At a recent low key four flag event, we were treated to a “private conversation” between Peter Dutton, Tony Abbott and Scott Morrison where Dutton said, “Time doesn’t mean anything when you’re about to have water lapping at your door”. We know it’s a private conversation because Peter Dutton himself said so.
Mr Dutton told us, “I had a private conversation with the prime minister. I don’t intend to comment,” before adding, “I don’t have anything to add to it.”
Ok, so now not only doesn’t he comment on operational matters, both “on water” and “in Melbourne”, he also doesn’t comment on private conversations.
Although it does rather strike me that when a conversation has been recorded and broadcast, it’s hard to consider it “private” any more. Just as when I’m waiting in the supermarket queue and I see the headline on one of those magazines which announces: “Kylie’s terrible secret”, I can’t help thinking that it’s no longer a secret if it’s on page eleventeen of a national magazine.
But I shouldn’t let a strict interruption of the facts determine my position. That’s the sort of thing that can get one accused of bias in Abbott’s Australia.
Not that I’m in Abbott’s Australia. I’m excluded because I don’t have the same focus on jobs and growth and security…
Yes, I realise some of you are thinking that it’s a little tedious when I keep making reference to “jobs and growth and security”. and you’re absolutely right. But I’ll stop when he stops! As for Abbott beginning an answer to a question on 7-30 about the economy with, “We’ve stopped the boats…”, when I wrote it in a piece a few months ago, some people laughed. Now we just say, Tony, for heaven’s sake, man, get professional help before it’s too late.
Anyway, one wonders about the subtext of our esteemed Immigration Minister. After being generally regarded as the most incompetent Health Minister since… Now let’s see… Um… Ah… I may have to get back to you on that one. After making a complete botch of Health, Dutton was moved to Immigration where following on the footsteps of Scott Morrison, he merely had to promise to hold a press conference once a week, then say nothing because the government doesn’t comment on operational matters. In fact, he no longer had to hold the press conferences because the media had stopped going because a) Morrison never answered any questions and b) Morrison started announcing that this week’s conference would be held in a remote Queensland town in five minutes time.
So, all Dutton had to do in order to be regarded as performing moderately well, would be to perform his role with the skills that someone in a coma could provide. Just keep your mouth shut, Pete and nobody might notice that you’re not Scott Morrison.
But Dutton seemed to think that his talking is a good thing which is rather strange because I can’t remember any time that he’s opened his mouth and people have said, “Now that’s interesting” or “What a good idea!” Not even the usual cheerleaders of Liberal Policy. When Dutton speaks, his supporters either defend him or change the subject.
So from his little gaffe we’ve learned the following:
- Dutton wasn’t told to treat every microphone as an open mike, or else he didn’t notice that there were a number of such objects within a few feet of his conversation.
- Either Dutton doesn’t believe that sea levels are rising, or he does and just thinks it’s funny that certain people will be displaced.
- Mr Abbott finds it funny too, because he laughed and we’ve been assured that Mr Abbott takes climate change seriously.
- Dutton’s conversational skills are even less impressive than his ministerial skills and he’d make an even less interesting dinner party guest than Bob Menzies. Who admittedly was probably interesting once, but as he passed away last century his discussion skills aren’t what they once were.
But perhaps I’m doing him a disservice. Perhaps, after Abbott’s comments about “Cape York time” and how there was a bit of that up at Port Moresby, Dutton – like Rufus Youngblood – threw himself in the path and took one to protect his leader.
Actually when I think about it, Rufus Youngblood threw his body over Lyndon Johnson because Kennedy had already been shot by then. Mm, he must have decided that Kennedy was too wounded to be worth protecting so he picked the Vice President instead. Interesting… Perhaps a few Liberals should follow Rufus’ lead…
Anyway, perhaps it was just Dutton’s way of making sure that Abbott doesn’t attract any bad press in the week before the Canning by-election – clever how the Liberals have managed to frame it so that a win is a great victory because Labor should win as they only need a mere twelve percent swing. In normal circumstances, Labor may not even field a candidate in a seat like that.
Also interesting that the Liberal candidate, Andrew Hastie doesn’t want to talk about his views on creationism, because that’s not one of the issues in this election. I always like it when politicians do things like that. In the Liberal page telling us about Mr Hastie it informs us: “Andrew and Ruth are active members of their church”, but apparently we can’t ask questions about his beliefs. To me, this is like when politicians parade their families for photo opportunities and interviews and then say, “Leave my family out this” when one of the subjects of the two page spread has managed to wrangle their way out of a punishment, or seemingly gained some advantage from the backer of the party.
It’s like the birthmark on my knee. Now that I’ve brought it up, I can’t claim that you have no right to ask me about the colour and shape. I may choose to say that I’m still keeping it private, but it’s going to be my fault if it somehow becomes an issue!
Of course, Mr Hastie’s views on creationism are really of little interest to me. I’m more interested in his views on science. Does he believe that science is an ongoing quest for knowledge which should be supported in its attempts to improve lives? Or does he hold the same position as Tony Abbott?
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