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Scomo of the Hash #Smoko

I had written him a letter which I had for want of better,
Knowledge sent to where I met him down at Maccas years ago.
He was knifing when I knew him,
So I sent a letter to him,
Just on spec, addressed as follows,
“Scomo of the Hash #Smoko”

And an answer came directed,
In a writing unexpected
(and I think the same was written in potato wet with starch)
‘Twas his numbers man who wrote it
and verbatim I will quote it
“I still can’t count to forty, and we don’t know we’er he’s Marched

In my commitment to all God-Bros,
Visions came to me of Scomo,
Hopping off on a some big jet plane as the fires burned down below.
As the troops are fiercely sprayin’,
Scomo flies above ‘em Prayin’’
For a PM’s life has pleasures,
That the townsfolk never know.

And Trump has friends to meet him
And their kindly voices greet him,
In the murmur of the beaches and the luau under stars.
And he sees the vision splendid,
Of the Rapture now extended,
To Oz, the wondrous glory of great fires now seen from Mars.

I am sitting in my dingy – little office,
Where a stingy
Ray of sunlight struggles feebly,
Down between the plumes so tall,
And the fetid air and gritty, of the fiery ravaged city,
Through the open windows floating,
Spreads the foulness over all

And in the place of lowing cattle,
I can hear the fiendish rattle,
Of the fire trucks and their hoses making hungry down the street,
And the language uninviting
Of the Twitter children fighting,
Comes fitfully and loudly through the thunderous click of Tweets.

And the screaming people daunt me
And their pallid faces haunt me
As they shoulder one another in,
Saving koalas in their haste.
With their eager eyes now bleedin’,
And their stunted forms now heavin’
For townsfolk have no time to go,
Taking Shelter, no time to waste.

And I somehow rather do know,
That I’d like to change with Scomo,
Like to take a turn at hiding,
As the crises come and go,
While he avoids Questions eternal,
From the Walkleys and their Journals,
Cos he knows he don’t suit The Office,
Scomo of the Hash #Smoko.


An adaptation of Clancy of the Overflow. By A.B. (Banjo) Paterson

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  1. RosemaryJ36


  2. Sully

    Disappeared without a trace. Not even a message of support for the firefighters, and those who are in the face of the fires, and those injured and those who have lost everything. Not even a tweet of support.
    As for the Media, they are equally silent on Morrison’s silence.
    It is as if he has done a Harold Holt.

  3. Roswell

    Outstanding, Trish. Poetic juices run deep.

  4. Ill fares the land

    Interesting. Great poem BTW. I can only vent my spleen in prose. On the one hand, Morrison is entitled to a holiday (sorry, I refuse to buy into the Scomo schtick – that is no more than pandering to the PM’s pathetically needy ego and his attempt to craft a false persona). On the other hand, we also know he is a person who doesn’t like to be challenged. He believes he is a “chosen one” and he can’t abide anyone who doesn’t accept that – you can’t challenge Morrison on anything without being a blasphemer. He craves unequivocal and total veneration . When he knows he will be asked about climate change and he knows we don’t like his non-answers, his prototypic response is “flight”. We, the people, won’t ever know for sure, but Morrison the Messiah has form on this.

  5. Noel

    A great effort, but maybe you should also acknowledge A B Patterson for the mighty poetic framework.

  6. Anon E Mouse

    Is anyone really surprised.

  7. Patagonian

    Eek, that photo! He looks proud of his work.

  8. corvus boreus

    I bled salty tears to hear that my fellow strayans are still being nasty to each other on the twittersphere.
    I offer my thoughts and prayers to all those currently afflicted by twitter-burn.

  9. Paul

    The sad truth is it will rain eventually and the next election will come around and all will be forgotten,
    The Oil’s had it right all those years ago “short memories”.

    And that turd knows it……

  10. Kaye Lee

    The love of wealth and power,
    Of coal seam gas and mines,
    Of working without unions
    Or carbon output fines.
    Strong love of Gina Rinhehart,
    Murdoch and their IPA
    We recognise who’s talking
    When Scotty has his say.

