Crash and Burn

This is both optimistic and troubling. Fairfax media reports that "China has put…

The Admirable Demonstration of Dan Tehan And Other…

Apparently, Dan Tehan was on QandA last night. I only know this…

Condensed Fun Facts, Dates, Myths/Misconceptions

By Richard Whitington Fun Referendum Facts Fun Referendum Facts #1: The ballot paper for…

Cannabis: We can shut up, toe the line,…

When President Obama commented that he thought cannabis was likely less dangerous…

Corruption suspicions hang over secret PNG refugee contracts

Refugee Action Coalition Media Release AUSTALIA’S SECRET PNG DEAL MUST BE INVESTIGATED Refugee advocates…

Dianne Feinstein: National Security State Diva

The tributes for the late Democratic Senator from California, Dianne Feinstein, heaped…

Media Alert - Refugees Say "Fair Go, Albo"

A protest vigil will be held for 4 days at the electoral…

The Voice reveals the urgent need for truth…

The fact that Elon Musk has just halved his election integrity team…


From national embarrassment to personal humiliation

One man’s journey

”Luv, we all get taken out in a box.” (Paul Keating to Julia Gillard after she lost the leadership ballot to Kevin Rudd).

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.” (Bertrand Russell).

It is self-evident that anyone aspiring to be PM has a robust self-regard. Even the wiser ones harbour some illusions about their indispensability, but it is the bovine dullards and the zealots who despite all evidence to the contrary are the most convinced of their own exceptionalism. Overlay that conceit with an intransigent religious literalism and we have Tomás de Torquemada redux (sans the austere lifestyle but with the familiar sparse coif and man boobs) – a happy-clapping, prosperity gospelling mutation of that Old Testament fantasist Mad Abbott where their shared dogma is righteousness (theirs) vs the unworthy (check for daily specials). Government to them was a comforting, authoritarian patriarchy where the womens do the ironing, grateful they’re not shot when they get a bit toey (but they are useful for explaining the nuances of rape. Not good according to Jen). And it’s where the flock need not trouble themselves with the Godly mission of the annointed one.

He was a smug windbag, a smirking oaf who lost a staring competition with an electric arc welder and who thought it a good idea to publicly wash the hair of a stranger – a laying on of hands for a retinue of obsequious press flacks to help cultivate an image of not-a-weirdo.

He believed his guile had his deity’s imprimatur – further evidence that the worst people are commonly those affectedly professing their godliness. Having a God whose interests always align with your own is a self-sustaining contrivance – ‘because I have God’s favour everything I do is God’s will’. Quite useful whether you’re burning heretics, brutalising toddler asylum seekers or steering Covid vaccines away from a Labor-oriented state.

He thought of himself as special. Not just the smartest guy in the room but on a mission from his God who showers the pious with earthly wealth but has little sympathy for the poors or the non-believers – a convenient celestial licence to intimidate, silence and persecute.

Bad things only happen to bad people according to the handbook for Jesusing neoliberals:

There shall no evil happen to the just: but the wicked shall be filled with mischief” Proverbs 12:21.

The Public Service was told to unquestioningly toe the line, the AFP raided the ABC, universities were nobbled, whistleblowers were prosecuted, welfare recipients were demonised and harassed while wealthy fridge magnates, party mates and the temples of Yahweh wallowed in buckets of public largesse – no strings attached.

Endorsement from the ethereal realm also over-rides the scientific method. Voices from burning bushes prevail over the observable phenomena of quantum mechanics, expert concensus of pending ecological collapse are ignored because, ya know, the Rapture. Selective, credulous acceptance of biblical contradictions facilitates literal beliefs in comical superstitions that excuse all sorts of bad behaviour – persecution of non-conformers being an historical favourite. It also dispenses with any need for accountability to anyone other than a omniscient, omnipotent yet paranoid phantasm whose tantrums kill millions. The Oaf’s whole Jesusing routine was more than just a PR ruse; he truly believes that secularists are ungodly heretics to be re-educated or reviled.

“Australia is not a secular country… As US Senator Joe Lieberman said, the Constitution guarantees freedom of religion, not freedom from religion. I believe the same is true in this country.” (From his maiden speech to Parliament).

He was fully onboard the 7 Mountains Mandate looney train, at least in spirit (no pun intended).

He facilitated the infiltration of fellow pulpit pushers and the punishers and straighteners of the anti-gay/anti-trans bigots and he sought succour through fellow fabulists – flight risk Brother Stuie and personal bag carrier and co-conspirator Alex Hawke.

He has not introduced one single policy of benefit to this nation – indeed he has failed to even articulate any vision or forethought beyond politicking. During his tenure the country has not progressed in any way – going backwards in most international rankings.

