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Fact hunt – the worst person of 2022

The End of an Error

Nominating those most worthy of their fall under the 2022 karma bus provides both a shortlist for fuck-knuckle of the year (FOTY) and solid evidence that the human species is at an evolutionary dead end when such bilge is the best we can come up with to run the world. It’s also a somewhat cathartic end to the year to call out these cockwombles, and it holds out some small hope for a better 2023.

I’ve pruned back a long list and may have overlooked some strong contenders – if you think someone truly worthwhile has not got a mention then please nominate them in the comments.

The Liberal Party. One of the great oxymorons of Oz politics, the Liberal (sic) Party is a collective noun for losers.

Corrupt by inclination, incompetent through habit, mean and nasty by nature there is no con they’re incapable of in any attempt to recapture the graft.

Kicked in the nuts at state, territory and federal levels, 2022 may have been the beginning of the end of this cabal of dolts, vandals and thieves.

Their dissolution can’t come soon enough – replaced by sensible independents and Greens with a few harmless nutters like Bob The Mad Hatted Katter retained as a repository for the irredeemable RWNJ vote and as occasional comedy relief – it can only be a good thing.

 

Image from Twitter (@TomRed43)

 

Spud and Suss – the meritocracy that is the “natural party of government” threw up the tuberesque undertater and his whiney sidekick. Bubba and Squeak are the best that Schrödinger’s opposition has to offer. These two are so ineffectual they barely even register as bad guys.

Liz Truss may have survived longer if she’d also gone that extra consonant – “Liz Trusss” has a certain multi-dimensional, reptilian cold bloodedness that could’ve keep the warm & fuzzy milquetoasts of the British financial establishment at bay until she fully sank the economy.

The horseshit producers from the Murdoch stable are another collective nomination. The plagiarists, phone hackers, bin rummagers, fossil fuel boosters, airheads and entropied fuddy duddies from the outrage factory of a withered, tax avoiding sociopath were left sobbing into their Tanqueray London Drys as their best efforts to turn Oz into a neo-liberal hellscape came to nought. $40 million in Lib government grants provided some consolation. Phil Coorey from planet Costello is an honorary member of this shameless Tory cheer squad.

Vladimir Putin‘s award of murderous psychopath of the century is likely assured but karma won’t have finished with him until his bloodied corpse is pelted with potatoes as it’s dragged behind a tractor through Red Square. Next year maybe. In the interim Vlad will not be admiring the views from any high windows.

Elon Musk, the world’s richest shitposter torched US$44 billion for Twitter and tanked Tesla shares as a consequence simply to show the cool guys how funny he is. He’s just a gormless twat with inherited wealth and Saudi riyals to squander but it’s his now revealed autocratic RWFWery that earns him a place on any list of prominent arseholes.

Honourable mentions

Cookers. No crazy is crazy enough for these whackadoodle ‘sovereign citizens’. Nutters desperately seeking relevance and importance as revealers of great truths in their otherwise dreary, meaningless existence?

They could be laughed off except these are the same types of deluded beer belly putschers, gravy seals and ammosexuals who invaded Washington’s Capitol seeking to murder Mike Pence and Nancy Pelosi and are of the type who did murder two young coppers and a neighbour in Queensland.

Barnaby Joyce. No list of fuckwits is complete without Baranaby’s name being included.

Matthew Guy. “Call me Matt” ex-Vic Lib leader and the loser of losers smashed by Dan Andrews at the last state election. Not the worst of the worst because he’s such a loser and so never achieved the level of prominence that would have allowed him to let loose his worst mobster instincts.

Brian Houston‘s invisible BFF rewards the worthy with riches so with the tithe taps turned off Brother Brian is learning what it’s like for those of us who are out of favour with the Big Guy in the sky. Karma ran over his prosperity dogma. Sad!

Katherine Deves. Apparently there’s blokes going about chopping off their cocks so they can win ribbons at women’s swimming carnivals but like most, I can spot a genuine minge a mile away.

The final contenders

The final three are possibly obvious – they have in common a natural affinity with lying, a talent for the grift, a narcissistic self-belief that goes beyond delusion and a physical presence that would make a cadaver dog gag. They are the smirking, prosperity god-fodder who disproved the Peter Principle six jobs ago, an adulterous £5 haircut on an unmade bed and an apricot-coloured fatsuit filled with congealed hamburger grease.

ScoMo, BoJo and Fuckhead.

After an uninterrupted run 2016-2020 Trump misses out this year, a has-been loser wandering the despot kitsch of Mar-a-lago accosting patrons with his tired schtick of the Big Lie as the walls close in on him.

Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson still maintains the collosal conceit of a Churchillian resurrection of his interrupted career as one of Britain’s great PMs. A dilettante, a wastrel, a shambolic opportunist and agent of chaos with no fixed principles he gave top spot as FOTY a good run but conceded the win to our very own Grange label on a goon bag – Smirko von Skidmark.

