In Shock Announcement Morrison Tells Us Craig Is Not A Doctor!

I’m sick of them!! Absolutely sick of these elites who think that they know everything shoving their opinion down everyone’s throat when we all know that Jack’s as good as his master and a furniture salesman has just as much expertise to talk about climate change as one of those university educated know-alls who try to pick my opinion apart by talking about the science and my poor spelling!

And just when I thought that we were getting somewhere what does the Prime Minister do? He tells us that we shouldn’t be getting our information from Facebook and that Craig Kelly is not his doctor! (Some smartarse wrote: “If he’s not giving you a prostate exam, you shouldn’t be allowing him so much latitude when it comes to what he’s doing with his pronouncements!” Geez, another elitist who thinks that they’re clever!)

Whatever happened to freedom of speech? If a government MP can’t promote something in his area of expertise like how good Pete Evans lamp will look with the rest of your furniture without being mocked by his leader, then what’s the world coming to? I mean surely freedom of speech means that anybody can say anything without being put down by people who think that they know better just because they’ve studied the topic at some fancy university or read some fancy academic paper that’s been read by peers. Why should the House of Lords get the final say just because they’re peers?

And then we had the PM telling us that they wouldn’t be asking people to pay back any of the JobKeeper money because he wasn’t into the politics of envy. If mocking Craig Kelly wasn’t an example of the politics of envy, what is? After all, it was clear that our leader is jealous of Kelly’s common touch because you don’t get much more common than Craig. When Scotty uses the word “mate”, it’s his way of trying to show that he’s just one of the boys but you’ll notice that nobody ever calls him “mate” back which just shows that he’s not really part of the gang and not just because he failed to measure the door of the girls’ cubby meaning that they’d never fit inside or because the chook shed fell down before he put any chooks in it!

No, it’s clear Scotty wants people to like him and that he’s only picking on Kelly because Craig has more Facebook friends and that’s why he wants to force Facebook to pay his bestie Rupert for content. Or something like that.

Morrison is about to launch a $24 million ad campaign to encourage us to get an injection but not on Facebook – obviously -because you shouldn’t get your information from there. No we’ll have ads telling us to get the injection as soon as possible when the rollout starts in late February… or early March which is another way of saying “in late February” because isn’t that what March is?

He also told us that like the vaccine rollout, he wants to get to zero emissions “as soon as possible” which is a very definite target because that clearly means if doesn’t happen, it wasn’t possible.

I wonder what a Google search for “Scott Morrison as soon as possible” would throw up…