His incompetence, the vindictive nastiness, government as a manelovent force, the hypocritical piety, the cultivation of division, the rampant cronyism and graft, the secretiveness and intolerance of dissent, the five ministries megalomania, the incoherent gibberings designed to frustrate enquiry, the bullying, the tearing down of conventions and standards, the denigration of expertise – the whole horrendous revivalist circus of the worst PM in our history; a national embarrassment who is deserving of the most humiliating removal from our consciousness.

Serial fuck-ups and the application of the smirk removal cream of public approbrium for his failures and his facile, dress-up brand management failed to dent the impervious narcissism of belief in his own ‘genius’ and self-image as a ‘master strategist’. His shamelessness has survived his ostracism to the opposition backbenches where his unemployability stands out like a hi-vizzed walrus at a choir practice – the guy whose smarm included “if you’re good at a job you’ll get a job“, the guy who initiated the dob-in-a-bludger hotline. This is schadenfreude tied in a big, pink bow.

The denigration from his Tory cohort was shrugged off:

He fucked us and his fingerprints are absolutely fuckin’ everywhere on that. The bloke thinks he is a master strategist. He is a fuckwit.” (Anonymous federal Lib MP).

Everyone wants him to piss off. But people don’t want a by-election,’’ a senior Liberal source told (Julia Banks, ex Lib MP – “menacing controlling wallpaper”).

Catherine Cusack ex Lib MP – “… it’s just all come a bit late for the Liberal party. The party I joined 40 years ago and loved. The party he has ruined.

Concetta Fierravanti-Wells – an autocrat [and] a bully who has no moral compass,He has used his so-called faith as a marketing advantage.”

Gladys Berejiklian – “a complete psycho”.

His appearance before the Robodebt Royal Commission elicited humbug not humility.

It took 330 years before Torquemada’s remains were dug up and belatedly burned auto-da-fé. The NACC may be a more timely seal on The Oaf’s deserved humiliation but I doubt we’ll see any genuine contrition.


In 2007, Howard repealed the Parliamentary Pension scheme. This means that he is not entitled to any pension besides his 15.4% Public Service super than cannot be accessed before he turns 65 . Bwahahahahaha!


Me: Who will I transfer my loathing to once this prick is levered off the public teat?

Spud: G’day.

This article was originally published on Grumpy Geezer.

Like what we do at The AIMN?

You’ll like it even more knowing that your donation will help us to keep up the good fight.

Chuck in a few bucks and see just how far it goes!

Your contribution to help with the running costs of this site will be gratefully accepted.

You can donate through PayPal or credit card via the button below, or donate via bank transfer: BSB: 062500; A/c no: 10495969

Donate Button


Login here Register here
  1. Phil Pryor

    Digging up this stinking political corpse is revolting and irritating enough, but he is still there, bloodsucking parasite..Freud would demand, surely, a premium for commenting on so distateful an object/patient. .Morrison remains, forever, a stick of faecality, coated in same, and then deep fried in more to guarantee long life and eternal putridity. There is no god out of Rome, Canterbury Cathedral, Mecca, Beijing, Delhi, the Pentagon, Disney, Wall St., Trump’s orifices, UNO, Musk, anywhere, to justify, amplify, explain, forgive, illustrate, analyse this reeking brown logdropping from some cursed sty.., Morrison the Misfit.

  2. Canguro

    Impossible to add to the analyses of the correspondents Grumpy Geezer and Phil Pryor. Deeply relevant commentary, and a salient warning to anybody who ever enters a polling booth in future electoral events; take an extra minute or two to very carefully consider who you’re voting for – pay attention to their backgrounds and public statements… if there’s even a whiff of horseshit hanging about them, it’s likely that if elected it’ll turn into a crapfest of utterly regrettable proportions. We’ve seen the horror… let it never be repeated.

  3. John mccloy

    A permanent embarrassment and an occasional disgrace.

  4. Henry Rodrigues

    Thanks Grumpy for reminding us of the utter relief we the longsuffering people felt when this putrid piece of shit was finally tossed out of the lodge. His erstwhile colleagues might still acquire some balls and toss him out of the parliament and spare the taxpayers the burden of supporting the creep any longer.

  5. leefe

    At long last, a depiction of ScoMoFo I can come back to repeatedly with blissful enjoyment. Thank you, Alan Moir.

    ” … expert concensus of pending ecological collapse are ignored”

    Nah, it wasn’t ignored. It was taken as a sign that they were on the right track and bringing their rapture ever closer. For Schmo and his fellow travellers it was encouragement.

  6. JulianP

    Difficult to add anything more of substance to your summary Grumpy, except perhaps the empty exhortation: “If you have a go you will get a go”. Another wit noted at the time: “Free goes, apply within”.

  7. Terence Mills

    Barnaby Joyce didn’t hold back when he described Scott Morrison thus :

    “He is a hypocrite and a liar from my observations and that is over a long time.

