Ok, you’ve all seen the photos/video of the ex-Deputy Prime Minister demonstrating his skill in answering a phone while prostrate… It’s not as easy as it looks.
There have been comparisons to Sir Les Paterson by some, while others are using the cheap joke that this is unfair on poor Sir Les who managed to remain upright.
Let’s be clear here, we shouldn’t be making jokes about someone who’s so pissed that they can’t stand up. Alcohol is a serious problem. We need to acknowledge that. As Barnaby himself said:
“You have to be honest about the source. About 40 to 50 per cent of the problem is alcohol. If you don’t want to call it that then I don’t know what you want to say. It’s fairies at the bottom of the garden, it’s the alignment of the planet. No, it’s people chasing grog…”
Well, he was talking about Alice Springs but I think he does make some very valid points.
Just like when he called himself a “dead f@cking c#nt” while talking to his wife on the phone. I’m adding the symbols because I’m quoting directly from a couple of the papers and I don’t want to be accused of misquoting the man. Anyway, according to his partner, Vikki Campion, he “likes to self-flaggelate”… which goes a long way toward explaining his presence in Parliament when he asserts that he’d rather that government just get out of our lives.
She was also quoted as saying: “I’ve been with Barnaby when we have found a man in the same state on the street and rather than take a video and sell it to the media, he picked the guy up and took him home.”
Now, while I have no wish to disparage the couple’s Good Samaritan act, I don’t know that a federal politician and their partner filming someone lying in the street and trying to sell it to the media is the sort of thing that’s liable to lead to favourable media coverage, so it’s not really an option.
Just for clarity, I should explain that Barnaby’s predicament was caused by a simple accident where he wasn’t concentrating and walked into something he didn’t see: the ground. Once there, he decided that it was better to continue to talk on the phone rather than get up because, as anyone with a degree in Psychology knows, multitasking is a myth.
Now there have been a number of reactions from his colleagues but basically they’re saying that it’s a reflection on modern society that the person filmed it because whenever they find Barnaby self-flagellating on the ground their first reaction is not to reach for their phone and film it; their first reaction is to offer assistance… I presume that’s assistance in standing up and not in the flagellating department…
This whole incident just shows how unfair society is. Anyone else would have probably been given free accommodation in a police cell while poor Mr Joyce was left to fend for himself in the cold Canberra night.
We need to remember that Barnaby is “one of the best retail politicians” in the country so I’m sure he can be forgiven for a misdemeanour like this and I’m sure that he’ll be back to campaigning in no time…
Not in Dunkley, obviously because the Nationals won’t be standing a candidate there, and so the Coalition will have to do without the unique skills of Mr Joyce who recently called wind farms “filth” asserting that they’re not farms but factories, prompting most people to wonder if he considers coal-fired power stations farms or factories.
Even without Mr Joyce, the Liberals are still a good chance of being able to spin the result in Dunkley favourably. After all, after a week of Dutton and his cohorts telling everyone that Albanese’s broken promise would finish him, Simon Benson managed to write an article about how Newspoll had stayed the same and the tax cuts hadn’t given Labor a bounce in the polls.
Similarly with Dunkley, at this moment in the electoral cycle with the cost of living issues, the lack of rate relief from the RBA, the loss of a personal vote for Peta Murphy after her death and the broken promise attacks, you’d have to think that anything less than a win would be bad news. However, I suspect that any swing away from the government will suddenly be perceived as a massive plus for Dutton and we’ll hear something like one of the following from Bridget McKenzie’s partner:
“Excellent result, Dutton managed to get something like the average swing for a by-election and that’s hard when you have by-election caused by a tragedy like this.”
Or, in the unlikely event that Labor increase their majority, we’d get:
“Great result under the circumstances when you have a government throwing money at the public! They’ve obviously been blinded by the bribe of tax cuts and it’ll take a while for the government’s dishonesty to bite in the suburbs.”
Whatever, in three weeks’ time we’ll have Samantha Maiden and/or Phil Coorey on “Insiders” telling us that Labor’s refusal to announce any plans on negative gearing is enabling the Coalition to frighten people with a scare campaign about Labor’s plans for negative gearing and so they’d better say something that we can say that people won’t believe them so they’d be better saying nothing rather than giving Dutton ammunition by saying something!
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