whatisscottmorrisonplanning…

Ok, I had trouble with the punctuation for the title. I thought of several possibilities.

  • What is Scott Morrison planning?
  • What? Is Scott Morrison planning?
  • What is? Scott Morrison planning!
  • What! I S-scott Morr is on planning…

Just too many possible ways to punctuate it so I just decided to write…

Now, just in case you don’t know me, I’m a very circumspect kind of guy…

I mean, I can actually consider the possibility that it may have been better if the Germans had won World War Two because it would have meant that all military uniforms would have been better designed and there’d be a bigger market for Australian wool, but I digress…

Ok, it would have been bad for my Jewish friends… but if Hitler had won I wouldn’t have had any Jewish friends and – just like those non-racist people who say that the Indigenous population should thank their lucky stars that it was the British who brought disease and guns to their country because the French would have brought them disease and guns in a much less considerate way… And when I say their country, I have to be careful not to offend people who want us to declare our allegiance to the Crown every day but don’t like the Acknowledgement of Country being recited ever…

Which reminds me, this was meant to be about Scotty from Irrelevancy…

Now, I should be careful because apparently God has a plan for him and I may be jumping the gun when I call him Sooty From Irrelevancy because he may be just going through his Book of Job# moment, so when he says that he’s not in a foetal position in an interview I suspect that he’s just trying to tell God that he’s fine with His plan and that he’s happy that he’s been able to help by getting rid of those people in the Liberal Party who don’t abide by Him…

Sooty… that was a typo but sometimes God moves in mysterious ways and who is to tell us that that it wasn’t part of God’s plan to have me make that typo and lead to SootyfromIrrevelancy being forever known by that #hashtag… Amen!

To cut to the chase, I’ve been reading “Bulldozed” by Niki Savva (autocorrect made that “Niki Savage” which means that sometimes autocorrect has a point…).

When you put it all together it’s hard to decide if Scotty was just a poor, deluded man who succeeded by lying when nobody had records of anything he said* and he didn’t adapt to the big stage where there were records and film, or whether he was happy to endorse Katherine Deves – in spite of warnings that this could ruin the chances of people like Sharma and Zimmerman – because he believed that by endorsing her that he was helping rid the Liberal Party of those heathen moderates and one day soon, God will deliver him back the leadership and he will dwell in the House of Righteousness forever. (I’m paraphrasing the 23rd Psalm but isn’t it ironic that House of Representatives and House of Righteousness are completely the same apart from the different letters after the R?)

So, is he sitting in Parliament waiting for the call to arms where he sits in his Rightful spot? Or is he just waiting till he can use his vote to deliver the next chosen leader?

Like I said before: Punctuation can be hard and sometimes people don’t know where the full stop should go. !

#In the Book of Job, Satan bets God that Job is only good because good things happen to him and God says I’ll take that bet… which makes all the hullabaloo about betting advertising a bit anti-religious… I mean, it’s bad enough that God showed Noah a rainbow and told him that it was a covenant that he’d never flood the Earth again… God doesn’t seem to be the sort of person that the Lyle Sheltons of the world like…check your Genesis, Lyle and friends…

*I used to work with someone like that. He could just insist that his version of events was the right one and eventually people would give up because he didn’t and it just wasn’t worth the stress of trying to prove that their recollection of events was somehow accurate just because his was full of contradictions. I mean that works when there’s no film of you saying the complete opposite of what you just said. Sometimes… No, I never said that it worked all the time… in fact, I’m pretty sure that I never said that it worked…

 

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About Rossleigh 1447 Articles
Rossleigh is a writer, director and teacher. As a writer, his plays include “The Charles Manson Variety Hour”, “Pastiche”, “Snap!”, “That’s Me In The Distance”, “48 Hours (without Eddie Murphy)”, and “A King of Infinite Space”. His acting credits include “Pinor Noir Noir” for “Short and Sweet” and carrying the coffin in “The Slap”. His ten minutes play, “Y” won the 2013 Crash Test Drama Final.

6 Comments

  1. Morrison is planning a different grip on the todger, less thumb pressure, more subtle finger easing, possibly longer pleasuring, some huge and better intellectual outpourings, yes…the world needs more autoerotic selfsatisfying, for leadership of course…

  2. Does anybody REALLY care what the redundant megalomaniacal narcissist and bible-thumping hypocrite, Morrison, is doing? Now that he has been thoroughly rejected by 99.9% of Australians – including his OWN depraved political party – we should just allow this appalling excuse for a human being sink back into irrelevant obscurity where he belongs!

  3. Personally, I think Scotty of the Jesus is planning on rising from the Tomb of the Back Bench to attempt to reclaim the Pedestal of the Leader.

  4. @ Kathryn: Scummo is only irrelevant AFTER he has departed Parliament, either resigned or removed from the Parliament for the term of the Parliament, to provide another two (2) seat advantage for the Albanese LABOR government to fix the disaster of the nine (9) years of COALition misgovernment against the best interests of Australian voters.

  5. I believe Jenny doesn’t want him hanging around the house so told him to piss off back to Canberra

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