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Scott, Gladys, Australian Values And Other Dead Fish

What a week, eh?

In response to drug deaths at music festivals, Gladys Berejiklian expressed her sorrow and told her audience that she was prepared to try anything. Pill testing? No, because we have no evidence that it will work. Perhaps we should give it a try and see if it provides some evidence. No, because that would send the “wrong signal”.

Yes, that would send a signal that we actually want to try to do something about drug deaths instead of crying crocodile tears. Imagine if, instead of introducing random breath tests for motorists, we’d just said, “No, that would send a signal that drinking was ok. Instead, we’re just going to tell motorists not to drink and drive, and if they kill themselves or anyone, that will teach them a valuable lesson.”

But credit where credit is due. At least, Gladys was talking about the problem of drug deaths. Scott Morrison’s solution seems to be to insist on local councils holding citizenship ceremonies on Australia Day. Australia has had a long tradition of celebrating the national day going all the way back to when I was in my early thirties, so it’s only right that an Australian government should dictate to local councils that even though citizenship ceremonies are held throughout the year, that there needs to be one on the anniversary of the Rum Rebellion, where a leader was removed after a revolt by his subordinates, thus beginning the most honoured tradition in Australian politics.

Morrison didn’t mention that these must be called Australia Day Citizenship Ceremonies, so I’m presuming that if a council wants to advertise it as “Invasion Day – You Too Can Be One Of The Many Immigrants Who Ignores The Wishes Of Indigenous People”, there’ll be no problem as long as it’s held on January 26th.

Of course, Scott can’t have a position on everything. Although he did tell us that all those dead fish were the result of drought and not because we were draining the lakes too often to help irrigators. Suggestions that Barnaby had treated the river system as though it was a member of his staff were just wrong. Scott’s solution? We need a dress code for the citizenship ceremonies.

Surprisingly, this dress code bans thongs and board shorts, rather than making them compulsory. There was no mention of whether akubras would also be banned, or whether everyone swearing an oath of allegiance would need to wear a baseball cap with the most recent donor to the Liberal Party plastered all over it.

SloMo assured us that he was the “prime minister for standards”. He didn’t list which PMs were against standards. My experience has been that everyone thinks we should have standards; the only disagreement is what they should be. The word ‘standard” is also another name for a flag… When it comes to being the PM for flags, you only have to remember all those Australian ones that grew in number in inverse proportion to Abbott’s standing in the polls, to realise that Tony has him beat on that one.

As for the refugee who “chose” Canada over us, just because we sometimes take several years to process applications and she didn’t fancy spending her youth in a Thai airport, Scottie hasn’t been considering it an “on-water” matter and therefore not something to comment on.

Ah yes, remember when Promo was Immigration Minister and he announced that he wouldn’t be doing a running commentary on “operational matters”. He was going to do a weekly update, where he specificially didn’t comment on what was happening. The weekly briefings soon stopped, but nobody seemed to notice.

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43 comments

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  1. PeterF

    So, we have a government by minors. when will the adults reappear?

  2. Terence Mills

    I like the allusion to Barnaby treating the river system like a member of his staff !

  3. helvityni

    We got to have standards…I’m stressed because I have not quite managed the ‘greedy look’ when eating hamburgers….

    I’ll take some time off other chores to study how Scomo does it….

    I don’t think I’ll learn it from Angela or Macron, but Trump too might teach me a trick or two….

    Rahaf said that she also wanted to enjoy being a teenager, and being retained on any island for years is no laughing matter…

  4. helvityni

    Many people also believe that Australia is already full, but they forget that asylum seekers are usually skinny people and you can fit more slim people in trains and buses , and in small cars…

    We all can also lose weight and became lean if we do our commentary whilst running…..hey, ‘running commentary’….?

  5. New England Cocky

    “[Morriscum] did tell us that all those dead fish were the result of drought and not because we were draining the lakes too often to help irrigators. Suggestions that Barnaby had treated the river system as though it ws a member of his staff were just wrong. Scott’s solution? We need a dress code for the citizenship ceremonies.”

    The problems are: 1) LACK OF WATER FLOW.

    2) Political donations to the unelected political hacks who control pre-selection in the Notional$ Party.

    3) Politicians protecting these political financial patrons by ignoring any and every attempt to reduce water theft by over-pumping, or pumping contrary to the seasonal requirements.

    The Cause is: THEFT OF MDB ENVIRONMENTAL WATER FLOWS BY BROAD ACRE FARMERS IN SW QLD & NW NSW.

