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An Open Letter to Peta Credlin

Dear Peta Credlin,

First of all let me say that I’m sorry you’re having such a horrible time at work at the moment. Since it’s clear that you work extremely hard and your job is pretty much your life, I’m sorry that your life is fairly horrible at the moment too. I really am. This solidarity I feel with you, by the way, has nothing to do with the feminist code or standing up for the ladies, because quite frankly I don’t think your current predicament has anything to do with your gender and in writing this letter, I want to make the point that I am writing to a person, not a man or a woman. I am writing to a person who holds a great deal of responsibility, and power, and I don’t think you’re getting a fair hearing and clearly no chance to explain what is really going on in your world. So bear with me for a moment while I try to envisage how things have got to this point, and perhaps you are the only person who can confirm or deny if I’m off the mark.

First of all, it’s clear to anyone with any understanding of who and what Tony Abbott is that you’ve got your work cut out for you keeping this moron in check. I know the Australian media did their best to help you out during your time as Chief of Staff to the Leader of the Opposition, in that you didn’t really have to worry about any real scrutiny of your boss, and therefore were able to keep the puppet on-message by sticking to carefully recited three-word-slogans and never answering any questions at press conferences. There weren’t many times when you agreed for Abbott to go on radio or television to be interviewed by anyone who wasn’t already in your corner, fighting the same fight as you, so I guess this made your life a whole lot easier as there was no challenge to the ideas behind the three-word-slogans, or investigation into a pamphlet that you said was a plan but I’m not sure any of the press even read. Most importantly, no one bothered to check if there was any factual or expert analysis contributing to the formation of your slogans; for example, the journalists didn’t worry about the cost and effectiveness of the Direct Action policy because they just loved your idea of taking Abbott banana stacking, truck-stop chatting, butcher visiting and Alan Jones rally attending to fight against a climate change policy that was working to reduce emissions, and generating revenue for renewable technologies just as Labor planned for it to do. The journalists never asked ‘what budget emergency?’ so you could continue to use this lie to justify ideological slash and burn. So this lack of scrutiny generally, for both Abbott’s character, personality, ideas, competence and honesty and for the few policies you told the electorate about before the election, really made your job a whole lot easier.

I’m wondering if perhaps it was too easy. Do you ever wonder if you were lulled into a false sense of security? You knew your boss was incapable of being a leader. You knew that without you by his side at every waking moment, a disaster would happen. That’s why you’ve had to work so hard. That’s why, according to John Lyons, who did me the favour of confirming everything I already knew about Abbott, you’ve had to resort to interrupting Abbott and even placing your hand over his mouth when he’s about to say something stupid. Again. You’re just doing your job! And that’s why I feel sympathy for you. Maybe when he won the election, you got a bit complacent? Or maybe his incompetence is literally impossible to keep secret forever?

Even with the tight controls you have placed on Abbott since becoming Prime Minister, even with you standing close by his side in every interview, in every public appearance, in any scenario where he has to do anything in his job, a job he is being paid very well to do, you can’t stop the occasional glimpse of the real Abbott being flashed to the country. It must give you nightmares! The knowledge that you can stop Abbott leaking himself to the world. No matter what you do, how hard you work, somehow the real Abbott has been revealed. And as you always knew, Australians don’t like this person at all. And as you always knew, there is no way he would be Prime Minister now if it wasn’t for your careful management of his image; and when I say careful management, what I really mean is trying to turn Abbott into someone who doesn’t exist. Because you know as well as I do that he’s just not cut out for his job. He’s not intelligent enough, he’s not articulate enough, he’s not inspirational, funny, kind, quick-witted, compassionate, approachable, organised, fair, strategically minded or, the most importantly, likable. He’s just not likeable and now that Australia has seen the real Abbott, there’s nothing you can do about it now Peta. Your job is finished because you have failed to hide Abbott. You’re going down with the sinking ship.

