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We all need to put in, but not Tony when it comes to Putin.

A few months ago we were going to ban Mr Putin from G20. He wasn’t welcome.

But hey, who are we to go around banning people? God, it’s enough work to try and ban any discussion of climate change. After all, this is an economic forum and, as we all know, climate change has nothing to do with economics.

Besides, the G20’ll be a good opportunity for Tony to “shirtfront”Mr Putin.

We know because Mr Abbott told us this:

“I’m going to shirtfront Mr Putin..

“I am going to be saying to Mr Putin Australians were murdered.

“There’ll be a lot of tough conversations with Russia and I suspect the conversation I have with Mr Putin will be the toughest conversation of all.”

So what exactly is a “shirtfront”? Well, looking it on the internet could just lead to confusion because the definition given there is:

the breast of a shirt, in particular that of a stiffened evening shirt.

 

In the AFL, however, it refers to a solid bump to the opposition player which knocks him to the ground, so, if one presumes that one is not talking about the breast of an evening shirt, one presumes that our PM is planning to give Mr Putin a solid bump. Metaphorically speaking, one hopes, as actually physically bumping another leader could lead to all sorts of nasty things being said about Mr Abbott’s lack of political finesse, and his treatment of older people. After all, Mr Putin is in his sixties and while Joe Hockey would tell you that clearly Putin is fit enough to work for another thirty years, the photos of Abbott standing over an older opponent could be used for memes with captions to the effect that Costello lacked the ticker to do this to Howard.

So, a good solid metaphoric bump that knocks Mr Putin to the metaphoric ground, because Mr Abbott will give Mr Putin the toughest conversation of all – that’ll teach the Russian Embassy to remind everyone that Mr Putin does judo, while Mr Abbott rides bikes. And Mr Putin, being a Russian, won’t be used to us plain-speaking Aussies and will be quite shocked to be spoken to in such a rough way because nobody would have ever spoken roughly to Mr Putin during in his time in the KGB.

That is, unless he doesn’t happen to meet up with him, because according to the news report I just heard, there’s been no formal request from Australia for an actual bilateral meeting between the two, with Mr Abbott revising his position and now seems to be saying that if he happened to pass Mr Putin in the corridor, he’d go over to him and give him a jolly good talking to about how we didn’t like it when that plane went down and we think you had something to do with it, so you just better get out of the Ukraine right now or else, he’ll tell Peta Credlin and she’s really tough and she’ll come to Queensland and give him a Chinese Burn and she gives really good Chinese Burns that really hurt and all the backbenchers and ministers are afraid of her…

And if that doesn’t work, he’ll tell his mum.

But whatever, calling for Mr Putin to be banned… Well, that’s just juvenile!

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39 comments

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  1. John Fraser

    <

    THe moron Abbott will now, neither confirm nor deny "shirtfronting" took place.

    http://www.sunshinecoastdaily.com.au/news/robust-conversation-putin-not-shirtfront/2419356/

    It is now a robust .. robust …. robust …in fact 12 times "robust" ………. conversation.

    The fcuken moron couldn't even get the original script right : …."“Look, I’m going to … ahh … ‘shirt front’ Mr Putin. You bet you are… ahh … you bet I am. Ahh…” … ……you bet YOU are ?

    No wonder Credlin drinks.

  2. Pingback: Abbott just trying to remind us it was mental health week and 50% of us suffer an episode sometime in our lives. | olddogthoughts

  3. Kaye Lee

    “We would never have conducted the kind of megaphone diplomacy that Kevin Rudd and Julia Gillard have conducted with Indonesians.”

    -10 May 2013

    But that pussy Putin better watch out I’m telling me, no you, no him, …actually I’m just telling domestic press and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t actually quote me.

  4. Sir ScotchMistery

    I trust one of the half-wits flights won’t crash between here and the G20. No I don’t mean Putin. He’s just a dumb farmer. I mean the current occupant of the seat normally sat in by a prime minister.

  5. Matters Not

    Actually, Abbott’s paroxysms maybe a part of a cunning plot to boost the local tourist industry.

    It will soon be too embarrassing or dangerous to travel internationally with an Australian Passport.

    Better to stay at home and risk being beheaded with a toy, plastic sword wielded by a Shia adherent apparently motivated by a Sunni call to do just that. Who says inter faith cooperation isn’t possible? Hilarious!

