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Bolt, Turnbull, and why Bronwyn Bishop should consider being called Delores Umbridge a compliment

Dolores Umbridge: [to Harry] As I told you, Mr. Potter, naughty children deserve to be punished.

* * *

“Sell, sell, sell, sell everything you stand for
Tell, tell, tell, tell all the people that you care for
Running here, running there
Keep it moving, sonny, don’t despair
Because the next one will be, the next one will be, the next one will be, the best one of the year”

Sell, Sell, Sell

Alan Price

* * *

Well, I guess some of you haven’t read Harry Potter. Or watched Bronwyn Bishop’s wonderful impersonation in her role as Speaker.

Let’s be fair. Bronwyn has always suffered from NEAS or Not Enough Attention Syndrome. Remember that she started out as a Senator, but changed to the Lower House in order to become Leader. Yes, she was going to become the first female Prime Minister. No wonder she hates Labor. They took that away from her by giving Julia Gillard her birthright. Well, at least she can still get an award for the best performance as an impersonator of Dolores Umbridge.

However, the performance of the week has to go to Andrew Bolt. Or should that be performance of the weak?

Amazingly, he managed to improve Turnbull’s standing with just about everyone. Let’s be real. Turnbull, to quote Bolt, is “on the far Left of the Liberal Party, charming a constituency that hates Abbott”. (Mm, the far Left of the Liberal Party??? Sort of like those far Left Nazis in World War 2? I know, I know, Godwin’s Law.)

So, let’s take a step back for a second. How dare he try to “charm” a constituency that hates Abbott when he should be out “selling” the Budget!

“Get your Budget here, half price. Come on, discount Budget, going cheap.”

We shouldn’t be trying to “charm” people. Unless they don’t hate Abbott. Turnbull should be like the rest of the government and try to win over those who agree with Abbott.

He should be selling.

But I guess that’s what it gets down to. Abbott and Bolt and so many of the Liberals don’t seem to understand that he’s Prime Minister, not the CEO of some company. He doesn’t have a legal obligation to make a profit. Or even a moral one. While it may be ok for the CEO of a company to say that we can make certain departments redundant because they aren’t contributing to the overall profit of the company, it becomes a little bit harder to do that as Prime Minister. “Unemployed people under thirty create a loss on their balance sheet.”

Of course, they could get work. After all we had one member of the government suggesting that people should go to Tasmania, while another suggested that Tasmanians should be prepared to move to the mainland. All this moving around should create a travel led recovery.

“Get your no frills, no extras Budget here. Come on, we’ve eliminated welfare, Medicare, pension rises, anything fair. We’ve uncapped uni fees, because that’ll allow competition to drive them down, whereas currently, the cap on the maximum they can charge stops them competing for students.”

Little did I know with my leadership speculation a few weeks ago (It’s a plan, Jim but not as we know it…) – because Malcolm had posed wearing a Hi-viz vest – would make it spread so quickly. So, when I suggested last week, that Turnbull’s meeting with Palmer may have had something to with leadership aspirations, a few Liberal supporters were dismissive, suggesting that there was nothing wrong or sinister about a couple of politicians sharing a banana after a tender duck. However, now that Andrew Bolt has decreed it, we all need to remember what a dangerous man that Malcolm is. “Far left of the Liberal Party”? Why that’s nearly as bad as that other far left millionaire Phillip Adams. And he’s a “friend of the ABC” too. God, if he wasn’t an MP, he’s could be charged with treason.

And all this, too, when the attention should be on Mr Abbott’s overseas trip where he’s off to sell D-Day, where our troops stood side by side with people from Canada, France and the USA to defeat the Germans who were trying to impose a carbon tax. Thankfully though, the forces of freedom won and Australia is now open for business.

Ok, I know that some of you will tell me that I shouldn’t talk about Bolt because it’s better to give him no publicity at all and that any publicity helps him. I can understand that point of view. Which is why I wonder why Bolt chose to make such a big thing about Turnbull’s meeting. If you wanted to close down speculation, wouldn’t have been better just to say nothing at all at this stage? Perhaps like a shadow puppet play, we shouldn’t be watching the puppets – perhaps we should concentrate on the shadows.

“Last chance Budget. We’ll do deals. Yes, that’s right – we’ll do deals. No price is too ridiculous.”

P.S. Couldn’t help notice that in an interview on his “Drive” show, Rafael Estein suggested to Graham Morris that these few weeks after the Budget had been Tony Abbott’s worst as Opposition Leader. Morris commented but didn’t seem to notice the mistake. In fact, I don’t know that even Tony has realised that he’s no longer Opposition Leader.


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  1. Nuff Said

    Hey Ross, is the title meant to read like that? It’s doing my head in 🙂

  2. Rossleigh

    The answer is “Possibly” as this is my first post on the new website. I had a few problems publishing it, and I’ve no idea how it appears…

  3. jimhaz

    Bolt is probably just playing the “distract from the budget” game. They couldn’t find anything positive to use, so they’ll use this.

  4. Fed up

    Yes, he is taking his business men. I note we all say men. I do not believe today

    I believe that Indonesia was not on the agenda. In fact, it was added so late, that the media where already on their way to France. None are in Indonesia.

    It is like Abbott has been summoned by the headmaster, telling him if he wants to re enter the class, he better get up there quickly, and sign that code of conduct.

    Why is this trip overseas taking a fortnight. After all, he is only going to France, on to Canada and the USA.

    Lyndal Curtis just asked the Defence Minister if he was in danger o losing his job, Already I believe has a falling out with one defence head. If one watch the senate hearings, one could not but help see the body language of the officials sitting beside him,. A ruder and more arrogant man, one would be hard to find.

    We have Truss in Abbott’s seat. Should be interesting.