Before I sign off, I want you to know that I might respect you, but I certainly don’t like you. I don’t like the job you are doing, but I respect that you’re working hard. I just wish you were working hard for the good of Australia, rather than for the good of rich mates and donors to the Liberal Party, and to bring about the IPA’s vision of Australia, which is quite frankly terrifying. But you’re clearly determined, organised, and capable, and the reason you’re still sitting next to the Prime Minister of Australia, feeding policy ideas into cabinet, pushing your version of the world onto the country’s agenda, and making life very difficult for anyone who falls outside of your privileged bubble is because he needs you. He can’t get rid of you because you’re the only thing between him and humiliating annihilation in his career. So you’ll keep your job, but it’s not going to be easy. Now that the scrutiny has finally, belatedly, arrived, it’s like a tap that has been turned on and is now spewing water like a fire hydrant. You can’t turn this tap off now Peta. Abbott’s own colleagues are leaking to your old media friends, so this is way out of your control now. Abbott is now a known liar, so when he denies the content of the leaks, no one believes him. Does Abbott even have any friends except you anymore? We can all see that your boss, the emperor is not wearing any clothes and no matter how many blue ties you try to cover him up with, we can see his rude bits and quite frankly, the country is disgusted by the sight of him.

Yours sincerely
Victoria Rollison

44 comments

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  1. CMMC

    Hear, hear!

    Peta obviously follows the corporate doctrine of Kruger Industrial Smoothing;

    ‘We don’t care, …..and it shows!’

  2. catsman

    That was a sincere bucketing. Kudos.

  3. thevenerable1

    Bummer. I’ve already done my referring-on-to-another-blog for today, but now here’s this one.
    Sighh … Poor the rest of ’em: they’ll just have to put up with another referral.
    Too good, Victoria ! But btw, you’ve done a Me: you’ve written one ‘can’ when you mean ‘can’t’:
    http://snag.gy/kfPME.jpg
    bottom line …

  4. Ray Borradale

    I would have liked to have considered the influence on Credlin and therefor Abbott by Credlin’s husband, Brian Loughnane, federal director of the Liberal Party.

  5. bearbrooke

    Rather snide.

  6. Blanik

    Is there any wonder the poor women drinks?

  7. DanDark

    Excellent Victoria, where is Tones Simkin when he needs him, wasn’t Simkin hand picked/poached to help with media strategy etc to polish the turd more, that has been another failure For the Tones, and his tarnished and battered image have just got worse in the last week, the libs are flying blind have been for 18 months and the result is the demise of not only Tones and Peta but the whole liberal party, the brand is so damaged now it will be impossible for them to recover to their former glory for many years to come….

  8. diannaart

    No sympathy for Credlin’s Smithers to Abbott’s Mr Burns. As a feminist myself, the only thing Credlin has done regarding women is further entrench the image of the behind-the-scenes female manipulator.

  9. aravis1

    O well played, Victoria! I hope you sent this to Peta?

  10. bkpyett

    Enjoyed this letter, well done Victoria!

  11. stephentardrew

    Blind injustice covered with a thick veneer of ingenuousness.

  12. Florence nee Fedup

    Some times I wonder if even Tony sees himself as PM. Makes comments more like a onlooker, bystander, one of the mob. Not what one would expect from a competent PM.

    When he keep telling us, he is a good PM, good government, who is he trying to convince, us, his government or himself.

  13. Geraldine Reid

    Congrats on this letter Victoria….well said…

  14. roaminruin

    I admire the way you can be scathing yet remain polite, vitriolic yet measured. Love ya work!

  15. Florence nee Fedup

    I wonder if Peta regrets giving up her last chance of having a child for this?

  16. Adnil

    I love it….well done Victoria.

  17. braindrainers

    Hey there, Peta Credlin
    Time to stop your goddam meddlin’
    Lose the lies that Winky’s peddlin’
    Cut your losses while there’s time.

    Spare a thought for hubby Brian
    Remember him and all his lyin’?
    ‘Bout the cash for which he’s tryin’
    To say not I, deny, deny?

    Your slaggy Golem’s gone and done it
    Stuffed Australia, tried to con it
    Took its soul and shat upon it
    Thinks his water tastes like wine.

    And now, what have we here to view
    A phony statesman through and through
    A strutter poncing from his cage
    Derisive fool on larger stage

    Embarrassment at every turn
    When will the burghers ever learn
    Conservatives are here to spurn
    Not ever left to govern.

  18. Sir ScotchMistery

    Seriously, within the Independent Media Network, we have a wealth of skills, a capacity to turn any effort hurled against us, back to the hurler.

    We are almost to the point where LNP sock puppets read what we do, and don’t comment any more because of the ire that rains down when they do.

