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Tony Abbott Addresses The G20 But Forgets To Put Stamp On Envelope And So It Comes Back To Him!

Today Mr Abbott had the opportunity to talk to the World’s Leaders. As he noted, some of the most powerful and influential people in the world were in the room, and if Rupert and the IPA had been there it would have been a really important occasion.

“Nowhere on earth will there be a more influential gathering than this,” he said, before adding that, normally, due to the red tape of the local council, they’d have had a lot more trouble getting a park. Mr Abbott went on to explain some of the extremely important issues that faced the municipality where the G20 was being held, in the hope that some of the hysterical calls for discussions on climate change could be seen in perspective.

“This room symbolises the limitations on our power!” Mr Abbott went on, “Thanks to the Liberal Government blocking all the traffic, you people have been able to drive on whatever side of the road you chose to, and that’s our plan for all of Australia. Anyone with a chauffeur can do whatever the hell they want to.”

Mr Abbott then suggested that they speak from their hearts rather than the parts of the body that politics often called for. “Personally, I’ve been forced to say things I don’t mean for years now, and I’d just like to have the opportunity to allow you people to tell me in private how much you respect me for being able to get myself elected with so little to offer.”

He suggested that people address each other by their first names, no matter how difficult they were to pronounce, and for any knights or dames to be simply addressed as “sir” to avoid gender confusion.

Mr Abbott added that there were constraints facing us all. Australia, for example, had a big deficit problem, and that some people weren’t happy with the brave decisions his government was trying to make, while not annoying people with a double dissolution.

“It doesn’t matter what spending program you look at, it doesn’t matter how wasteful that spending program might appear, there are always some people in the community who vote who love that program very much.

Mr Abbott went on to cite an example of an extremely wasteful community program.

“For a long time most Australians who went to see a doctor have been seen at no charge and we would like to see a $7 co-payment for people who are going to see the doctor.

“In most countries this is not unusual … but it is proving to be massively difficult to get this particular reform through the Parliament.

“So getting the budget under control has proven very difficult.”

 

Mr Abbott added that he was sure that all of the world leaders would like to set the example by paying a $7 payment every time they spoke at the G20, because as they all knew, nothing was free, not even speech.

“It’s just a way of helping cover the enormous costs of an event like this. After all, thanks to the Labor Party, Australia had the GFC which left the country with enormous debt and, unlike most of you, who were unaffected by Labor’s mismanagement, we need every cent we can get to the Budget back into surplus.”

Mr Abbott closed his remarks by demonstrating that even while he was drinking a glass of water, he could still make statements on behalf of the IPA.

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  1. little devil

    “For a long time most Australians who went to see a doctor have been seen at no charge

    Doesn’t anyone pay the medicare levy now

  2. John Kelly

    For the sake of the mental state of 23 million Australians, will someone in the Liberal party pleeeeeeeeaase tap this idiot on the shoulder and take him out to Happy Acres for a nice long rest.

  3. David

    I presume Rossleigh the purpose of your latest is to show what an absolute ignorant fool this physco, who calls himself a leader was shown to be today at the G20 in front of the worlds leaders and media.
    I am totally embarrassed and disgusted with the actions of a sick in the head man.

  4. JohnB

    Is anybody willing to admit writing this embarrassing internationally irrelevant guff for Abbott?
    Perhaps his regular writers and advisers have given up feeding him speeches to mangle.
    It would explain a lot if it was indeed all his own work.

  5. Florence nee Fedup

    I bet there is not a leader in that room, that wished they did not have Australia’s financial balance sheet. Would love the debt, employment and growth figures we have had since 2008. Must be wondering what Abbott is raving on about.

    By the way, most pay gap payments when visiting GP and specialists. Many pay private medical insurance as well.

  6. Annie Byam

    Rossleigh …… um – ah – a good piece of wordage ? or circumlocution …… or something. …. I hope I enjoyed it.

    Too close to the bone for my comfort, albeit sarcasm at it’s best . !!

