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Morrison Has A Vision Of A Chicken!

Why did the chicken cross the road?”

“It didn’t – it was just the light shining off its skin…”

If you haven’t caught up with the saga of Morrison and the raw chicken, it’s possibly the most important story of the election campaign and I wonder how he’ll recover from this gaffe…

Oh, ok, it’s not really that important but I’d thought that I’d build it up a bit because… well, if I’m ever going to get a job as political reporter for the Murdoch media I need to build my skills in hyperbole.

Speaking of hyperbole, I just loved Andrew Bolt’s complaint that Labor’s promise to build more EV charging stations was just helping out rich people charge their Teslas. Apart from the obvious ‘politics of envy” which he abuses people with whenever they complain about inequality, I wonder if he realises that there are many more options for EVs than Tesla these days.

But back to the evolving story of Morrison and the chicken. After a difficult week, Morrison likes to unwind and demonstrate his human side by showing us photos of the curry he’s cooked. We see the ingredients professionally laid out and we sometimes see him doing a selfie over the stove. We are meant to see this as him taking a break from his work and just relaxing. We’re not meant to be cynical and suggest that the only job he ever does is PR and this just more or the same because to do so would be very cynical indeed.

With the most recent shot, however, there was a minor problem. Someone pointed out that the chicken looked raw. Sometimes the best way to avoid being caught lying is to simply say nothing and hope nobody notices that there’s an unanswered question floating around. However, Morrison went full Colonel Jessop with his: “You want the truth? I CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!”, telling us that it was just the way that the light was bouncing off the skin of the chicken.

Mm, two problems here;

  1. A few people who were in the habit of cooking curries said that the picture appeared to be one of a chicken dish being marinated in yoghurt and garlic and that it wasn’t meant to be cooked at the time the photo was taken.
  2. The chicken piece was skinless.

Now this is a truly petty and trivial thing. I mean, who cares about the Prime Minister’s curries? Certainly not Jen and the girls. Josh Frydenberg might because they did share time at The Lodge where Josh washed and he dried… Or was it the other way around? Anyway, I wouldn’t bring up The Lodge with Josh at the moment because apparently he’s a bit touchy about the fact that this may be the closest he gets to it.

Anyway, leaving the touchiness of the Treasurer on certain subjects aside, it does make one wonder why on earth the Prime Modeller can’t simply point out that the chicken was raw because it hadn’t been cooked yet… Unlike himself and his Lodge buddy.

It’s almost like he didn’t know. It’s almost like he didn’t cook it. It’s almost like the whole thing was a bigger sham than his government.

Which reminds me… I noticed on Twitter that Frydenberg had a meme about Healthcare and it was in a colour that resembled the wonderful purple of the Australian Electoral Commission. I wondered if he had a version of it in Chinese telling people that the only way to vote was to put a “1” beside his name. I guess I’m allowed to ask that or will that – like any questions about Gladys Lui – be deemed racist. And, after all, the AEC doesn’t own the colour purple… Although I do believe there’s a shade that Cadbury have copyrighted so Josh better be careful.

 

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10 comments

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  1. The AIM Network

  2. Michael Taylor

    I’m looking forward to Scotty being served a huge plate of raw prawns.

  3. Pamela

    I am starting to wonder if (because he knows he will face multiple ICAC charges and perhaps even criminal charges) Morrison is deliberately manufacturing evidence he is completely delusional and totally mentally unstable. He will then plead he is unfit to face charges and can not be held responsible because he did not understand what he was doing. 🤣🤣

  4. Ng kid jui

    Well, we must choose the chicken, not the liar called Morrison!

  5. New England Cocky

    ”It’s almost like he didn’t know. It’s almost like he didn’t cook it. It’s almost like the whole thing was a bigger sham than his government.”

    Naughty Rossleigh!! You just cannot go around stating the obvious that the king has no clothes ….. somebody in Murdoch media-ocrity may run with it as a news flash.

    Michael Taylor: I think fishmongers will have another Christmas sales bonanza on the weekend of 21 May 2022.

    STOP THE LIES VOTE LABOR

  6. Albos Elbow

    He can’t play the ukulele or sing either, but when has that ever stopped this deceitful, arrogant, smirking prick.

    #GRoM

  7. david tennant

    ………..To see Gregory Peck!

  8. Florence nee Fedup

    The colour is wrong for a curry, is it not? Someone who says they cook this meal believes it is chicken marinating in ginger, garlic & yogurt. In other words, waiting to be cooked.

  9. Hotspringer

    What a MAN! A bot may chomp on raw onions, but Scummo feasts on raw chicken. Too bad he plucked it for the photo op, to show off its skin.

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