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Scott Morrison’s Activity OR Why Wasn’t The Energiser Bunny On The Ballot Paper?

“I was simply trying to encourage [Mr Shorten] to tell the truth and to look me in the eye”.

“He couldn’t do that either. He scurried away,” Mr Morrison said.

“Wisecracks and stunts isn’t how you run a country. I’m happy for Bill Shorten to put on a cabaret performance in a debate but that’s not how you run a country and that’s not what Australians want to see.”

We’ve been treated to many tales of how ScoMo has energised the campaign. We’ve been told that he’s been busy going from place to place bowling cricket balls, shearing sheep, playing tennis and dribbling the odd soccer and basketball. However, it seems from his comments about Bill Shorten that a cabaret performance is not relevant when it comes to running the country. Scott’s capacity to dribble does seem to have some relevance according to the media.

Yes, both Scottie and the media keep telling us that Bill Shorten has been getting caught up with tricky questions about policy. Bill is required to talk about his own policies rather than performing gymnastic backflips, milking a giraffe or whatever physical activity that Morrison had performed. What energy from the PM! Wow, this is impressive and exactly the sort of thing that should determine who runs the country.

Ignoring all this, I was confused by an article which suggested all these early voters were somehow a threat to democracy. Apparently, we should wait and hear the finer points of policy that may be released in the final two weeks before we go to the polls… Or rather before we’re meant to go to the polls. Some people are ignoring what the writer defined as the proper way to vote: Listen to everything the leaders say in the two weeks before the election date, check to see that they don’t make some slip of the tongue, judge the energy with which they run around promising things which are normally state responsibilities in marginal electorates and completely ignore all the history of the previous performance.

In this particular election, that would mean ignoring the promise of stability by Tony Abbott in 2013 only to beat Labor by having, not just three PMs, but three different deputy PMs as well, the stuff-ups in the NDIS, the NBN and energy policy, the various projects that spent millions without going to tender, the large number of Liberals deserting the sinking ship, the refusal of the Coalition to admit that there’s a problem with endorsing female MPs, the refusal of the Right wing rump to compromise when it comes to just about anything causing policy inertia and… Well, the list is pretty long, but you can see why some people may be saying do I really need to wait and see if Scott Morrison manages to convince me that if they’re re-elected we’ll all be given an extra slice of cake and that wages will start to grow again thanks to employers being so grateful for a Coalition government that they decide that they’re profits are large enough and they’ll give workers the 3.25% predicted in the Budget?

They better or else the promised Budget surplus may just be a ridiculous idea floated by the Liberals to get themselves elected but they try to ignore later on…

And speaking of Tony Abbott, did you catch his comments to the student protesters about climate change? Apart from telling them that he had a responsibility to tell them the truth, not just agree with them – which I think we’ll all agree is a welcome change from Tony – Mr Abbott proclaimed “the earth has survived many things”.

Yes, that’s true. I’m sure the earth will survive climate change. It’s mankind I’m not so sure about. Still, we can be just as blasé about that destructive species as we are about various others.

Mr Abbott went on to announce that he didn’t think that the environmental catastrophe predicted by scientists would happen. He didn’t seem to elaborate on reasons for this, but it’s also worth remembering he predicted a Budget surplus once he was elected. He did add: “I’m not saying that there isn’t going to be some time in the future when, for whatever reason, things come to an end, but I don’t believe that modest increases of atmospheric carbon dioxide concentrations over the next few decades are bound to bring about the kind of environmental catastrophe that you seem to fear.”

Well, that’s good to know. It reminds me of the doctors in the 1960s telling us that smoking was good for our health. Why? Who knows, but they believed it.

Anyway, in two weeks the election will be over and we’ll no longer have those silly articles telling us how close things are, how the leaders’ debate didn’t produce a clear winner and how a change in methods of calculations gave the Liberals an extra point in the two-party preferred voting.

The simple truth is that Liberals are starting from a position of minority in terms of seats and they have to not only win seats, but stop Labor from winning in seats where it’s generally conceded that they will. I’m not suggesting that this can’t happen. I’m simply suggesting that it’s even less likely than the Liberals running an ad based on the old energiser bunny commercial where they show Scott Morrison racing to the finish line while Shorten conks out…

Actually, that may happen now that I’ve put it out there. Of course, it would run the risk of people suddenly demanding to know why the bunny wasn’t on the ballot paper. No, I don’t mean Peter Dutton, the bunny who paved the way for Morrison to become PM. No, not Turnbull either. You know, the one that used to be in that commercial.

Never mind…

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  1. Alcibiades

    After ~1995 days of the ‘Kill Bill’ campaign, Morrison has failed to win two debates, that’s 0-2 Scomo … as the incumbent PM. Preferred PM ? After adjusting for his 16 point incumbent bonus(for having a pulse) most recent was Morrison 29 v Shorten 37 ?

    Record enrollments. Record youth enrollments. Having lost every single Newspoll, 54 of ’em, even the most recent clearly manipulated ones, for the last term. Excluding two rogues, 104 lost since 2013(IIRC). Pre-polling in record numbers of, as predicted, ~40%.

    Seats on supposed margins of 4.6%, 7%, 11.1% & 20% very likely lost. Warren Entsch, convinced by the party it’s critical he not retire so as to try to save the seat, so desperate to counter an LNP history of climate denialism, is preferencing the Greens first in Leichhardt(QLD)(3.9%). No LNP policies, no ‘vision’, no Ministers available to front the press or the voters, whilst a swag of others are in witness protection …or lose even more votes.

