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A Double Dissolution – The Non-talking Point!

Ok, so let me see if I’ve got this right. Turnbull is threatening to call a double dissolution if Labor and The Greens don’t pass legislation to re-establish the Howard government-era industrial watchdog the Australian Building and Construction Commission. And the reasons for this are based on a secret report from the Royal Commission in Union Corruption written by Justice Heydon.

Justice Heydon, one remembers, found himself completely unbiased after considering the matter for several days. He asked himself if he could be perceived as biased and concluded that only people on the wrong side of politics could conclude that and, as they were all thugs, crooks and liars, he could just ignore what they thought.

While obviously this secret report needed to be kept from all the lefties, it was all right if the cross-bench senators viewed it provided they didn’t tell anyone what was in it, because, well, if people found out what was in it, they might ask why don’t the police just investigate the criminal wrongdoing, rather than establish another government run thing. After all haven’t we been told over and over about the need smaller government and less regulation?

But hey, just to be fair, the government has just decided that one Labor person and one Greens person could also peruse the secret report, providing they also promised to just shake their heads and say that it was shocking and no wonder it has to be kept secret. (Both Labor and The Greens have decided that there’s not a lot of point in looking at it if they can’t share anything with their colleagues!)

So, unless the government gets this important legislation through the Senate, Malcolm Turnbull is threatening to take this to the people via a double dissolution.

“People,” he intends to argue, “there are some things that we can’t tell you and they’re very important things that Justice Heydon found which we’d like to tell you but we can’t for reasons to do with secrecy and the fact that we never comment on operational matters. However, let’s not forget that Bill Shorten appeared at the Royal Commission and, even though it didn’t find anything to charge him with, Justice Heydon still thought that Bill had shifty eyes and bad breath. Besides, Mr Shorten allegedly did a deal with a company that got rid of workers’ penalty rates, which is just outrageous because penalty rates are well… you know a drag on economic activity and if we got rid of them we’d have JOBS and GROWTH. Just remember, you can trust us, because Labor lied about the carbon tax whereas we’re being upfront about a GST, just like we were upfront when we said that all this talk of a GST rise was just a Labor scare campaign. The carbon tax was ineffective because it didn’t reduce emissions anywhere but in Australia. And that’s the thing about the Labor Party, they’ve been so negative in Opposition. Bill Shorten, negative, negative, negative. All this talk about Gonski is just a smoke screen to distract you from his negativity. Why Labor are saying that I’m just Tony Abbott in a better suit, and while it’s true that I do have a better suit – a much better suit, because it’s no secret that I can afford to dress well – I think this is the politics of envy. And even though, I haven’t actually changed any of the policies, I’m more than Tony Abbott in a much better suit. I’m much, much more – I have principles and a completely different moral outlook on the world and just as soon as I’m given permission, I’ll ask that nice young man if I can have my soul back now, and then I’ll allow the plebiscite on same sex marriage, and, presuming that it won’t cost me the leadership, I’ll give all the Coalition members a conscience vote where they’ll be free to ignore the plebiscite. I know that some are suggesting that takes away the need for a plebiscite, but that’s because you’re listening to Shorten who’s being negative again. And the Republic, I mean, what’s the hurry? There’s no need for a vote in the Queen’s lifetime. Or mine, come to that. Just remember that JOBS and GROWTH depend upon you re-electing us so we can bring down a responsible, austere Budget where we cut spending while raising the GST by 50% even though we don’t have a revenue problem. Let’s be clear about the choices here, if we don’t bring back the Australian Building and Construction Commission, then there’ll be no stopping all the things in the secret report which we can’t let you know about. And it’ll also mean that there’ll be no JOBS and GROWTH, the boats will start with the people smugglers being paid penalty rates, and we won’t be able to lower company tax which doesn’t just benefit multinationals – it benefits people like you and me because whenever a company pays less tax, it immediately says that it’s making too much profit so it better employ more people. And if Labor get back in they’ll just waste more money by trying give you an NBN that people can use. People of Australia, your choice is clear.”

So, have I got it right, because it seems a little confusing to me!

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  1. diannaart

    Not confused at all, the LNP support small government, except when they don’t – Australian Building and Construction Commission, Border Control, anything military and private schools, obviously.

  2. Geoff Andrews

    I smell a rat.
    What could possibly be in, what we know to be, a biased report that the government could be coy about? Something that could embarass the government?
    I think not.
    National security? A potentially libelous statement?
    Or, how about something that is an absolute winner for the government; a coup de grace to Labor that would have a much more damaging effect if they were “forced” to reveal during, say, an election campaign.
    I’m sure the ads are being written right now.

    Turnbull is probably the only member of the coalition to have read “Julius Caesar” in which Mark Antony cunningly gets the crowd to demand that he read Caerar’s will, knowing that the contents will turn the crowd against Antony’s enemies.

