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Adani To Go Announces Its Intention To Continue Announcing Deadlines…

Every now and then The Australian Financial Review has an article that gives me a good laugh.

Ok, it’s behind a firewall so I can’t give you a link but today’s article about Angus Taylor begins:

“Energy Minister Angus Taylor has slammed greenhouse gas reduction policies as “corporate greed dressed up as saving the planet” while a key ratings agency warned the government-created vacuum in energy policy was putting reliable energy supply at risk by delaying investments in on-demand generation.”

Apparently, it’s only thanks to those philanthropic coal barons that we’re going to get lower energy prices. Meanwhile, Melissa Price, the Minister for Environment or something unimportant, is looking to continue Tony Abbott’s Direct Action policy. This is the policy where we give the worst polluters money and ask them to stop making as much mess with their emissions. It’s rather like the policy where people pay criminals large amounts of money and in return the criminals don’t set their business on fire. The only difference is that criminals actually keep their end of the bargain.

Mr Taylor has the backing of ScoBro who told us:

“Angus is bringing back a package of things right now to see how we can get greater investment in what I call fair dinkum power, that’s the stuff that works when the sun doesn’t shine and wind doesn’t blow.”

Personally I suspect that the day “the sun doesn’t shine” we’ll all be in a lot of trouble, but hey, I just love that they’re trying to get greater investment in “fair dinkum” power. Bloody bonza, mate. This is more important than a few sheilas being bullied, eh? God, if you can’t stand the heat, get back to the kitchen where youse belong.

Ok, that was just a little audition in case Scooter Morrison needs a speech writer. It’s a job I wouldn’t mind because – at my age – I don’t like taking on long-term jobs, prefering short term contracts.

But speaking of fair dinkum things. Did anybody notice that Adani missed their funding deadline again? No? Well, they did. You see, Adani keep giving themselves a deadline for getting funding and when they don’t, they give themselves a new deadline. It reminds me of a friend I once I had who kept announcing their deadline for giving up smoking. The only difference was that the friend did occasionally stop smoking for a few weeks before announcing his new deadline. Still to give the guy his due, he hasn’t had one since his funeral.

Well, Adani may not be able to get funding, but they can get water. I know that there’s drought, but our PM is praying for rain so it should be no problem that Adani is given 12.5 billion litres of water without an environmental impact assessment .

I mean, who needs an environmental assessment when a coal company’s involved? They’re not the ones “virtue signalling”. Their ads are just reminding us that coal is good for humanity and that they only mine it to provide jobs for people.

So any day now I’m expecting one of two things:

  1. Adani will announce that they’re deadline for funding is March 2019.
  2. Scott Morrison will announce that they’ll lend Adani the money as part of their plan to reduce energy prices.

Yes, number 2 would be one of the stupidest decisions ever made by a political party, but we are talking about one who allowed Tony Abbott to be Minister for Women and whose signature policy was paid parental leave because, as we all know, babies are the only thing that matter to ladies.

The policy, like Tony, was eventually abandoned.

 


10 comments

  1. Andrew Smith

    Good post, more evidence of the Orwellian double speak that (mostly) ‘owned’ Conservatives are compelled to use:

    “corporate greed dressed up as saving the planet”

    However, it serves a purpose i.e. creates confusion in punters’ minds.

  2. Rossleigh

    Yeah, I wonder about their sudden discovery of the notion of corporate greed… how does it fit with jobs and growth!

  3. Kerri

    “Angus is bringing back a package of things right now to see how we can get greater investment in what I call fair dinkum power, that’s the stuff that works when the sun doesn’t shine and wind doesn’t blow.”

    I suspect ScoBro thinks this would be solved if he just bends and aims in the right direction??

  4. Kaye Lee

    I listened to the GBRF officials answer Senate Committee questions today about why they were given half a billion and what they were going to do with it and whether there was a conflict of interest between saving the reef and their connection to the fossil fuel industry.

    Quite frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised if they helped Adani out. The chairman? kept saying they are focusing on reef adaptation rather than climate change mitigation but that our coal was cleaner so sending it to India was actually helpful – go Adani!

    “We have only have one customer – it’s the reef,” they assure us over and over. The repetition smacks of PR talking points.

    Dr Schubert said the foundation “recognised very openly that climate change is the greatest threat to our Great Barrier Reef”.

    Despite this, he said it was not the foundation’s place to take political positions on other projects that could contribute to climate change, including the proposed Adani Carmichael coal mine in Queensland.

    Perhaps they can “leverage some funds” for, rather than from, the Galilee hopefuls.

  5. New England Cocky

    I understand that NSW Education Department is introducing a course of Doublespeak as an introduction to Politics 100. English will be abandoned because it is too difficult for children today to read that Shakespeare bloke with all his weird 17th century language.

    But hang soon, it can’t be all bad because the King James Bible is written in the same idiom and we all know how vital it is for Christian politicians to get their daily fix of Christian principles before they send legal refugees into the hell of Manus or the corrupt pit of Nauru, practice good faming husbandry by polluting the Great Artesian Basin with CSG and maintain family values with some good ole misogyny and sexual abuse of women.

    [That bit about kicking the money-lenders out of the temple is a bit strong, don’t you think? I mean, they had to charge the dead for services because they need the profits to satisfy the lust for money that happy clapper shareholders require to practice their religion of consumerism to the max.]

  6. Kronomex

    Rossleigh, might I suggest a browser (a rather foxy browser) addon called Bypass Paywalls. Only for entertainment purposes mind you.

  7. Sandra Searle

    Just a thought. So this govt. gave those people money to save the reef right, so just why now, when Adani are ramping up their pet project again? Sounds a bit suspicious to me.
    This govt. want the deal to go through, but a good majority of the citizens of our country are against selling coal to anyone because blind Freddy can see that burning coal anywhere on this planet is causing diabolical climate change everywhere.

  8. Ricardo29

    Ah bugger me, it’s depressing. Everywhere you look this stinking government, and now it’s departments, are doing everything they can to stuff the environment while lying outright about the emissions reductions meeting our Paris obligations as Taylor and Morrison have been doing. We can’t be rid of these charlatans too soon.

  9. helvityni

    ” the Minister for Environment or something unimportant…”
    That gave me a good laugh…

    In these grim depressing political times I’m pleased with small mercies, mini laughs, milligrams of joys…

  10. Kronomex

    Looking at that smug righteous pricks face at the top of the article makes you want to take a cricket bat to it for ten minutes.

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