    Just shouty, lying bully boy Scummo, doing ‘daggy dad’ ‘everyman’ photo ops & stunts,day after day …

    A campaign so pathetic, Sith Lord Darth Sidious(Emperor Ruprecht Murdoch), after having discarded each of his previous apprentices, instructs his latest loser to impersonate/photoshop himself as a Rebel ? A Jedi ?!
    – ‘Team’ Scomo …vote winners one & all (Image)

    Bookies odds 20Mar19, a fortnight before the faux ‘Budget’:
    ALP 1.14
    LNP 4.50

    Today, with less than a fortnight to go:
    ALP 1.22
    LNP 4.25

  2. Rossleigh

    The higher number of prepoll votes suggests a strong Labor vote. It’s more likely to be people saying, “I just can’t wait to get rid of this pathetic government”, rather than I’m keen to vote because I want everything to stay the same.

  3. Alcibiades

    Indeed, voters remorse for two terms, entrenched since Turnbull fell over the line in 2016 by one seat. There are negligible contra-indicators to a public long anticipating the opportunity to turf ’em out.

    Worst start position for the Conservatives since ’43. And fickle, uninterested, un-engaged ‘swing’ voters routinely throw out third term Federal governments on a whim. So, given this lot ? Trying to win seats from behind …

    Still anticipate an ALP seat count of between 85 & 90, at this stage. Many surprises to come the evening of the 18th methinks.

    The fact Dutton, Abbott, Hunt, Andrews, Sussan Ley & others, even Frydenberg, are desperately campaigning in their seats is a key indicator the ‘known’ public faces of the LNP are decidedly on the nose. (Image)

  4. Kaye Lee

    Odds for “Both Tony Abbott and Peter Dutton fail to get elected at the Federal Election” have shortened to $2. That’s a quinella I would love to get up (so to speak).

    Labor 81 to 85 seats is shortest odds at $2.85 with 86-90 not far behind at $3

    It may sound prudish of me, and it is certainly hypocritical, but I don’t think it’s appropriate for the PM to be doing a pub and club crawl drinking his way around the country.

  5. Paul Davis

    “I have a plan, my cabinet has a plan, my government has a plan. We will work hard for all hard working Australian families. We are building a strong economy so that those hard working Australians who have a go will get a go. Labor can’t be trusted with money, they can’t manage money. When they have spent all the money they come for your money. Labor are going to steal the savings from hard working Australian familes and retirees who have worked hard to save for their retirement.”

    That is in essence the policy statement and call to action of our current conservative prime minstrel (not a typo).

    Like every Liberal leader from Menzies the pre-election war cry is always the same constant … “steady as she goes ” “don’t rock the boat” “change is risky” “the left are dangerous unprincipled socialist spendthrifts”.

    For any undecided voter here is a challenge. Make a list of every nation building or outstanding legislative contribution or enhancement that improved our common wealth or quality of life from federation in 1901 to now. Now note the ‘political inclination’ of the government responsible for each of these, ie, conservative v progressive, leftist v rightist. There’s your answer, now go cast a sensible vote.

  6. New England Cocky

    Yet to be confirmed suggestions out of Tamworth (Barnyard Joke’s electorate at present) have the Nat$ strategists conceding an election win to Labor in the House of Reps and concentrating on winning in the Senate where they will obfuscate, prevaricate and filibuster business to frustrate the Labor government until the 2022 election.

    Shades of Malcolm Fraser in 1975.

    Time for 24 hour real time reporting on an AEC website of all political donations made by natural persons representing themselves or a nominated corporations and limited to a $1,000 per person per rolling 12 month period.

  7. totaram

    Paul Davis: “For any undecided voter here is a challenge. Make a list of every nation building or outstanding legislative contribution or enhancement that improved our common wealth or quality of life from federation in 1901 to now. Now note the ‘political inclination’ of the government responsible for each of these, ie, conservative v progressive, leftist v rightist. There’s your answer, now go cast a sensible vote.”

    I wish people could do this. Most of them don’t know the truth. It’s like the Trump voter in the US who was going to lose her medical insurance because of his changes to “Obamacare”, but still wanted to vote for him! Humanity is going to go extinct, I am pretty certain. It will all be its own fault. Another failed experiment by evolution. Oh, well! It will start again from whatever is left and see what it can do in another 200 million years. Good luck!

  8. Patagonian

    Have you ever sprayed a blowfly with fly spray and watched its increasingly demented circuits of the room, bashing into walls and other objects before finally crashing to earth where it emits a faint buzzing sound as its legs flail about in the air before it finally carks it? That’s Morrison in election campaign mode.

  9. New England Cocky

    But Kaye Lee, that is exactly the election strategy used by the former, and wants to be again, Deputy Prim Monster, none other than Barnyard Joke, the representative of the Nat$ in New England, he of the adulterous preference and alcoholic demeanour, who as the Minister for Water was solely responsible for purchasing empty glasses of water for $80 MILLION and proponent of massive dam building to provide water to the foreign owned multinational mining corporations wanting to destroy the Great Artesian Basin as they dig up Australian coal for export while paying a little royalties and taxation in Australia as possible.

    I just dunno, you people expecting pubic figures to be rational, intent of improving the best interests of Australian voters and wanting a future for our kids and grandkids, are being totally unreasonable according the IPA financial patrons. Why would a political party founded to improve the lot of farmers & graziers be expected to protect their water supplies when foreign owned multinational mining corporations can pay far more on the open water market than Australian agricultural enterprises can afford?

  10. Kaye Lee


    If it was up to me, I would make Parliament House an alcohol and smoke free zone like other government workplaces.. And I would do random drug and alcohol tests on politicians. Those who failed could have their income quarantined and given a card that they could only spend at certain shops. Welcome to how the rest of us live.

  11. LOVO

    That’s a bit harsh, Kaye Lee…., What, …no Havana’s out on the balcony… crikey 😃

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