Purging Scott Morrison from our system requires that we be exposed to some bit more Scott Morrison. The brighter the light shone on the behaviour of Resting Smug Face, that reprehensible black hole of honesty where truth bends around him, the less likely it is that hypocritical God shoppers like him will ever again steal such high public office.

Smirko’s shortcomings are many, manifest and of consequence. A colourless non-entity who through happenstance, arrogance and a disdain for common courtesies and proprieties, whose abuse of trust and loyalty gained him a role for which he was entirely unfit. Devoid of decency this Jesus-espousing hypocrite bullied and hectored those least able to fight back. A mongrel; a coward loathed by those who know of him and those who know him.

The final, public humiliation of Scooter Morrison is a play in two parts – his parliamentary censure and his appearance at the Royal Commission into Robodebt.

His Scotty The Saviour-themed response to parliamentary censure included apocalyptic eschatology (“staring into the abyss”), blame-deflecting and, self-congratulatory claims to the efforts of others and wholly-invented assertions of heroism. His responses to questioning at the Royal Commission were a Morrisonian masterclass in deflection, avoidance and dissembling. If anyone was to blame it was those public servants, who upon his gaining office he instructed to do only what they were told and no more. What a gold-plated minger he is.

If justice prevails there will be part 3 – Smirko fronting the The National Anti-Corruption Commission. Perhaps there the dawning realisation that he is the most widely loathed politician in our history will elicit some <sarcasm> genuine contrition </sarcasm>.

*The End of an Error – from a sign held up at the inauguration of Joe Biden.

Former prime minister Scott Morrison does not intend to remain in parliament for the long term and is likely to start thinking about pursuing a business career in the new year, according to confidants. (Aaron Patrick, Australian Financial Review, 22/12/2022).

Who can imagine the standards of any organisation that would employ this POS?

 

This article was originally published on Grumpy Geezer.

 

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17 comments

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  1. andy56

    a shithead is a shithead, does it matter which is worse? left out one tony abbott and one donald trump.

  2. Michael Taylor

    Trump is there, andy.

    Thankfully I’m not. 😁

  3. Canguro

    andy56, correction, the three final contenders include Trump, aka Fuckhead per GG’s assignation and the graphic at the top of the article.

    Hard to improve on this; five stars for a sterling essay highlighting the Machiavellian arsehats who contrived to clamber to the top of the pole to shit on the rest of us from their contemptuous perspectives, and long may their collective demises reign.

  4. wam

    You lost me with the losers and the colour. The former(losers) has been in power for two thirds of this century and for over 70% since the ww11. Not bad for losers. To their credit Labor has won 2 and drawn 1 this century. The latter, the libs elect the loonies in labor seats and the loonies vote independent at ratios of 70% with 30% to labor. ps hanson and joyce are suss but how about netanyahu as number 1???

  5. New England Cocky

    Oh GG, what a wonderful way to finish 2022. However, I feel you overlooked Rupert the Withered ring master of the ”successful” nominees. A fresh cow pat may be served up in a posh restaurant with a sprig of parsley garnish ….. and it remains a cow pat.

    @wam: True. The loss of Australian natural resources to foreign owned multinational corporations has correctly been the master-stroke of the Liarbral Nazional$ COALition to the detriment of the best interests of Australian voters. This has resulted in Australia being among the world’s most exploited third world export economies, sending raw materails overseas for processing and profit-making for the benefit of others. Quite an unthinking policy really.

    Netanyahu is a fascist supported by American interests.

  6. pierre wilkinson

    it wouldn’t be a new year without GG’s assessment of the old
    and as far as Morriscum looking for another position in business, maybe sky news is that desperate

  7. Andy56

    My apologies Taylor and Canguro. My anger blinded me lol.

  8. wam

    Yes NEC,
    We, including most of the lnp voters, are the losers. Labor could do better by infusing some truths into the media.
    Perhaps a word about the results of the copperman’s $440m gift to a company of 4 people???

  9. Patricia Wilson

    The special mention award goes to……spook on the rise again
    Benjamin Netanyahu.

  10. Kathryn

    The worst person, so far, this century? My vote is the bone-idle, mother and father of ALL liars: Sloth Morrison!

    So the smirking, born-to-rule, misogynistic political psychopaths in the LNP are now feeling as blue as the symbolic ties they wear to show that they are signed-up members of the most inept, dangerously undemocratic and depraved “boys’ club” ever seen in this nation? The total rejection they suffered at the last election shows that Lady Karma has, at last, turned around and justifiably kicked their pretentious, smug backsides to the gutter where they truly belong.

    The fact that the wretched miscreants in the LNP have, for many years, formed an undemocratic alliance with Murdoch (their condemned Propaganda Minister) and the corrupt, privatisation-obsessed IPA (Institute of Public Affairs), makes them even MORE dangerous! The LNP, under the misguided mismanagement of three of the worst, most self-serving, tyrannical, regressive and nauseating bible-thumping hypocrites and war mongers: Howard, Abbott and Morrison, are (we hope) in the last dying stages of total irrelevance following a long bout of international condemnation, unspeakable inhumanity, non-stop corruption and misogynistic predation!