    I have to believe that Credlin et al, do read this, and I wonder how they feel about themselves at the end of each day after having been touched up by Abort in the way only a lizard can touch a person and leave them feeling filthy about themselves, go home to their wives/husbands/boyfriends in some cases (evening Kwithtoffer), and try and get back to the point in their lives where they still owned some elements of their humanity.

    Victoria as usual has hit a nerve, so I am going to go and hunt down a course in creative writing, because to be able to turn out such as this, is a skill to be marveled at, and a capacity to be found and nurtured, in oneself.

    Well done all of us, and today, well done Victoria. Made my Sunday more than Macca did.

  19. Sir ScotchMistery

    In fact well done everyone for maintaining the rage.

  20. paul walter

    Yes, he has been a naughty boy..new mothers and more highly strung nannies often are put about by the antics of the Little Lord Fauntleroy, I must suggest going to to the hirthoe unthought of next step, a hard slap on the backside and sent to his room without his dinner, no teev, no Marvel Superhero comics.

    It does, really, raise the issue of the peculiar relationship between little Tony and “Mummy”.

  21. diannaart

    Paul

    What fascinates me about the Credlin/Abbott dichotomy is that Abbott really does not ‘get’ women – even more so than your average male LOL – I don’t ‘get’ this relationship.

    However, Credlin is physically intimidating and maybe Abbott’s issue with women is that deep down he is scared of us and Credlin uses this fear.

  22. bensab3

    Yes and thanks from me too. I think that you have said everything that has frustrated, no angered me about this whole period of government. It has begun to unravel I think, reading the tweets lately which direct me to that newspaper that I wouldn’t be seen dead buying. Seems to be a slightly shifting viewpoint right now. Perhaps IPA and Murdoch can see the writing on the wall for Abbott, so they will try to resurrect the LNP with someone else. Won’t be much better whoever they choose. This shift to Libertarian-style government has been accepted by the Front Bench therefore they are just as tainted.

    I too ask, did you send this to Peta?

  23. donwreford

    With regard to the so called terrorist Man Haron Monis, in the Lindt Cafe, Martin Place, the British police, MI5/6 having instigated and encouraged terrorism, their are several reasons for this, one is the police need a job, if they cleaned up crime they will eventually lose their job, in the main most police will not have a badge of power and most police have a love of authority as a result of them being in the main emotional cripples, or lacking in self esteem, and have a problem to get a job other than say security guard work, two, the politicians need the illusion of safety that they are looking after the welfare of the public, as the general public having no real bond with each other but having become isolated individuals that no individual has trust with each other, have to have a bond of unification, that is those who are the nasty people and us being the nice guys.
    The London police more or less sold the idea over to all police, such as ASIO, CIA, Mossad, and so on, the motivation of police who have been given directives of protecting the 1% rich, and to be paid by the masses in taxation.
    As you will note the police could have shot Haron, as their was plenty of opportunities to do so by a marksman, this would have avoided the two people killed by police in the shoot out, why was their a shoot out? the police needed glory, to have a shoot out would be exciting and look good for the Australian public, here we must say the Australian public are pretty gullible in so far as being manipulated by propaganda.
    We note Haron was not even on the top list of 400 police suspects, the reason being is they need to show a relaxed attitude to terrorists to encourage them to violate the laws of Australia, supporting increasing repressive laws as a excuse to enact law that would create a backlash of public opinion.

  24. Sir ScotchMistery

    @Donwreford-

    Are you sure that was meant for this particular thread?

    FTLOM I can’t see any reference to Monis in the article.

  25. Paolo Soprani

    Brilliant! So well written. If only comment such as this appeared in The Sydney Morning Herald or The Age. I would no longer feel as if I live in a country that has been ‘invaded and overrun by barbarians’!

  26. paul walter

    Sir Scotch, allow some lattitude, It is loosely relevant because it shows how out of control things are since Abbott’s minders lost their grip on him ..mistake of amateurs.

    Flailing arounf like a mad thing he is,
    Peta lost control.

  27. bobrafto

    Way to go Vicki, I just love those sharp claws.
    Tearing off strips with impeccable incision!

  28. John Lord

    As only you can Victoria.

