By James Moylan
The Politically Correct Peoples Association has had a terrific twelve months. I write to thank our all of our thoroughly indoctrinated members for their efforts and also to remind you that we are once again entering the secular holiday season. So it is time to redouble our efforts. Yes we are on the verge of victory; but we are still yet to win in our war against ‘Christmas’. However the fight is ongoing.
First of all I would like to point out that it is obvious that our enemies are on-the-ropes. By any objective measurement it is apparent that we are winning in our battle against the ‘red menace’ (colloquially called ‘Santa’). All you need to do is to walk down the main shopping street in any town across our country to see that nobody dares play ‘Christmas’ propaganda tunes in public anymore. Also most shopkeepers have simply given up trying to promote this insidious ‘festival’ at all. There is barely a piece of tinsel or sprig of holly to be seen!
But nonetheless we must all remain on guard. If we lift our feet from the necks of these ‘Christians’ then they will soon creep back into positions of power and influence. We will once again see members of this cult openly attesting to their beliefs in our parliaments and on our media outlets. We will once again see citizens bandying about gross insults like ‘Ha%$# Chr#$&@^$’ and feeling content to rip our arboreal friends from the sanctity of their quiet forest glades to be stuck into pots and tortured by hanging heavy objects from their quivering limbs. Thank secularism that nobody wastes their time with office parties anymore. At least our commercial sector seems to have totally abandoned the practice of celebrating these sick bronze-age mythologies.
However despite our overwhelming success in suppressing any mention of ‘Christmas’ in our media or in our shops; there are still actions that you can still take on a daily basis to ensure that our society does not slip backwards. Remember that you must be quick to suppress any mention of this evil cultish celebration wherever and whenever it is encountered. If we are not vigilant then these ‘Christians’ will once again feel free to gather together in their temples and worship their sky-fairy whenever they want. We will once again see millions of garish cult symbols festooning all of our houses and city streets. Our Godless Marxist inspired battle must continue or we will soon be knee-deep in wrapping paper and glazed-eyed children. Unscrupulous traders will be selling truckloads of cheap trinkets designed to spontaneously fall apart after three minutes of handling. Again we will be subject to endless reams of commercial propaganda featuring animated animals shopping at large department stores.
However it is obvious that our final victory is only a few oppressive, intolerant, fanatical, steps away! All due to your hard work. So I would like to thank all of the members of our vast and powerful multinational socialist conspiracy for helping us bring these cultish propagandists to their knees and for helping to banish these magical superstitions and practices from our society. Our success to date is apparent. Our ultimate victory is assured.
So have a happy summer break everyone. I wish you all a quiet and uneventful series of entirely secular public holidays. And also a happy progression into the new calendar year.
Your fanatical Marxist overlord,