    ______________

    WHAT ……….. THE …………… HELL, was … THAT ? ( Abbott’s ACTUAL address to the world’s nations leaders which I watched and wish I hadn’t ) …. is THAT what it was ? An address to the world at the G20 ?

    Ye Gods.

    I am so deeply embarrassed at this moment, having heard this ‘ … leader … ‘ ( of what ? ) speak to the world’s leaders in front of him, and introduce his own agendas, his own difficulties, his own domestic issues, …….. his own, his own, his own – – -ad infinitum..

    I damn near choked and had to rewind a bit – when he used the word ‘circumscribed’ ….. I had hoped he hadn’t said ‘circumcised’…..

    Anything – but anything, was possible.

    Such a suppository of wisdom is he.

    Excuse me …. I can write no longer – I suddenly feel very very ill. !!

    ——

  7. Rob031

    1) Yesterday Obama and the Chinese leader affirmed the problem of Climate change and made some commitments to help.
    2) Today Abbott crowed about getting rid of the so-called ‘carbon tax’ and whined about his problems in other areas.
    3) And later today Moon and Obama reiterated how CC is to be taken seriously seriously.

    How does (2) work? Have Abbott and his crew slipped their moorings? What is going on in the Liberal ‘Think-Tank’ at the moment? Will Abbott get a timely tap on the shoulder?

  8. keerti

    I’m glad I’m a New Zealander…… I don’t have to hide my face!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. stephentardrew

    Abbott has gone beyond a joke he is making the whole country look like a bunch of appalling simpletons. Whining about Domestic issues at an international forum is poison. There is no way back for the ethically challenged infantile schoolboy bully narcissist. He has destroyed any hope of a reasonable diplomatic resolution with Russia and is hauling the rest of the world along with his madness. Diplomacy means diplomacy idiot. You know give and take to come out with the best solution. Another cold war is the worst possible solution. Is it no enough to remind us of the hundreds of thousands killed in Iraq on a lie while the doyens of war still think it was OK. The hypocrisy of the coalition of the willing is unbelievable. Obama sweet talks the masses while being complicit in the Wall Street rorting of the wold. It’s not left or right that is insane it is the neo-conservative, economic rationalist version of capitalism that is the driving force behind this madness. Don’t even talk to me of Global Warming.

    Sometimes I just want to kick nearly every politician in the arse and tell them to grow up, go back to school, and learn a little logic. No wonder citizens are so poorly informed and biased.

    We truly are ruled by fools internationally.

    The US wants complete military and economic hegemony at any price and don’t the BRIC’s know it.

    We are, so to speak, in serious shit.

  10. Annie Byam

    stephen ……

    If ANY of the other world leaders at this farce called G20 ( made a farce by the Abbott ) ….. takes the SLIGHTEST bit of notice of him, then they are as mad as he is.

    I doubt very much there would be a cold war, brought about by a person who very obviously ( after his utterly infantile whiny speech ) has not got all the bolts and screws attached ( that is, other than Andrew Bolt !! ) …..

    The lights are on – but nobody’s home.

    I would think these other world leaders might go away peeved at worst, that they travelled all the way here to be confronted by a …. a….. I have no further words that I would be permitted to use here, to describe him.

    Not sure that we ( as Australian people ) are in serious shit ……… but ABBOTT certainly is…… As individual Australians we are still respected, and probably now almost pitied – for what we have to deal with. ….. Several of my overseas friends are absolutely appalled at what is going on here. ….. and I am only one person. How many more here, have friends elsewhere who still know who we are, and what we stand for, and know what is going on.

    NOBODY in their right mind could equate the Abbott with anything truly Australian.

    I would think the BRIC lot would be well appraised of America ( and us !! ) …..

    And what the U.S. might be doing now, they have been doing for decades. …. Nothing is new there. …. They appointed themselves the ‘police’ of the world years ago. And there are monetary organisations, and secretive groups ( Bilderberg – alleges it is ‘open’ – but isn’t ) …. wheels within wheels, monumental cartels with purely monetary concerns. ……. the list is long.

    We WILL get through and past this.