    The last federal election is the justifiable outcome after the type of depravity so many members of the LNP have sunk to whereby NONE of them have faced any level of legal retribution or consequence for their deplorable acts of escalating corruption, non-stop pathological lies and borderline fascism. The truth is that there isn’t a single vice one can name that these parasitic elitists in the LNP have not indulged in; no gutter too low that they haven’t wallowed in and no twisted lie, slander, connivance or deception too appalling that they haven’t stooped to in order to attain, and maintain, a shocking and terrifying level of fascist power.

    The fact that Morrison tried to surreptitiously – and undemocratically – take over at least FIVE PORTFOLIOS is not at all surprising – this was one of the final acts of borderline fascism that this totally depraved megalomaniacal narcissist tried to achieve with the assistance of a disgraced governor general who allowed it to happen! The amazing thing is that Morrison and Hurley had the stratospheric hubris to actually BELIEVE they could get away with it! The fact that this truly vile, malevolent political psychopath tried – and failed – to hide his unspeakable born-to-rule depravity, lies and corruption behind a thin, phony cloak of bible-thumping hypocrisy, makes him even more reprehensible (if that is at all possible). Considering the depths that the unconscionable, malevolent political psychopath, Morrison, is prepared to stoop to as the absolute worst PM since …. well, since the LAST sociopath elevated to the top by the unprincipled rabble in the LNP – Australia sure dodged a bullet at the last federal election!

    When the results of the last federal election showed a resounding victory to the ALP, nobody was really surprised! The overwhelming majority of intelligent Australians (with the emphasis on “intelligent”) had enough foresight to know that the wretched, self-serving Lying Nasty Predators had it coming. The LNP has proven itself to be a collection of depraved misfits, contemptuous elitists and self-serving rogues who seem incapable of holding down any type of responsible job out in the REAL world which is WHY they so desperately try to hang on to autocratic power with bloodstained fingers. The LNP have now shown us that they have failed to learn a single thing by allowing that truly revolting sociopath, Morrison, to float to the top like faecal matter in a polluted pond and on the back of Morrison’s treacherous betrayal of his OWN colleagues: Michael Towke and Malcolm Turnbull! Such bloody betrayals and backstabbing coups have become “standard procedure” within the LNP which is nothing more than a collection of the most avaricious, ruthlessly inhumane and self-serving political sociopaths in our history. The LNP have become a mecca to the worst kind of self-serving miscreants and ruthless predators – none of whom have a drop of insight, remorse or humanity and ALL of whom THRIVE on hate, fear, war, misogyny, xenophobic racism, slander and the callous disregard for the most vulnerable people in our community! Just be eternally grateful that the LNP have been so thoroughly rejected – for now.

    With that heartless, mean-spirited and corrupt multi-millionaire, Dutton, waiting in the wings like some demonic behemoth waiting to take over the reigns of such an appalling, undemocratic and remorseless party as the LNP, Australians cannot afford to be complacent! It is now OUR responsibility – indeed, it is our moral DUTY – to ensure that the despicable miscreants and dangerously undemocratic dictators in the LNP remain in OPPOSITION indefinitely. Why? Because if there is ONE thing history has taught us is that the callous psychopaths and pathological liars in the LNP will NEVER EVER change!

  11. Patricia Tancred

    In the name of gender equality (this list is a bit dick [in every sense] oriented) let’s not forget Gina Swineheart, who, in a gold (or iron)-plated snit, withdrew sponsorship from the netball team because they drew attention to her hideous old, thankfully long-dead, father’s utterly vile racism. Just goes to show, Gina, the iron knob doesn’t fall far from the mine that spawned it.

  12. Gangey1959

    The right (dis)honourable d hurley has escaped a mention. As a co-conspiritor in shouty’s secret grab for muti-portfolio power, our gg proved beyond doubt that the office he holds is totally redundant, and that he himself is a twat.

  13. leefe

    Patricia:

    In this sort of matter, I agree wholeheartedly with the LNP’s official dogma: never mind quotas, select on merit. And GG has done a pretty good job at that although your mention of Ms Rinehart is utterly appropriate.

  14. Brad

    Perhaps the emperor of fake news, the majesty of tabloid press, with one hand around the neck of democracies and the other fondling in the skirts of politics far and wide might have been given a specific mention given the old scrotum was instrumental in the election of your final contenders, Mr Geezer.

  15. Arky

    Worst person of 2022 is Putin and nobody else is close. Scotty from Marketing’s banal brand of Evil Lite pales into insignificance next to Vlad’s piles of corpses and war crimes, let’s have some perspective.

  16. Fred

    Arky: You have convinced me with the “dead body count” perspective – Putin is the clear winner.

  17. Colin

    Moriscum managed to kill well over 2000 Australians so like Putin he is a mass murderer. Let the Russian people put Putin at the top of their list.

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