    The solution is: 1) SATELLITE PUMP MONITORING DEVICES fixed to each and every pump taking MDB water to record in REAL TIME the pumping activity at EVERY PUMP.

    2) Proper regular and irregular supervision of the pumps by Inspectors, with stiff financial penalties, say $1 MILLION per prosecution for the first offence, doubling for the second followed by at least five (5) years jail for the third and later offences.

    3) PLUS LOSS of pumping entitlements for a season for each offence.

    Nat$ Adulterer-In-Chief Barnyard has caused this tragic crisis by protecting the broad acre farmers; indeed, he had f##ked the MDB and his “bit of rough” press agent showing the true “National$ Family Values” of Adultery, Alcoholism, Avarice, Bigotry, Hypocrisy, MIsogyny, Philandering & Racism.

    Why do Tamworth women support these values? Is Tamworth the “Country Adultery Capital”?

    VOTE ANYONE BUT NAT$ & SAVE MDB COMMUNITIES

  6. OldWomBat

    The bar on morrison’s standards is so low that a snake would have trouble getting underneath it.

  7. Andreas Bimba

    Rapacious greed and sadism – Scomo, Beetroot Barnaby, Mr Potatoe Head, Cormann, Gladys, Kevin Andrews, Abetz, Big Mining, Big Banks, Big Cotton, the Nats, the Libs …….

  8. Zathras

    Why Morrison seems to be emulating the chaotic nonsense style of Trump (including the ridiculous baseball cap) is a mystery to me.

    Then we have the thought-bubble populism of releasing pedophile lists to the public because “if it saves just one child it would be worth it” but that same reasoning simply doesn’t apply to pill-testing.

    Drought is blamed for massive fish kills but policy has played no part.

    The only dress code I would support is for mandatory big floppy shoes, red noses and crazy coloured wigs for these government clowns to wear in public.

    It’s a self-serving circus full of contradictions that has no purpose.

  9. Zathras

    Why Morrison seems to be emulating the chaotic nonsense style of Trump (including the ridiculous baseball cap) is a mystery to me.

    Then we have the thought-bubble populism of releasing pedophile lists to the public because “if it saves just one child it would be worth it” but that same reasoning simply doesn’t apply to pill-testing.

    Drought is blamed for massive fish kills but policy has played no part.

    The only dress code I would support is for mandatory big floppy shoes, red noses and crazy coloured wigs for these government clowns to wear in public.

    It’s a self-serving circus full of contradictions that has no further purpose and it’s time they just got out of the way.

  10. Keith

    Brilliant as per usual, Rossleigh.

    A couple of weeks ago I was pondering whether to hold extreme right wing views people need to have undeveloped, or damaged frontal lobe problems. A recent study suggests that those with fundamental religious views have such problems. Though, people can be socialised into holding aberrant views.

    https://www.rawstory.com/2019/01/link-brain-damage-religious-fundamentalism-established-scientists/?fbclid=IwAR0mneaOWD395zt96kRICA_bX050ygD-8EiHcaijCWoO2gCmo47NqDXozuQ

  11. blair

    the beautiful thing about standards is, there are so many to choose from

  12. Peter F

    In the time that remains for him, I would like Morrison to continue to emulate Trump. Why hide his inner self?

  13. lawrence winder

    Why shouldn’t the actions of Barnyard and Scummo be considered treasonous?

  14. Cliff

    When Scum Mo start wearing his baseball backwards you will know that he has reached the bottom.

  15. Josephus

    New England Cocky- yes, that is the only way. But as long as business donations continue to flow, water flows do not matter. Mines can suck up millions of litres of good water, farmers can use artificial fertilisers, can pump all they want. So now communities are beginning to find that they lack clean water. Vote these dangerous fools in baseball caps or Akubras OUT. Probably too late, though.

  16. paul walter

    Liked Terence Mills allusion involving the polluted ruin that is now the Darling river. The death of the river should signal a landslide victory for the coalition next election, Australians celebrate this sort of destructiveness.

  17. Kronomex

    Scummo and his cronies are determined to wreck as much of Australia as they can as they head to defeat (massacre?) at the election. You have Demonuci trying to grab as much power to destroy more people before he’s removed as the Monster for Horror, I mean Minister for Home Affairs, and hopefully right out of politics, with his latest effort –

    https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2019/jan/16/peter-dutton-could-strip-another-18-peoples-australian-citizenship-under-new-powers

    After the election they’ll waste no time screaming the LNP mantra…no need to say what it is is there. Oh yes, what are the chances of the mad monk being reinstalled as leader of the oppostion?