    “I have never trusted him and I dislike how he earnestly rearranges the truth to a lie.”

    Malcolm Turnbull said of Scott Morrison :

    Mr Turnbull said Mr Morrison had lied to him multiple times when they worked together in the Coalition.

    You already know what the French President Macron thought of Morrison.

    I am surprised that the electors of Cook are not demanding that he resign – he lied to them too !

  8. Roswell

    Another classic, GG. How do you do it?

  9. Canguro

    Terence Mills, you’re a Queenslander of the upper reaches… perhaps the readings of the chicken entrails don’t permeate that far north.

    re. “I am surprised that the electors of Cook are not demanding that he resign”, fat chance, unfortunately.

    From Wiki; “As of the 2019 federal election, it is the safest metropolitan Coalition seat, with a 19-point swing needed for Labor to win it.”

  10. wam

    It is so sad that workers cannot be retired they will be welfare recipients.
    Bring on a DD and sink the bastard.

  11. wam

    It is so sad that workers cannot be retired they will be welfare recipients for the rest of their lives.
    Bring on a DD and sink the bastard.

  12. Paul Smith

    Far canal! How good was that!? Better than sex. Move over Bloom’s Day. Let’s gather in pubs on 21st May forever more to share reading this piece aloud and marinate in phrases like “… his unemployability stands out like a hi-vizzed walrus at a choir practice.”

    Just one thing, but. “… the worst PM in our history …” Equal worst, I’d say. Surely it can’t be that Abbott was a “better” PM than Morrison. God forbid! as that say at 6 am every Sunday morning on the ABC (RN).

  13. K

    I think I found the “public servants will do what they’re told” speech most offensive…. The APSC one…

  14. New England Cocky

    GG & PP say it all.

  15. Max Gross

    The fecker is STILL there!

  16. GL

    Waah! Waah! None of it is my fault. Waah! Waah! Stop picking on me, I’m the innocent party in the whole matter. I didn’t do anything, see my halo is still there over my head. I just want to be left alone to continue to gorge from the pig trough in peace.”

    Could he be looking to changing his brown trousers for a new pair as he sees the possibility (although all I see ultimately is a slap on the wrist) that he may be further implicated in the racket he set up?

  17. Canguro

    Speculating wildly, but per Scott Morrison’s huge dummy spit in parliament where he denied ever doing anything wrong, said the Royal Commissioner – a retired judge, fer chrissakes – had got it wrong, said that he was being subjected to a political lynching, said that all things were legal and fair and above board, said he should receive a knighthood for his unswerving loyalty and service to the Australian public and recognition for his utter honesty in all things and humility in recognition of the privilege of serving as the country’s dedicated leader in recent trying times of disaster – fire & flood – and his non-partisan support & empathy for all those affected (nah, made the last two bits up), it occurred to me that perhaps Jen & the girls sooled him on.

    He would have been sulking around the house for the last month or so, his bottom lip dragging on the floor, refusing to cook any more curries, to play with the kiddies, to feed the chooks, not even watching the footy after Cronulla threatened to kick him out of the club, along with moaning & groaning about what a pain in the arse it was having to show up in Canberra when everyone hates him and gives him the side-eye like that wretched Grace Tame woman did, in short, behaving like the utter dickhead that he is, a man-baby immersed in a narcissistic fog and fully committed to his make-believe version of reality, and it would have been unbearable, even for a woman such as Jen who one might assume is nowhere near the idiot that her partner is, and such being the case she may well have said, ‘Scott, if it bothers you so much, just go in there and tell them they were wrong. Get it off your chest. You’ll feel better afterwards.’

    And he did. He’s that stupid, non self-conscious, unreflective, thick-headed. And thus confirmed in the minds of all who either witnessed it or saw it in the news what a boorish moron the man actually is.

  18. leefe

    Of course, “Jen and the girls”. Why blame the man for his own shortcomings when you can blame a woman and two children?

  19. Canguro

    It’s satire, leefe, fer chrissakes! Jeez, please try to reinvigorate your funny bone. I’m no more blaming “Jen & the girls” than I’m insinuating that Scotty from Marketing is being unfairly done by. Being stuck on your high horse clearly doesn’t afford you the wider vision that ought to accompany that position.

    And in classical Morrisoninan alternate reality redux; he today suggested that the Royal Commission was a ‘quasi-legal’ process…. nothing surprising from a guy whose life has been dedicated to spinning fairy floss tales from the bottom of the garden.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

The maximum upload file size: 2 MB. You can upload: image, audio, video, document, spreadsheet, interactive, text, archive, code, other. Links to YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and other services inserted in the comment text will be automatically embedded. Drop file here

Return to home page
%d bloggers like this: