Ok, now I know that some of you are going to presume that I’m just going to play with words and point out that the prefix “In” usually means “not”, so an invaluable contribution should be one that’s not very valuable. Sort of like when someone says something is “priceless”. I mean, if it’s worthless it also has no price but that’s not what they mean.
Anyway, I’ve been reading poor Timmy’s tweets and I must say that if ever I’ve seen someone suffering from Relevance Deprivation Syndrome, it’s me. I mean, I was going to suggest that it was young Timmy but why should I give him the attention he so richly craves. After all, it must be hard to go from someone who was considered a future leader of the party to your Jaguar when you’ve had to walk there without any help from your parents.
In case you haven’t been reading his pronouncements, Mr Smith, MLA, has been complaining about everything from the weather to being verballed by a 14-year-old to the wokeness of AFL football because we don’t have any masculine biffo anymore. His tweet was something along the lines of go Rugby because it’s a real man’s sport and AFL is just too easy…
Tim, I should remind you, was a rower and there’s nothing more masculine than a group of men all facing the one direction and moving together when somebody says “Stroke”… Ok, I guess line dancing could also be described in similar terms but if you can think of anything else, I don’t think you should add it in the comments in case you are giving away the reason that the Australia Club won’t allow female members.
I hope that didn’t sound homophobic… I mean, I have a lot of faults but I’m always striving to be more politically correct than the next guy… or woman… or non-gender specific.
Oh fuck, it’s just impossible for an old, white male these days… Ask Jeff Kennett who’ll surely tell you his opinion even after the whole state made it clear that nobody wants it…
Anyway, after Timmy’s tweet, he was all the rage on Twitter for a while and it was almost like he was back to the good old days when he could text journalists and they asked his questions to Dan Andrews at press conferences. He replied to one tweet with “Sorry petal if I offended you…”
It’s good to see Timmy mending fences instead of driving into them.
However, I digress…
Which is sort of the point of Tim Smith and Matt Canavan and Peter Dutton, isn’t it?
They’re just so bad.
Somebody commented that, about the worst of Peter Dutton being not much better than the best of him and I had to seriously think about the question: Is there a best of Peter Dutton?
I mean, some Canberra journalists will tell you that – in person – he’s the life of the party and his public persona is not the man that he actually is… And yes, when I say that Hitler used to love his dogs, there’s sure to be some arsehole who invokes Godwin’s Law even though I never tried to draw any link between Dutton and Nazis. As far as, He Who Should Not Be Named goes, well, I didn’t name him either. Whatever, Dutton is not as bad as the most evil people in the last century and he certainly isn’t as bad as J.K. Rowling who said something that I disagree with.
And that’s surely the point of Matt and Tim and Peter. They make the rest of them look so much more reasonable. I remember when we laughed at the “Joh for PM” campaign in the late 1980s. I was at Billy Bragg’s concert where he made jokes about it, but then left us with a warning that the problem was that after Joh someone would come along and – by comparison – they’d seem okay.
And thanks to Matt and Tim and Peter, then the moderates like Hollie Hughes and Dan Tehan and Angus Taylor and Alan Tudge and Alex Hawke…
Oh, I see…
Yeah, the days of looking good compared to the previous front bench may be over for the federal Coalition.
But at least, down here in Victoria, Tim Smith is making a concerted effort to make his leader look good by comparison with his praise of Rugby League over AFL.
If that doesn’t get him expelled from the Victorian Liberal Party then they might as well disband now.
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