    But it’s pleasing to see the really juvenile Abbott reveal his intellectual ‘spots’. Perhaps he will punch the wall near Putin’s head? Perhaps Putin will refer to the Chair as ‘IT’?

    Abbott hasn’t realised that Putin is a world leader, while he is just a follower.

  6. Möbius Ecko

    Unbelievable, really unbelievable.

    According to Abbott, Shorten is playing politics with the Putin thing.Yes Abbott projection on display again.

    As stated he yet again engaged his mouth before his tiny brain in a lame effort to be tough, and yet again within 24 hours had to back down and retract. Now he’s going to be robust x12, but even there a major back down. He will be robust x12 only if he has a private meeting that he hasn’t requested with Putin. But it’s up to Putin to talk to him in Australia, not for him to talk to Putin, after all he’s in Australia and Abbott is the PM of Australia so Putin has to seek him out, not the other round.

    This man is an utter joke.

  7. humanista8

    Actually, Rossleigh, as a lapse Catholic, I am able to inform you that shirtfronting is the Catholic Church sanctioned form of shirtlifting, because it can be undertaken in the missionary position. Shirtlifting, of course, albeit popular in seminaries (not that there’s anything wrong with that (apologies Seinfeld)) is strictly outlawed by the Church because it can never result in conception, as opposed to shirtfronting which almost invariably results in misconceptions.

  8. mars08

    Tonight, on The Project, Barry Cassidy was insisting that Abbott’s tough talk about “Russia’s responsibility for the downing of MH17” would have been cheered by “middle Australia”. He might be right…..

  9. stephentardrew

    I know Mars8 however that is why I blog here to keep way from the ning nongs.

  10. Bob

    With any luck Putin will just deck the arrogant prick.

  11. Peter F

    Putin would probably prefer to shirtfront Peta.

  12. mars08

    stephentardrew:

    …that is why I blog here to keep way from the ning nongs.

    I know what you mean. But such isolation can’t be healthy!

    Things around us are getting worse and I like to occasionally “lighten” my mood with some TV or a DVD. Unfortunately it doesn’t take much for me to realise that the vast majority of Australians live in a reality quite different to mine.

  13. Florence nee Fedup

    I suspect Abbott will be told by his betters, that there is protocol and conventions that have to be followed, Will be told, put a sock in it, and grow up. get on with the job.

  14. nurses1968

    With Abbott at his absolute worse I figured Independent media would have the chance to be at their absolute best in exposing him.
    Thankfully we have AIMN.
    I just checked out Independent Australia and can’t believe it.I wonder who has control of the asylum
    Keep up the great and inspiring work here, we need you

  15. Kaye Makovec

    🙂 🙂 🙂

    Think we’ve all seen the look Credlin gives the victim of that chinese burn. Terrifying!

    Can we put both ‘revered’ leaders in a cage to take it in turns shirtfronting each other until Abbott does another back flip, and sell tickets to the LNP supporters to raise money for the ABC?

  16. stephentardrew

    Mars8:

    Tis the price we pay for being thoughtful idealist. I live in two worlds theirs and mine and I have learned to mesh them together quite effectively. Sometimes I find it quite humorous absorbing facts while witnessing the circus go by. I have done more than my share in the welfare sector and can sit back and enjoy the ride warts and all. There are certain things that surf on subjective textures that cannot be rendered in common language. Art and creativity keep me sane.

  17. Anne Byam

    @ Florence Nee Fed-Up ….

    Abbott might well be told ( perhaps many times a week by disgruntled LNP backbenchers, and even some on the front bench [ cannot figure exactly who from that mob ] ….. to shut the HELL up, and behave like an adult !!! ( how old is he – 56 – almost 57 ? … going on 8 yrs of age – all apologies to 8 year olds ).

    Question is …. will he listen ? Of course he bloody won’t ….. he is after all the self appointed be-all and end-all of society – here and now overseas apparently.

    What he says goes. Wot a joke !!

    Got a newsflash for him …………. you ain’t all that crash hot popular Mr. Anthony John Abbott. In fact methinks you are in a cesspool of trouble – all over – in every sphere of your so-called ‘endeavours for the people of Australia’ and in the global diplomatic arena.

    And hey Florence …. “told by his betters ” ????? There ARE no betters – according to Anthony John Abbott, DH, LE, FW, GM of TA.