  5. Kaye Lee


    I actually have a little information on that. It came from senior government officials off the record (truly).

    Very few of you will know that there is an international climate change conference going on in Bonn as we speak.

    “For the first time at a June session, there will be a ministerial level meeting designed to provide guidance, confidence and further impetus for governments working on their national contributions to the new, universal climate change agreement in Paris in 2015. Ministers will also meet to advance implementation of the second commitment period of the Kyoto Protocol, and to accelerate other emission reduction efforts.”


    As far as I know, Greg Hunt isn’t attending…he has feral cats to deal with.


    We are however sending some poor public servants who have been tasked with saying “NO” to anything that appears like a commitment to action on climate change. I feel so sorry for these people who are forced to defend the indefensible and to appear like idiots to their international colleagues.

    But the really galling thing is that the PMs office – ie Peta Credlin – has “allegedly” put a cap on any overseas trip by DFAT. Anything above $50,000 has to have her approval. So when the delegates prepared to go to Bonn, Peta hadn’t got that far through her pile of control edicts to give approval so they were stuck rationalising who could go and for how long to stay under the approval cap.

    Meanwhile, Tony finds room to take his coterie of the chosen business leaders with him – not sure who pays but I could guess. Germany is next door to France. Couldn’t we have bumped a few business people and journalists to take the public servants who actually are there to do some work for the country?

  6. Stephen Tardrew

    Bolt is doing one thing he is selling the Bolt campaign. He just plays to his audience who love the twisted little ferret. Apologies to ferrets. Malcolm or Tony they are just stooges in his right wing arrogant, I am never wrong, wacko mind. I wonder if he sees the irony in calling Turnbull a leftist. Nah beyond him.

    I think you uncovered, and disclosed, the angry Bee Bonnet to a tee.

    And now she has to genuflect to Pyne. She don’t see the irony either.

    Comedy Central. Who needs John Oliver.

  7. Anomander


    As much as we desperately need to be represented at major climate conferences like this. I’m not sure we need the sideshow Abbott creates wherever he goes.

    It’s embarrassing to have a clown like him representing all of us on the world stage.

  8. DanDark

    next 3 word slogan for libs


  9. Anomander

    Wow! I just made a comments about Abbot being a clown in a sideshow and the most recent article from John Kelly is titled “What a Circus!”.. Wondrous synchronicity.

  10. Kaye Lee

    Anomander, Abbott never had any intention of going but we are really annoying the rest of the world by never sending any politicians and leaving the public servants who do go (admirable people I might add) hamstrung.

  11. Stephen Tardrew

    He cannot fight the science or facts. This is one hell of a double edged sword which is going to come back to bite him big time.
    Elnino back this year. Think it’s been hot. You ain’t’ seen nothin yet. Apparently it is really intense so hang on for the politic ride. I know that weather is not climate but a good dose of drought is going to screw this troglodyte. He is in for a caning on climate change and will go down as an incompetent ignoramus. The sooner the better.

  12. Winifred Jeavons

    Surely this mob will claim that all fires ,floods, droughts or cyclones are the result of the last government’s actions , like the carbon tax . Their only consistency is in this mantra.

  13. DanDark

    Are we behind censored now like on msn?

  14. CatCalling

    Did I see that when Abbott’s flight was delayed today, he actually blamed the Labor party? If only it weren’t true, it would be hilarious!

  15. Don Winther

    Abbott is out selling his Bugatti …….. Oh sorry you wrote “selling his Budget!” Didnt think he would sell anything of his own.

  16. ShaunJ

    G’day All,

    Kaye Lee (June 4, 2014 at 3:05 pm), I was a public servant for several decades, and if I was sent to Germany (deliberately hamstrung) to represent Australia, I would be hard put not to ignore instructions and sign us up to commit to realistic objectives to tackle climate change, it would cost a career, but would be delightful watching this moribund mob of monsters squirming and blustering to backtrack on said commitments. My hope is that there is someone brave enough in the contingent.

    Cheers ShaunJ

  17. corvus boreus

    Not censored, Dandark, just frisked 😉

  18. Florence nee Fed up

    Cormann not doing too well at Senate Hearings. Wrong ignores him, and goes on with her questioning.,

    In this budget there are not graphs showing how the budget affects many groups. There are no comparisons, as in previous budgets. It was not treasury that took them out.

    Cormann says comparison with Europe are misleading. Yes, we impart borrowing since Federation it seems.

    Cormann keeps giving speeches, while officials try to answer,

    Cormann is talking over his officials, discrediting what they have to say.,

  19. DanDark

    Thanks for that info Florence
    Corman is a lot of the problem
    He is a right wing extremist from Belgium originally
    I hope he goes down, like a turd in a long drop dunny 🙂

  20. Florence nee Fed up

    Believe me, he does not look too smart tonight., Nor does the defence minister or Brandis.

    All are useless, when one has to answer questions, with facts not slogans.,
    I thought Cormann did have some intelligence, even if misplaced,. After tonight, I am sorry to say, I was wrong. Has not even the sense to shut up.,

  21. Florence nee Fed up

    DAnDArk, did you know, he was bought up on charity. Unbelievable

  22. DanDark

    I know more about corman, than corman knows about corman
    He is no good, a bad apple, he is as thick as ten bricks
    If he has to string 3 sentences together without pre rehearsing
    He is stuffed, and it’s showing through tonight
    All Braun, no brains, and one of the masterminds behind hockey’s budget
    He is dangerous and a sadist

  23. Carol Taylor

    Florence and, All are useless, when one has to answer questions with facts not slogans

    As evidenced by the fact the number of times they get it wrong..and Pyne and statements about the impact of the GP co-payment come to mind.

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