    Scourge of my heart, my country!
    Being sold for a pot of Gold,
    For flood and fire and famine,
    Will now increase threefold –
    Over the burning forests,
    Watch, after many days,
    The smoky veil of pollution
    That thickens as we gaze.

    Scourge of my heart, my country!
    Ignoring the experts cry
    When sick at heart, around us,
    We see the planet die –
    But rather than take action,
    So we can breathe again
    You head off on a holiday
    While we must “pray for rain”.

  11. corvus boreus

    I love a mined out country,
    a land of tailings drains,
    polluted holes expanded,
    for base financial gain,

    Grey dusty moon-scaped craters,
    once wastes of ferns and trees,
    now rapidly enriching,
    investors overseas.

    Whilst to her far horizons
    (beyond the cotton channels)
    her sunlit plains extended,
    cry out for solar panels.

    (Ps, sorry Dorothy)

  12. Terry Riordan

    For a man who schemed so much and knifed so many people to get the job of PM he displays a remarkable lack of endurance and commitment . After only 6 months in the job he feels the need for a holiday despite the fact that the country is burning and we have major issues with drought and climate change
    If there was ever a chance for an aspiring leader to display leadership and inspiration this is it but this shallow and arrogant man prefers to take a holiday in Hawaii so l suppose it is well away from the smoke clouds that persist over NSW and won’t spoil his suposably well deserved break
    Of course the firefighters are still out there doing their best but it is rather obvious he has no wish to be anywhere near the frontline and it appears that he has outworn any welcome with his platitudes and prayers
    All very ” Trump ” like !!!
    Poor fellow … My country

  13. Michael Taylor

    Trish, Kaye, cb, well done to you all. Very good.

  14. Lambchop Simnel

    Maybe some good hash would shake him out of his stupid mid western WASP daftness.

  15. corvus boreus

    Dope is for beta cuck soybois.
    Real men roll with coal.

    ps, here’s some REAL poetry for ya;

    Our Future
    By G Reinhart

    The globe is sadly groaning with debt, poverty and strife
    And billions now are pleading to enjoy a better life
    Their hope lies with resources buried deep within the earth
    And the enterprise and capital which give each project worth
    Is our future threatened with massive debts run up by political hacks
    Who dig themselves out by unleashing rampant tax
    The end result is sending Australian investment, growth and jobs offshore
    This type of direction is harmful to our core
    Some envious unthinking people have been conned
    To think prosperity is created by waving a magic wand
    Through such unfortunate ignorance, too much abuse is hurled
    Against miners, workers and related industries who strive to build the world
    Develop North Australia, embrace multiculturalism and welcome short term foreign workers to our shores
    To benefit from the export of our minerals and ores
    The world’s poor need our resources: do not leave them to their fate
    Our nation needs special economic zones and wiser government, before it is too late.

  16. Kathryn

    MorriScum looks like he has vanished in a pall of smoke which HIS government’s climate-change-denying idiocy (in no small way) helped to CREATE! Sloth Morrison, in reality, has hardly worked a single DAY during his tenuous, destructive term as the laziest, non-achieving PM on record – his government has barely sat in parliament for weeks on end!

    The ShowMo Muppet appears that he now DESPERATELY needs a holiday after only 6 months of doing absolutely NOTHING! It now appears that he has rushed over to Hawaii to get his family OUT of the smoke-filled environment whilst the rest of us mere mortals remain HERE choking on the fruits of his government’s steadfast REFUSAL to address any issue relating to climate change! Now, we find out that MorriScum has rushed over to Hawaii to meet his paedophile-protecting mate, Brian Houston – the bible-thumping pastor of Hillsong – to hand over a rather generous donation of OUR taxpayer funds of more than $150K – I guess Brian Houston can add OUR taxpayer-funded donation to his personal net worth of $10 Million! To add insult to injury, the obsequious, fawning lapdog to Trump (that would be our ShowMo and his family) are being accommodated in one of Trump’s very expensive Hotels – Mmmmm, wonder what THAT is costing the Australian taxpayer?

