The AIM Network

Everything Is Political So Even Saying Nothing Is Political If You Think About It!

Image from cbsnews.com (REUTERS / Fayez Nureldine)

Now I promise not to spend too much time on this but I feel the need to point out that the idea that King Chuckles can’t comment on climate change because it’s just a wee bit controversial is one of those things that needs a bit of an examination. I’m just going to do a short examination and then we can go back to discussing politics like we normally do, ok?

Or maybe not, because I’m hoping to one day be voted King and… Oh yeah, that’s right, I’m not eligible owing to the fact that there’s very little in-breeding in my family. Actually, none as far as I know, but I do think that there are several royals who are more than enough evidence that cousins shouldn’t be allowed to breed, even for strategic defence alliances. Surely they can simply marry and go on their merry way having sex with whomsoever they like.

Anyway, the first point I’d like to make is that if the head of state can’t talk about anything that’s defined as political, just what can he or she talk about. Here is my list of things that can’t be discussed or supported by our King or Queen because of their controversial nature.

  1. Charities that help the poor. Ever since Maggie Thatcher declared that there’s no such thing as society, the idea that we should help the poor is a bit political.
  2. Remembrance Day, Ok, it was fine when we all supported war, but some people thought that invading Iraq was a mistake and the whole Weapons of Mass Distraction thing was a beat-up to get at the oil but even if those lefties who pointed out that there was no connection between Bin Laden and Iraq are wrong, it’s still controversial so any support for returning soldiers is a bit political.
  3. The Commonwealth Games. Some countries are leaving the Commonwealth so any attempt to influence them, like travelling to where the games are being held and opening them, could be construed as attempt to influence the domestic politics of that country.
  4. Support for vaccinations. Enough said. Some idiot will surely comment that there have been more vaccinated people die in the past two hundred years than when cavemen roamed their caves. Whatever, it’s political…
  5. Support for the science of climate change. Actually let’s just make that support for any controversial theory. Gravity seems to be accepted, but there is a bit of support out there for the idea that the earth is flat. As for Einstein’s theory of relativity…

I promised I’d be brief. Now I’m just going to forget all about the Royal circus and watch some television because thanks to the death of the Queen, I’ve hardly heard a word about politics.

Mm, my choices seem to be:

“Elizabeth, the Young Queen”; “Queen Elizabeth, The Longest Monarch”: “The Queen’s Horses”: “The Wit Of Elizabeth”; “The Corgis And Their Role In Keeping Britain Together”; “The Royals: A Life Of Servicing In Order To Produce An Heir”; “Monarchists Remember The Time That They Were In Close Proximity To A Royal”; “Why Paul Keating Touching The Queen Was Wrong But Prince Andrew Can Touch Anyone Because He Doesn’t Sweat”; “Remembering Churchill And Queen Elizabeth’s Father”; “Forgetting Koo Stark”; “Why Hating Meghan Markle Isn’t Racist Because She Should Have Known Her Place”; “How Ita Used Her Experience At The Women’s Weekly To Turn The ABC Into Something That Kerry Packer Would Have Enjoyed”; “Prince William Blames Yoko Ono For The Downfall Of The Empire”;  “The Entire ABC Relocate To London To Give Us The Latest News About Any Breaking News”; “Channel Devoted To Following The Queen’s Coffin As It Journeys To Its Final Resting Place”.

Mm, now I know why we need so many days of mourning…

 

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