    The honors have not yet been bestowed …. they are being cast and molded as I speak !!! 😉

  18. mars08

    humanista:

    …as a lapse Catholic, I am able to inform you that shirtfronting is the Catholic Church sanctioned form of shirtlifting, because it can be undertaken in the missionary position. Shirtlifting, of course, albeit popular in seminaries (not that there’s anything wrong with that (apologies Seinfeld)) is strictly outlawed by the Church…

    That comment got me looking at this from another angle…

    And wow! OMG!!! How did we not see this before…???

    Consider…

    Abbott is a bit of an egotist. At the very least he’s quite self absorbed and self confident. Maybe he even loves himself. And if he loves himself, it stands to reason that he’d love others who are like himself.

    Soon there will be a meeting where two of the participants fancy themselves to be quite macho. Two manly-men who are not averse to stripping down. Two fit, virile men who have publicly stated that they are intimidated by homosexuals. But… above all… here are two hairy-chested action men… soon to be in the company of many other men.

    Yes, I know that Abbott wants middle Australia TO THINK that he is cross with Putin. And perhaps Abbott desperately wants to reject Vlad, but just can’t let go!

    Now… Abbott is waiting for Vlad and in his excitement, blurts out some words which are seen by many as quite unfriendly. Abbott gets flustered about how his words have been received and softens his tone. Clearly he is confused about his true emotions. So.. he then adds that if Vlad wants a meeting, he’s available. But he still insists publicly that any rendezvous will be robust.

    Our Tony his having some troubling feelings. He’s angry and excited and frightened all at the same time. I really hope those two can sort things out…

  19. Matters Not

    have learned to mesh them together quite effectively

    But how do you handle it affectively?

    That’s my problem. LOL

  20. stephentardrew

    Matters Not:

    Years of being a counselor and program manager helped. Dealing with craziness has certain rewards when you have to be calm in the face of pretty extreme violent threats. Either you learn detachment or have the shit beaten out of you. Helps to develop a kind of calmness in the face of threat. Becomes a personality trait after a while. Could have a genetic basis you know the old nature nurture thing. Research demonstrates its pretty close to fifty/fifty or sixty/forty depending on what you read.

    Mars8:

    That is truly wicked. There is so much psyche evidence to support your contention given certain contributing factors. Bloody brilliant.
    Please send it to MSM someone is bound to see the funny side.

    I would just love Frankenstein to read it.

  21. mars08

    stephentardrew:

    Mars8:

    That is truly wicked. There is so much psyche evidence to support your contention…

    It’s just a pity that… in order to protect their unbridled hard-man image, those two souls can’t show their real feelings for each other. There’s so much tension! Yes, it’s thrilling… but also quite tragic!

  22. CMMC

    Cage fight, Put-in by the KGB vs the Boxing Jesuit.

    Only on Foxtel.

  23. June M Bullivant OAM

    Most of the information and policy making from Canberra appears to be formulated by an eight year old bully, there is no common sense, no dignity, no creditability, no morals or ethics and certainly no respect or dignity.

  24. joannejasny

    Our PM is a tragedy, our government is a tragedy.

  25. David

    Our country is a train wreck and no sign of the track being cleared.

  26. Hotspringer

    No wonder Credlin drinks.Pure gold, John Fraser, pure gold.

  27. jimhaz

    With Abbott things are only going to get worse – though the economy might do OK due to the fact that Team Australia (those earning above 120k) will be both confident of LNP policy benefits and they will ensure the cooked books look good during this period.

    The longer people are in power the more egotistical and pathetic they become. Many of us would have felt quite happy with Hawke for his first term – but by the end the signs of increasing egotism made him into a goose. Excessive egotism killed off Rudd. Abbott’s shirtfront comment was a sign the egotism is building.

    Abbott has been PM for a little over 1 year. As Shorten, in my view, is almost working for the other side, Abbott will get two terms (the ALP opposition to cruel policies has been much lighter than it should have been). After the next election Abbott will be full of policies of fire and brimstone. Those ambit claims him and his team of Goebbels offspring were not allowed to implement will get through….and more.

    I just wish existing educational institutions would gang up and refuse to cooperate with his plans.

  28. Florence nee Fedup

    Except for the fact, Labor seems to be in a good place in the polls. This is not normal, on previous years. Keeping the focus on Abbott seems to be working.

  29. Rob031

    Does anyone know if Julie Bishop has been invited to express her opinion of Abbott’s ‘shirtfront’ statement?