    The heavily edited scene:

    ANTONY (On the forum, addressing the crowd)
    ‘Tis Caesar’s will (holding aloft)
    Which, pardon me, I do not mean to read–
    The will, the will! we will hear Caesar’s will.
    Have patience, gentle friends, I must not read it;
    Hearing the will of Caesar,
    It will inflame you, it will make you mad:
    Read the will; we’ll hear it, Antony;
    You shall read us the will, Caesar’s will.

    Antony “reluctantly” reads the will.
    Beware the Ides of March, people.

  3. terry

    a moral is close to a truffle, bout as close as turnbull gets

  4. Sir ScotchMistery

    The truly shocking bit is that with all that awful LNP grammar ignored, the bastard is right. Well no. Actually he’s left but he’s right about being left and if we don’t ALL hurry up we’ll all be left right behind which sort of reminds me of something I heard about footy in first grade, where they had the first eleven, the first fifteen, the ten commandments and a guy playing left right out in the centre, none of which made sense at the time, because I hadn’t finished arithmetic or geometry before Mousey Porter dragged me out the front and gave me six of the best.

    But what to expect I always reckoned that he batted for the other side and got off on walloping my cute 11 year old arse.

    And Christ it’s hot.

  5. Alison White

    Marry me Terry – you are my soul mate…LOL

  6. Ella

    Rossleigh…very interesting read.
    So we have had operational matters ..that could not be discussed.
    We have had half truths, blatantly misleading information for us the gullible to swallow.Not to mention the lies.
    Now we have threats of a double dissolution directed at Labor and the Greens…BUT …IS IT?
    I think it is a veiled threat to the cross benchers in order to remind them that they could loose their seats in an election.
    I hope that they have the courage of their convictions and not support the ABCC bill.
    They have more to gain than they think.
    And I thought PM Abbott was bad !!!**?!!!

  7. Steve Laing

    Malky has realised that if the punters continue to get too good a look at the pish that the Libs are serving up, the honeymoon will definitely be over. And whilst he is making the big pretense that he’ll wait till spring, he knows that as time goes on, and just like as with Tony, the people will increasingly see that the Emperor has no clothes (well, clothes he has plenty of, but no workable policies). So their only chance is to try and pull a fast one based entirely on Malky’s own popularity, giving them a chance to blame Labor, the Greens and the Senate Cross Bench for one last time that they’ve been forced to a DD.

    More of the conniving you’d expect from these amateur reprobates.

  8. Clean livin

    So, the Government will call a DD on a matter that is secret and where not allowed to know what that secret is.

    “Trust us” will be the mantra.

    Certainly better than the Abbott approach, where he won any election on lies!

    Can’t see it flying though. Politicians might think the electorate is dumb, but the electorate think politicians cannot be trusted.

    Shades of “vote for us! No changes to ABC or SBS funding. No reductions to health and education, etc”

    Perhaps the Libs might even use Abbottto campaign!

    Once again, Fat Chance!

  9. jim

    Scrape penalty rates, increase the GST by 50% why not vote for them? those alone will insure the Rich gets Richer and the poor can GGF’d Quote:The decline in emissions from this sector increased from 3.5 Mt in the year to 2011-12 to 6.5 Mt in the year the carbon price was introduced (2012-13). The decline then grew even more, with emissions dropping by 7.6 Mt, the largest annual drop to date, in the following year (2013-14)C Tax introduced..

  10. David

    Interesting thread friends, very interesting and excellent reading, thanks

  11. Paul Murchie

    ehrm … wouldn’t calling a Double Dissolution mean that the reason for calling the Double Dissolution would have to be discussed with someone outside the immediate Cabinet ? oh … the Governor General, but not the People. i get it now. the Budgie Party must be in such chaotic disarray that, rather than introducing all those Grand Ideas for the Country (which is so obviously and thankfully in his thrall !) that he’s been so dedicated to the development of, since he’s he had such an uncomfortable time in the stinky old underpants of #28 (SIX YEARS OF THAT ! FFF), he’ll keep those to himself (lest the ALP should steal them) UNTIL AFTER THE NEXT ELECTION. WTF ? why not just EXTEND THE LNP’s RULE by TEN YEARS by THE IMPOSITION OF MARTIAL LAW ? now there’s an idea worthy of the Mutton’s dead-eyed attentions !

  12. Lee

    Like night and day. Like pre and post election. Thank you Rossleigh for that most excellent Turnbull tirade.

  13. Max Gross (@Max_Gross)

    Oh, yes, please, Malcolm! A DD is what I wanted for christmas! So go on, I DARES ya!

  14. Backyard Bob

    I’m not sure a DD is very likely. Even if Turnbull were to contrive it in the belief that his personal popularity might grant the Coalition a more favourable Senate, it’s pretty risky. Plus the timetable for that now takes into the time an election is likely anyway. A DD at this time could very easily be argued to be a petty political ploy (because that’s in fact what it would be). Not sure the electorate is entirely in the mood for that sort of shite. For me the odds are heavily agin it.

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