed Christine Morgan as the national suicide prevention officer and that should be enough so we don’t have to worry about doing things like raising Newstart because HOW GOOD ARE JOBS? We certainly don’t have to worry about Robodebt because people should pay back money which they can’t prove they don’t owe and certainly nobody can prove that they topped themselves because of the debt.
“As for those on Manus and Nauru, we don’t have to worry because our towards zero only includes Australians, so they won’t go into the statistics…”
Too far? Well, sadly it probably doesn’t go far enough because most of it is straight transcription.
Even the “How good are jobs?” was a response to Barnaby calling for an increase in Newstart. The man is a satire of himself, but who notices in a post-Trump world where the son of an immigrant can tell the daughters of other immigrants to go back to where they came from because they dare to criticise his America which isn’t like the “crime-infested places” they came from even though Trump himself complained that the USA was full of Mexican rapists and murderers, and whenever there’s a news story about a mass shooting there, I’m never sure whether it’s a new one or the same shooting that I heard about in the day before’s news?
Someone did a mock-up where footage of Hitler was inserted into a Trump rally. It only looked out of place because Hitler was black and white, and not orange.
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