  18. pierre wilkinson

    funny thing about this drought killing fish, it seems to have garnered a few 100 year old fish that just managed to survive all the other droughts….
    and why isn’t Labor being blamed for all this? or the greens at least? surely they are responsible because it is quite apparent that our government isn’t responsible at all: in any way

  19. jake francis

    and apparently the (rich) graziers aren’t happy – well dam(n) – perhaps you should look beyond blindly putting a 1 in the nats box next time

  20. Paul Davis

    Dear Leader McShoutyface is wooing our Pacific neighbours seeking to continue the supply of cheap temporary labour for the estates and businesses of his mostly rural barons.

    The NewDaily also reported today that: Australia is promising to help Vanuatu and other Pacific nations deal with the effects of CLIMATE CHANGE to help maintain their way of life. Prime Minister Scott Morrison is the first serving Australian leader to visit Vanuatu since 1990, meeting with Prime Minister Charlot Salwai in Port Vila on Wednesday.

    “We’re very committed to funds in the Pacific to deal with programs to deal with the impacts of climate change here,” Mr Morrison said at the beginning of a meeting with officials. To address the impact it’s happening on particular communities, and to ensure we can put in place programs which protect those communities, and to ensure the continuance of lifestyle and the way of life.”

    You couldn’t make this stuff up….. Of course our unbiased non partisan press will not say a word about this duplicitous lying weasel. Apparently Australia only believes in climate change action for others, eg when negotiating to buy serfs for agribusiness.

  21. Diannaart

    ”We’re very committed to funds in the Pacific to deal with programs to deal with the impacts of climate change here,” Mr Morrison said at the beginning of a meeting with officials. To address the impact it’s happening on particular communities, and to ensure we can put in place programs which protect those communities, and to ensure the continuance of lifestyle and the way of life.”

    Yeah, and to ensure this cheap workforce does not try living here, except when we choose.

  22. paul walter

    Yes, more likely they will commit “aid” to thepolice, to knock down dissent when it starts to surface.

  23. paul walter

    Btw, can I spare a moment to think of our hosts, who live in Albury, where the heatwave is long term and freakish as to heat and temperatures?

  24. Michael Taylor

    45 here today, Paul. It’s going to be hot for at least another week. It’s keeping us busy with the watering.

  25. Kaye Lee

    Scotland sounds nice….just sayin….

  26. paul walter

    Look after.

    Just remember, at the end of every heatwave, there is another heatwave just waiting ’round the corner.

  27. Michael Taylor

    Aah, Scotland. Oh to be in the Highlands right now.

    In fact, it’s that bloody hot here that I’d even take the Orkney Island again. I don’t care if it’s -10 and windy enough to blow us off the island. Sounds wonderful.

  28. paul walter

    I think we get a break from it after tomorrow in Adelaide but it is up again by Monday.

    Scotland. Or maybe Scandinavia.

    Canberra is also copping it, so maybe there is a god after all, provided enough politicians and civil servants are back from their long holidays.

  29. paul walter

    Seriously, these are freaky weather stats from Xmas day on for Albury, running into the next week at least. Why wouldn’t you move to Marble Bar for some relief?

  30. Rossleigh

    There was an ABC article saying that the top ten temperatures for the previous day were all cities in Australia. In the comments, there were many arguing that the rest of the world was in the Northern Hemisphere and therefore in winter.
    I know Geography isn’t my strong point, but I did think that South America, many Pacific Island Nations and several African countries were all in the Southern Hemisphere with us. Of course, I also thought that there were some rather hot places near the equator, but I could be wrong.
    Other commenters told us that, when they were a child, the temperature would regularly hit 110 degrees. I trust they did understand that we no longer measure it in Fareheit!

  31. helvityni

    Never mind the heat, there’s so much in the news to make you feel happy:

    Scomo is telling people in Vanuatu that he’s been for people of Vanuatu in the past, he’s there for them now, and he will be there in the future….

    Ken Wyatt has told the ABC that the use of physical and chemical restraints in nursing homes is “totally unacceptable”.( In one case examined by the ABC, a resident was strapped in a chair for 14 hours and heavily sedated with antipsychotic medication).

    Of course the fish will die when we have such high temperatures, but people have to realise this has absolutely nothing to do with the CC…more with Labor and the Greens…it’s their fault….

  32. MöbiusEcko

    I wish the media would do their job and pick up pollies when the prevaricate in this manner.

    In an interview with the Deputy PM, the reporter asked about the state of the Murray/Darling. His response was that the fish kill and toxic water quality were due to an unprecedented long and harsh drought. I’ve emphasised “unprecedented”.