  29. Bilal

    She has not fully succeeded in preventing him going feral, hence the insult to Indonesia, the insult to Gillian Triggs, the Long Knife on Ruddock and the verbal assault on the Muslim Mufti. Hope he stays as PM until the election.
    Notice how Camps Commandant Morrison is now reading to little kiddies? Positioning himself for PM of the Tea Party?

  30. paul walter

    Murdoch wanted her sacrificed, but in the end it is for the Monk to gain some control over himself.

  31. DanDark

    Bilal said “Notice how Camps Commandant Morrison is now reading to little kiddies? Positioning himself for PM of the Tea Party?”

    Its called a makeover, they are putting red lipstick on the pig, but a pig is a pig and no amount of lipstick will help them now. if it looks and sounds like a duck its a duck, and Morrison does a lot of quacking.
    Morriscum is the face of cruelty and trying to rejig his image will be another Lib strategists failure 🙂

  32. Rosemary (@RosemaryJ36)

    An absolutey brilliant piece, Victoria.
    As an aside, if Abbott were to be revealed as being ineligible to even nominate for the House of Representatives, and if his colleagues were complicit in this, would they not need to resign en masse and call a fresh election?

  33. paul walter

    Rosemary, you mean if they discovered he was a Pom?

  34. Florence nee Fedup

    Ray Hadley and Lines are after Abbott along with Peta. More stories coming tomorrow., If this true, this week should be interesting.

    http://www.2gb.com/audioplayer/91326

    Human Rights commissioner, Gillian Triggs, appearing fore Senate hearings Tuesday I think. Expect a blood bath for her.

  35. gracelee11Lee Patrick

    Victoria, I think there is very little else to be added. You have clearly shown the difference between the marketed object and the actual object.

    It happens at every level of government, I know because there was a time when I created those sickening profiles for local Members. I remember marketing a local council as a ‘green and sustainable community environmentally’ , at the same time as they were bulldozing the last remnant of the Swan Coastal Plain in their area. Then ‘sustainability’ was the new buzz word now it’s just another jargon sell.

    Australians still have this naivety that there is honour among our potential leaders. Hopefully this abysmal embarrassment of a Reprentative of our country, will finally open the eyes of the voting public, that ‘it’s only cleverly used words – it simply is not true’.

    Ps …My God woman you can write.

  36. WeNeedToWakeUp (@Alohaviola1)

    Credlin has dug a very big hole for herself and Abbott. A hole like they used to build for latrines. Can she be building her own escape tunnel out of the shithole? I’ve tweeted several times over the past week, enquiring about her whereabouts since the Friday before the spill. No-one can even give me a sighting. If she’s done a runner, Victoria you may get your missive stamped return to sender person unknown.

  37. Annie B

    @WeNeedToWakeUp ……..

    I have wondered the same thing myself, and have made that same query, elsewhere on one of the AIM articles. … She is currently conspicuous by her absence. … Maybe Julie B. threatened her with something or other ????? 😉

    ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

    Peta Credlin is in one of two states of mind …. she’s either THE most powerful bod in Federal politics – EVER, and is revelling in the power.

    OR ~~~

    She is being played for one of the biggest fools ever – to work for, or anywhere near an alleged leader. She has been conned. She is being blatently used.

    A third option ? …… She sticks with it ( behind the scenes as she is not presently visible ) to get the $$$$ that she is paid to do whatever the hell it is she does.

    …………

    @ Victoria …….. a seriously superbly written ‘letter’ / article. Fantastic.

  38. gangey1959

    Now THAT is Sarcasm.
    I was hoping to find ‘BITCH’ at the end, but no matter.
    What a letter.
    TOP marks Victoria. A Gold Star for you.

  39. Bob

    Ok great article and very enjoyable. I tend to think that you flattered the punch drunk moron in the PM’s lodge though.

  40. AndrewL

    Firstly, nice job, Victoria.
    Credlin is going to be needed when Tony’s gone and dusted to groom and protect the next mentally unstable customer, Scott “hide the boats and the kids” Morrison. He has so many skeletons in the immigration closet now, he is going to need all the protection and sloganeering the party can muster.

  41. khtagh

    You never fail Victoria, never. So well written, so accurate too.

  42. Jock Rayner

    Victoria u really are a bitter one aren’t u

  43. Sir ScotchMistery

    Ahh Jock, another fooking scotchman.

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