  11. Florence nee Fedup

    Can I suggest that every time we pay a gap payment or payment for medical procedures that are not covered by Medicare we email Dutton’s office with the information, Also when one pays Private Insurance. Include extra’s in any private hospital visit.

    I have no idea what Australia that Abbott and his ilk live. it is definitely not mine.

    Time to tear down the straw-men that Abbott built to justify his actions when it comes to budgeting and the economy.

  12. Möbius Ecko

    And then we have the MSM on some of the news bulletins yesterday saying Abbott is doing a good job at the G20. As far as I could ascertain they base this purely on the fact Abbott is meeting people, shaking their hands in that awkward and negative way he does and none of them openly complain.

    Mark O’Reilly on 7 News for instance mentioned Abbott talking local politics to the world leaders but immediately afterwards went on to say that Abbott is dong a good job.

  13. Florence nee Fedup

    It is what Abbott has been saying for years. Seems public go along with his tripe. They voted him in.

  14. Lee

    “Doesn’t anyone pay the medicare levy now”

    Yes, and a $25 gap.

  15. Kaye Lee

    Let’s not forget their generous offer to let us buy Medibank Private….ignoring the fact that we already own it.

  16. CMMC

    ‘Why is this grotty halfwit wasting our time?’ they are obviously thinking.

  17. donwreford

    Is it not a most peculiar and idiosyncratic utterance for Abbott to say ” he has for years had to say what he says by force what he does not want to say” the article goes on to say, you, meaning the statesmen, can come to see me in private, and congratulate me on having so little to say myself, have I got the gist of this commentary wrong? if it is right, or the gist right? who is Abbott?

  18. mars08

    JohnB:

    Is anybody willing to admit writing this embarrassing internationally irrelevant guff for Abbott?
    Perhaps his regular writers and advisers have given up feeding him speeches to mangle…

    Indeed. That’s what I was wondering. Who let the halfwit loose with that speech? Why didn’t his minders to see it for the steaming pile of shit it was???

  19. lefturnahead

    I started watching Abbotts speech yesterday, [ something i would not normally do ] and with each sentence i started to cringe,and cringe some more,then some more,and in the end i was at least 2 metres shorter than i normally am so i had to stop in order to preserve what was left of my sanity. I could almost see the thought bubbles above the leaders heads as the village was waffling on and on and on about his personal domestic agendas and bla bla bla boring boring. As Keating once said,” Is this it?is that all their is? is this all we get for our money? If anybody was in any doubt that we are the laughing stock of the world well yesterday would have put any doubt to bed once and for all. Please””’ to that village out there”’please come back and reclaim your idiot.” Please””””’

  20. rossleighbrisbane

    Actually, there are times when I think that Abbott’s speechwriters are recycling some of my previous blogs.
    Whatever, I tend to think that there’ll be various non-English speaking world leaders suggesting that their translators English skills are not up to scratch; the English-speaking ones, however, will wonder why they weren’t provided with a translator…

  21. mars08

    @rossleighbrisbane

    You’re probably right!!! Some of those attending the G20 might be expecting Abbott’s speech of make sense. Maybe their envoys and foreign affairs boffins should have mentioned it in their background briefings.

    BTW… I just checked Babelfish. Sadly, it doesn’t support “moron to English” translation….

  22. rossleighbrisbane

    @mars08
    Perhaps you should have checked Fox News. They certainly have an English to Moron translation, but it has a few bugs when you try to translate it back.

  23. Kaye Lee

    I sometimes wonder about Mark Kenny….

    “That said, there is still something impressive about a prime minister who despite his time constraints and legions of staff, insists on crafting most of his own speeches. This is Abbott the writer and thinker.”

    Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/comment/the-lighter-side-of-tony-abbott-revealed-20140911-10fdiu.html#ixzz3JBM2RcXs

    Janet Albrechtsen confirms that Abbott writes his own stuff….