    I’d love to hear her say “Well… er… I don’t think I’d put it in those terms“.

    I wonder if Hockey would be amused or even appreciate the irony 🙂

    (On second thought, maybe the question should be asked of Hockey as well!)

  30. stephentardrew

    Asbestos Warrior:

    I see nusing, I hear nusing, I taste nusing, I touch nusing, I do nusing I know nusing. (yeah thats right)

    What shirt front?

    Blank vacuous stare into the headlights of unknowingness learned from Dear Leader alias Captain Evil, Borat, Kim thingy Un, Frankenstein and as a gift to Johno Baldric.

    Oh please talk to me about Gucci and Armani so much more fulfilling and less stressful.

  31. Florence nee Fedup

    The betters I am talking about, are leaders of other countries. Ones whose words carry weight. No one on his side of politics seem to have the guts to stand up to Abbott or for their government.

  32. Kaye Lee

    Hockey could perhaps give Putin some tips about Tony’s technique since he was the recipient of a knockout punch from Tony at rugby training and they played for the same club. That’s Tony’s approach to everything. As he himself told us recently, sometimes you have to throw the first punch to be the best and fairest. Ask Barbara Ramjan.

    If this person had a boss, whether it be in private enterprise or the public service, he would be sacked for all sorts of inappropriate inadequate behaviour. The fact that he holds the highest office in the land is un-f*cking-believable. What sort of role model is this pusillanimous pugilistic pissant? What sort of representative is he? This is what happens when a child is told they are destined for greatness when they are saddled with mediocrity. He has always been out of his depth in every endeavour he has tried because he has an inflated sense of his own ability without the nous to back it up. Rat cunning is his only attribute, if you consider that an attribute. That makes him very vulnerable to manipulation which is probably why he was installed in the first place. Pander to his ego and you can get anything you want, provided you are in the top1% or can sign a free trade agreement – all he wants is a photo with you. But look at the body language in group situations, listen to the excruciating attempt at small talk – It’s humiliating.

  33. corvus boreus

    Kaye Lee,
    The PMs’ “pusillanious pugilistic pissantry”(dug dat 😉 ) is in keeping with his salacious recount of his emplying a cheating cowards’ low-blow during a rugby scrum as an example of exemplory conduct.
    I suspect if Tony is actually fronted by Vlad, we might see his paralysed goanna act (shake, glare/stare, nod, lick) again.
    Varanus tonii (var. ‘sesquiculus’)

  34. Kaye Lee

    I heard Tony this evening, when talking about how we have decided not to pay millions to Brisbane hotels to upgrade their rooms for the G20 leaders to stay two nights, that his “friend” Putin would no doubt find the Brisbane hotels adequate as they are for him to rest in after his “robust conversations”….. not that there are any one-on-one meetings booked of course so I am assuming it will be a Julie death stare across the room possibly accompanied by a raised eyebrow from Tone. Wonder if Tony will apologise to him for missing his happy birthday song in Bali and keeping the whole meeting waiting. Way to assert yourself Tone.

  35. mark delmege

    A couple of times this week the ABC news here in Perth has reported that Russian separatists downed the MH17. I did write to them urging them not to do so. This sort of propaganda shouldn’t be tolerated. It is a form of hate crime – just like all those false reports about the Syrian Government using chemical weapons – or last year when news reports and every tom dick or Fran reported that Iran had a nuclear weapons program.

    Most people, I dare say, now assume that these allegations are true. Such is the nature of perception management, propaganda and the ABeffingC.

    However I did read an interesting bunch of quotes from Lavrov at the UN – at least someone is making some sense… http://www.paulcraigroberts.org/2014/10/14/pardon-us-existing-lavrovs-september-27-2014-un-speech/

  36. David

    Mark commendable you writing to ABC . I have several times last few months, all with the same standard response as in ‘after carefully considering etc’ and ‘we do not find there has been a breach of the ABC Charter blah blah blah’
    I even copied to the Board, there standard response ‘ thankyou for your interest in ABC Programmes your complaint has been forwarded to the appropriate Senior Executive’…..in other words now go suck eggs.
    They are not interested in ordinary folks complaints.

  37. mark delmege

    Journalists who talk this talk, who write these stories and newswriters must be either downright stupid or corrupt. Given the recent history of corruption by outfits like the CIA in journalism I wouldn’t be surprises if some are taking a bunt to fix the news.

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