In an interview with the Opposition captain yesterday Billy ‘Polls’ Shorten said that his team had a 53 – 47% lead over the other mob and were now clear favorites to win the series.

To use cricketing parlance cracks are beginning to show in the pitch. The pitch that is that Malcolm is making to the Australian public. In fact some of the cracks might indicate a turning wicket.

For some time now I have been suggesting that the Prime Ministers policy agenda has been to out policy Billy ‘Polls’ Shorten by taking the running on all the big agenda items. With the NBN, Gonski and the NDIS. It was a clever move to copy his score book that had all their policies listed in extras.

Some say the theft was by Dutton who was often seen loitering around the change rooms looking for proof of citizenship.

Having pinched the opposition’s game plan he has exposed all he has so there’s not much chance of making a big score. Really I cannot see him producing a policy to rival the importance of these. In fact, the current state of play would suggest a possible run out toward the end of the next season.

However current state of play indicates a subtle but significant shift in how the game is being played. The Prime minister is on the front foot firmly behind the ball playing a straight bat while the opposition leaders bowling is negatively offline. If fact he has been no balled a few times this week for deliberately bowling wide of the crease.

So let’s see if we can analyse the match thus far. Remembering this is a six test series.

The ABC programs The Drum and Insiders indicated that they are prepared to play ball by reporting on the other teams’ tactics in a fair and factual manner.

This is most refreshing. I think it happened during the drinks break. All that’s needed now is for Insiders not to be caught behind. As for the mainstream media they have never been much interested in reporting on the finer points of the game. The News Ltd pay wall sites didn’t think the principles of truth and fairness is necessarily good for its demographic. It’s more about the bottom line a spokesperson said. Poor form that.

QandA however said that for its part it always gave both sides a fair go but it would like to have more say in the selection of the team without getting constant interference from the Chairman of the board. Christopher Pyne for example got to many games and was often on a pair.

It has to be said that Pyne is often on the back foot without a policy to run with. He needs to perform better if he gets a second knock. Some say he needs a manager because he has been handling himself for too long. He should be batting down the list where he belongs.

The other one is Peter ‘Slimy’ Dutton who is often found well out of l his crease and was stumped several times when he wouldn’t give an undertaking that in future he would accept the umpire’s decision.

It’s fair to say that the Government has been creamed on the NBN. Turnbull often looks like he is acting as a reluctant runner for the injured opener and it’s a pity they couldn’t have used the 12th man to run between the nodes. It would have been faster than the captain’s effort. But nonetheless he is the captain.

He is known to be up to speed on the subject but he reckons he is a good bat out of form.

Reporting on social media demonstrated that the LNP policy had been hit for six. To add injury to a policy that Ponsford would have better understood we find (according to Akamai Technologies) that Australian Internet speeds fell 23% during 2012 and we are now ranked 41out of 98 nations. Time to bring on the quickies.

No doubt Turnbull copped one in the box over marriage equality. The protector needs something like speedos to keep it in place otherwise everything hangs loose.

The PM has been comprehensively hit to square leg over his decision to steal the other sides Gonski reforms. Simply not cricket the public judged.

On Friday the team mascot Christopher ‘The Fixer’ Pyne said the children of Australia would benefit from the implementation of Gonski. Last season he was using words like unhinged. When he was the Minister he said he couldn’t be bothered reading it. One might well argue that the no balls rule is being ignored. Rule books should be read.

Added to that is the fact that Mr Turnbull has nicked one to slips over his plan to cut the taxes of his most privileged supporters. And the players aren’t to happy about it. They were caught out on this one. So much so that they have pulled out of the next tour. Something to do with penalty rates for playing on Sunday’s.

And the team’s sponsorship might be under threat. And it was interesting to see that Essential reported that their latest poll gave the women’s vote 48% to Labor. Pity they couldn’t all field in slips.

Our AAA ranking is under threat if we don’t vote LNP according to the leader. It’s a strange, weird mind that suggests that the government that has worked so hard to achieve it, is the one threatening to bring it down.

Rather reminds me of something Merve Hughs said to a spectator at fine leg at the ‘G after dropping a catch: “Fkn” hopeless. And of course, it escaped Turnbull’s notice that triple ratings are judged not only on the country’s ability to produce surpluses but also on the ability to manage debt. Certainly not for bowling doosras or even worse underarm.

The problem with gays considering themselves equal in all forms of the game has reared its head again and the captain’s solution is to spend $200 million on something we already know.

God we will have enough trouble with the poms. Its simply not cricket. Well it’s lucky I play by gentlemen’s rules. Nothing queer about that I know. It’s just that the bloody captain doesn’t have the balls to shirtfront the anti poofters trying to get a game. Appalling bad sports. It’s a pity we can’t appeal to the third umpire.

And now he’s talking about booby traps and watering down past statements as though all the lies of the past few years were just batting with the breeze. I think he must have been hit with a bouncer while not wearing a helmet. Concussion set in and when he recovered he realised that there are real known facts in the world and that truth does matter.

During the short of a length Leigh Sales interview in which she accused the PM of low politics over his answers to questions during question time about Climate Change…

My God, I bet he felt like he had just copped one in the nuts from Malcolm Marshall. Bloody hypocrite. No wonder, a captain who bats at 10 is a cricketer’s arsehole.

And then during the lunch break he starts sprouting about climate change and our energy policy.

A sponsor from the old fossil industry suggested he should reconsider his direct action policy in light of costs of lighting up the ‘G.

The captain of the side said he didn’t have any plans for any more power than he had. We haven’t had a plan for a decade so there’s no real hurry. Anyway he said we would need an enquiry before proceeding. He needed to appoint someone like Joyce who could bowl spin on sticky wickets.

The way I see it is that the leader should disregard the conditions and just get on with the game but the problem is that there is so much infighting within the team. One past captain doesn’t believe that the game has passed him by and is just hanging around stirring up shit.

And then there are a group who have openly stated in the change rooms that they thought he was a little stiff at the time’ but there was never much length in his bowling. The feeling in the press corps is that the government leader will retire early rather than be embarrassed by an innings. Who will replace him? Will the former captain get a second chance to lead the team? Well given the team is full the worst performing lot in the the country has ever seen. He just might.