    Hope you have a nice Christmas and New Year, MorriScum (NOT!) – try not to worry yourself about all those pesky volunteer firefighters who just WANT to be in amongst all those dangerous fires, beating down the flames, sucking up the smoke, risking their lives whilst they protect the property and lives of strangers instead of sharing a relaxing Christmas break with their loved ones! Don’t worry about them – just worry about YOURSELF and your multi-million dollar donors in the Top 1% …. Oh, hang on, you are already DOING that, eh?

    Don’t forget to kneel down and pray your black heart out in some Hillsong church on Oahu but somehow I think that God may choose NOT to listen to bible-thumping hypocrites, eh? One thing for sure, is that a rising number of Australians will NEVER forget the condescending contemptuous way you have treated Australians in our time of need! Nope, we won’t forget even whilst the discredited Murdoch media remains dead silent. Your favourite QUIET AUSTRALIANS are starting to rumble, MorriScum! Enjoy your Xmas whilst we just suck it up!

  17. whatever

    No news on our ABC, radio and TV, for 3 days now……except bushfires and how hot it is.
    No Angus Taylor or Robodebt news here.

  18. Old bloke

    If I could meet the PM face to face I would want to say to him:

    Scott Morrison, as a prime minister you are a disgrace and a hypocrite.
    Scott Morrison, as a professed Christian you are a disgrace and a hypocrite.
    Scott Morrison, as a man you are a disgrace and a hypocrite.

    I see this morning upon his return he is using the usual defence, being sorry for the offence he has caused, but not sorry for what he did which caused that offence. And where was Albo? Why did it take him so long to do what Morrison should have done and get to the fires to offer consolation and show signs of caring?

  19. Kaye Lee

    “If I can provide some moral support to those who are out there doing it tough, then that’s what I can do, and that’s what I’ll be very glad to do.”

    Moral support? How about some more firefighting planes? How about some action on climate change? How about meeting with the former fire chiefs who are pleading with you to listen?

    We don’t need your prayers. We don’t need your sycophantic ramblings on 2GB. We need you to do your job. Listen to the experts and take their advice.

  20. RomeoCharlie29

    There is a lot of “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” about polices being front and centre in disasters. Anna Bligh did it well. Jacinda Ardern seems to know how to do it well but bagging Albo out is a bit harsh as he’s only Oppo Leader. Of course no-one would be able to accuse Morrison of sincerity, even if a tear fell from his eye. Probably better that he continues to offer thoughts and prayers as they sort of fit his insincere, religious gobbledegook.

  21. DrakeN


    We do not have a proper opposition in Federal Parliament and have not had one following the sad drift into fundamentalist market based politics begun during PJ Keating’s time as Treasurer and then Prime Minister.
    That he has acknowledged such says much for the character of PJ as does the similar denouncement of the current Liberal Party by Malcolm Frazer.
    The Labour Party now sits on much the same kind of place on the left-right spectrum of politics as Bob Menzies and the Libs and Nats in a similar mode as the Russian Tsars.
    Even Scummo seems to have found his own reincarnation of the Mad Monk Grigori Rasputin.
    I fear for any kind of political/civil revolution in that the general population is sufficiently ignorant to instate a commoner as Emporer – like Boneparte – and slavish enough to accept another Stalinesque character to ‘lead’ them.
    “Sheeple” is such an appropriate epithet.

  22. New England Cocky

    @ Kaye Lee: “Moral Support”??? What about government funded workers compensation for RFS volunteer fire-fighters that the Gladly-back-flip-I-can Liarbral Nat$ misgovernment declined in their 2019 NSW Budget??

    Then what about the about 75% funding cut to NSW RFS operations in the 2019 NSW Budget??


    How about providing RFS volunteers with appropriate equipment for fighting these enormous ties, like the P3 masks to allow the fire-fighters to breathe at the fire front?


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