    When pressed on water mismanagement, Murray/Darling policy and authority failure, he responded by saying droughts like this are a natural part of the Australian environment and this one is part of the cycle, in the near future there will be a massive downpour with people not knowing what to do with the abundance of water. That contradiction within two sentences was not jumped on and should have been.

    The PM did a similar thing the other day. Blaming a record drought and then going on about the fish kill being a natural cycle.

    Can both these supposedly learned men explain how 100+-year-old fish managed to survive all those previous droughts but not this “natural” one?

  33. paul walter

    The nursing homes stuff made me sick.

    Getting close to twenty years since Bronwyn Bishops “petrol bath” nursing homes and as usual, nothing has changed beyond the platitudes.

  34. MöbiusEcko

    But, but, but, paul walter there is a Royal Commission into nursing homes that according to the government ministers I’ve heard interviewed, will be The catholicon.

    It will be very much like the AFP investigation into Michaelia Cash.

  35. Diannaart

    Unprecedented natural cycles; LNP at their witless best.

  36. MöbiusEcko

    Yes, Diannaart. But why didn’t the media jump on this blatant contradiction being peddled by them? On both the occasions I heard the LNP trot out this ambiguity it lept out like a bright flashing neon sign in pitch blackness, yet both times the reporter accepted the explanation of natural occurrence without hesitation.

    Is it that the LNP are so ambiguous and obfuscatory so often that it passes by the media without notice or retort?

  37. helvityni

    paul walter
    January 17, 2019 at 11:48 am

    Euthanasia is not that easy to achieve, to be chained for fourteen hours into a chair is much easier; pay the money and enter any available nursing home…

    My in-laws chose a third option; they returned to Holland and had many happy years ahead them…

  38. DrakeN

    MöbiusEcko,

    You must surely have noticed by now that the commercial media and its acolytes are simply propaganda outlets for the IPA et al.

  39. paul walter

    Mobius Echo, it is true they are like Dr Faustus. They now bleat pathetically, full of contrition as they realise their time is up and their odyssey of malicious, pointless self-indulgence is coming to an end.

    Like Teresa May, they will, in a panic, haggle and bargain, squirming against the self-imposed bonds that now hold them fast, but as with the UK, the damage has already been done and the Cash antics is just one of many blatant episodes that have had a cumulative effect on their credibility. Kaye Lee did a brief summary a couple of days ago, but I recall pages- long lists of their criminality presented at different times at this site and others.

    No, the slighted and humiliated Mephistopheles now gleefully bides his time and they will be figuratively torn limb from limb when that reckoning that is the next election comes to pass.

  40. 245179

    MöbiusEckoJanuary 17, 2019 at 1:05 pm
    Yes, Diannaart. But why didn’t the media jump on this blatant contradiction being peddled by them? On both the occasions I heard the LNP trot out this ambiguity it lept out like a bright flashing neon sign in pitch blackness, yet both times the reporter accepted the explanation of natural occurrence without hesitation.

    Is it that the LNP are so ambiguous and obfuscatory so often that it passes by the media without notice or retort?

    “both times the reporter”……

    too many “reporters” are lacking in “ability”, they don’t have the smarts to see shyte, call it for what it is. They just jockey to shove a mic under someones nose, get a responce, then think ( geez, don’t know what they think ) but anyway the responce was garbage, reporter is happy tho.

  41. David Bruce

    The Murdoch media should read their own stories?

    It hasn’t been this hot since the record breaking temperatures 80 years ago? The majority of the state (NSW) is forecast to exceed 41C from Wednesday to Friday, something the Bureau of the Meteorology says has not been seen in 80 years.

    https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2019/jan/16/australia-weather-record-breaking-heatwave-enters-third-day-as-temperatures-soar

    The climate change will be worse next year and beyond, because of the proximity of Jupiter and Saturn and El Nino!

    http://www.973fm.com.au/newsroom/experts-predict-australia-could-enter-mega-drought-lasting-twenty-years

    As one former MDB dairy farmer said, Australia will soon have to import Milk Powder.

    This will be a bit of a pain, because overseas suppliers don’t follow the food standards for “pus levels” in milk powder!

    The South Pacific Islands are getting funding from Australia to boost their security forces to protect Australia’s north eastern frontier? Good one ScuMo!

  42. RosemaryJ36

    The standards for the care centres and nursing homes MUST be amended to regulate the level of training of staff and the minimum staff/patient ratio. If staff numbers drop then so must patient numbers and checks on standards must be random and frequent.

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