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Tag Archives: International Climate Science Coalition

Malcolm Turnbull And The Ballad Of The Flat Earth Rapper

Ok, B.o.B makes a lot of sense. He’s the rapper insisting that the earth is flat. B.o.B, real name Bobby Ray Simmons, started Tweeting photos which show the horizon, and, he reasons, if the earth were really round like we’ve been told, then we wouldn’t be able to see objects so far into the horizon because the curvature of the earth would make them disappear.

And yesterday I read how a scientist was disputing his idea. Well, I don’t know what the scientist said, but it doesn’t matter. Just the fact that a scientist was disputing him is enough to make me think that his ideas were worth investigating. One should never trust a scientist, as the US Senate proved with their 50-49 vote telling us that climate change isn’t man-made. I mean, these ideas that climate change could be caused by carbon dioxide is ridiculous because carbon dioxide occurs naturally and nothing that occurs naturally could ever be harmful, right? You could never have too much water, right?

Anyway, I decided to do a little research and I discovered plenty of evidence. For a start the Bible talks about the “four corners of the earth” and the last time I checked spheres don’t have corners. Then when Colombus set out to prove that the world was round by circumnavigating it, he bumped into the Americas, which was the only thing that stopped him getting to the edge. And in past few years, Thomas Friedman released a book titled, “The Earth Is Flat”. And if all that isn’t evidence enough, let’s look at the most obvious thing of all:

If the world really was round and spinning, wouldn’t centrifugal force throw us all off?

Convinced, I immediately gathered all the evidence and rang a publisher suggesting that they give me a book deal, but like poor Ian Plimer who had trouble finding a publisher for his anti-global warming book, Heaven And Earth, I was confronted with a conspiracy from the publishers who wanted to know if I had any scientific – or indeed – any qualifications at all. When I suggested that was the trouble with the world, we give far too much weight to people just because they’ve studied the issue in some depth at formal institutions and far too little prominence to the opinions of those who’ve used the Internet to develop their ideas. Besides, I told them, I have a blog and a degree from a university which gives me one up on Andrew Bolt. At this point, they did ask what my degree was for and when I told them Creative Arts, they seemed rather less inclined to pursue the conversation.

A clearer example of pro-science bias would be harder to find. I mean, publishers are there to publish books and if they refuse to publish one it can only be because of some conspiracy – like the ones in our schools where students are told that it’s compulsory to be gay or how they’re expelled if they doubt global warming. (A friend of a friend knows somebody who was told about a child was given a detention because they tried to show their science teacher a graph showing that temperatures hadn’t risen at all, if you took out all the years with above average data. The school apparently argued it was because of the language the boy used when telling the teacher where to stick his climate change ideas, but we all know the real reason.)

Unable to get a publisher, I decided that the ABC was the next best option. Apparently their charter demands balance, so when somebody tells them something that’s true, they’ve obliged to also present the lies of the current Federal Government in the interest of showing all sides.

So I rang the ABC to try and get a spot to put this perfectedly credible theory to their audience, and talk about the conspiracy of book publishers who print far more copies of books suggesting a round earth than the alternative view. Talk about a lack of balance! Well, that’s exactly what they did when I suggested that I’d be taking this up with Malcolm Turnbull. Unfortunately, it was me that they were talking about, suggesting that I was unbalanced just because I started yelling at them that they were all part of some plot started by Galileo to undermine the authority of the church.

Well, I rang Mr Turnbull, but, unfortunately, he couldn’t take my call as he was busy according to the person on the switchboard. Busy doing what? I asked. I mean, it’s not like he’s actually doing anything like pushing for a Republic, trying to fix the Budget emergency or implementing the Gonski reforms. And now that the US Senate has shown us that climate change isn’t man-made, he has no reason to be PM at all, unless he can find something new to do like push for the flat earth theory to be a part of the Australian curriculum.

The person on the switchboard suggested that I email him which I know is just so that they can store my metadata so I’m not going to fall for that one. No, I intend to write him a letter asking why the flat earth theory is being ignored and why members of his party are being censored because we know that surely there must be several who actually believe it and are just too intimidated to speak out.

And I’m going to send a copy to Tony Abbott. He may be able to use this get the leadership back if Malcolm wins the election for him.

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Putting it all together, charity begins at home.

Photo: shutterstock

Photo: shutterstock

So is a good time to start a “charity”?

“The organisations say the cuts clearly break a Coalition promise not to cut their funding when it announced a $4.5bn cut to the aid budget over the next four years two days before the federal election.

At the time of that cut, the then shadow treasurer, Joe Hockey, and shadow finance spokesman, Andrew Robb, said “the Coalition will reprioritise foreign aid allocations towards non-government organisations that deliver on-the-ground support for those most in need”.

“That will also mean putting more money into NGOs who are on the ground and who can deliver aid more efficiently than through AusAID or indeed through some of the multilaterals that we’ve been putting money into in increasing numbers because AusAID cannot handle the increases in the budget,” then foreign affairs spokeswoman Julie Bishop said.

The government said it needed to redirect the $4.5bn towards domestic infrastructure. The cut was from projected expenditure – with the aid budget continuing to grow in line with inflation.”

The Guardian, Jan 18, 2014

And then there’s this:

“Victoria’s most powerful business lobby group wants to be declared a charity in a bid to recoup millions of dollars it has paid in state taxes.

The move would see the ”promotion of commerce” defined as a charitable endeavour, with the group saying charities do not only run soup kitchens.

The Victorian Employers’ Chamber of Commerce and Industry last week petitioned the Supreme Court of Victoria to declare it a charitable and not-for-profit institution for taxation purposes, which would make the group exempt from paying state taxes.”

The Age, Jan 12, 2014

Not to mention this:

“If Tony Abbott is elected prime minister on Saturday he will abolish the watchdog established by Labor to keep an eye on the billions of dollars received and spent by Australian charities each year. Why?

The answer, in part at least, may be the lobbying power of church conservatives, the Catholic Church in particular, and the office of Sydney Cardinal George Pell, more particularly still.

And their focus has not been the Coalition alone. Labor insiders acknowledge the impact of Cardinal Pell’s office as it reduced the scope of its new national regulator, the Australian Charities and Not-for-Profits Commission.

Charity leaders, church heads and political insiders have told The Sunday Age about the lobbying campaign over charities regulation by the Sydney archdiocese, notably Cardinal Pell’s business manager and chief political envoy, Danny Casey.”

Read more:

Sydney Morning Herald, September 1, 2013

Ok, I just hope that the Abbott Government doesn’t consider the Victorian Employers’ Chamber of Commerce and Industry one of those most in need!

Maybe it’s time we just stating asking questions about more than just the obvious.

Still, I seem to remember that the Howard Government had problems with charities “getting involved in politics” and the suggestion being that they should just shut up and help the people that they were meant to help. Can’t help wondering if the Liberals will apply this concept to the Victorian Employers’ Chamber of Commerce and Industry, if it were to gain charity status.

By the way, I hope you’ll all join with me in celebrating the anniversary of that great day in Australia’s history, 26th of January. It’s the sort of thing that we need to remember in these current dark times.

The 26th January is, of course, the anniversary of the Rum Rebellion.

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