    “In Abbott’s office, a team of speechwriters co-ordinated by Paul Ritchie helps the Prime Minister with his speeches. Using the input as a guide, not a script, the PM prefers to write his own speeches, especially the more important ones.”

    http://www.theaustralian.com.au/opinion/columnists/the-real-tony-abbott-struggles-to-come-across/story-e6frg7bo-1226937773056

  24. John Fraser

    <

    At least Abbotts office got the "seating" right this time.

    They sent Margie of to a dustbowl in 40 degree heat.

  25. stephentardrew

    Annie we still have a formidable problem.

    If in our wildest dream if we think that this alliance of Canada, the US, Britain, Germany and others, combined with the World Bank and IMF (Legarde telling us to increase the GST), are not a bunch of greed infested oligarchic elites then we are fools. The promoters of austerity will only pull back when wages and conditions, for many in the first world, are dramatically reduced. Point is Abbot, for all his incompetence, is one of them, he is their fool so don’t expect any serious blow back. The greatest nation on earth has more people imprisoned than any other country. They have greed as their mantra and victim blame as their justification for cruelty to their own citizens.

    We are going to hell in a hand basket with this mob and, as has been demonstrated by other bloggers, the media is, in general, complicit and compliant. The lies are not recent lies they go back for decades to Thatcher and Regan and we have not yet effectively challenged them. This farce of the G20 is a slap in the face to nations and their citizens as global corptocracy rolls on in its accumulation of wealth and belittling of working class people. Obama rattles on about the middle class but the real force of any society is the working class who, without them, the wealthy have no willing slaves for generating their fortunes. Marx’s critique writ large.

    Obama peddles his class dogma as if many of the working class will ever have a chance to enter the so called “middle class”. The whole paradigm is classist, elitist while the greatest con is neo-conservative trickle down economics when they have not just turned the tap off but reversed the trickle.

    Yes for those who suffer unfairly it is that serious. And this country left and right are central players in the travesty.

  26. Florence nee Fedup

    Maybe removing that rebate for private insurance would return money to Medicare bottom line.

  27. Florence nee Fedup

    Wives not getting much of look in, at this G20.. Howard’s wife would have never allowed such shocking omission.

    Definitely only or the blokes. . No wonder the German leader took herself off to the pub.

  28. Lee

    “Maybe removing that rebate for private insurance would return money to Medicare bottom line.”

    A lot of people would simply abandon private health insurance, resulting in more claims from Medicare and longer waiting lists in public hospitals.

  29. Florence nee Fedup

    No evidence to support that supposition. if they had any brains, they would.

  30. lawrencewinder

    Lordy… if it was a horse you’d have to put it down…. but at least he came close to admitting the “free-market” agenda they never want to discuss…The “The Ugly American,” Murdoch and his minions at the IPA must be apoplectic at his incompetence in “selling” their message instead of exposing it for the selfish anti-social medievalism it is.

  31. guest

    It is quite clear that Abbott thinks the G20 is all about him. What he says is so often wrong, inappropriate or just a fantasy. “You bet you are!

    That he should complain about a debt and deficit which is amongst the smallest in the world, or claims that his Direct Action plan will show emission reductions immediately and is equal to any plan in the world, or complains about domestic problems as if they are caused by anyone but himself are clear pointers of big problems in the Coalition camp. If he is writing and delivering this nonsense in such a forum, then Abbott is clearly out of control.

    And who supports him? Surely the Murdoch press and the IPA and various other “think tanks” in Oz must be cringing with embarrassment. While their dismay might not be yet apparent, they must be wondering how long thy should allow this lunacy to continue. And when they do face the truth, the end for Abbott will b swift and clinical.

  32. Gregory T

    I thought that Abbott was doing a one man roast of himself.

  33. Faye

    What part of “embarrassment” does our Prime Minister not understand ?
    He advertises, daily what a total incompetent he is and STILL the Press make allowances

  34. mars08

    Faye… I’m sure he doesn’t understand the meaning of “shame” either…

  35. Billy muddle maudlin

    Loved your comment on debt, Flo! Shame, Gillard last year and little billy now haven’t your understanding of economics.
    As for the rabbott’s $7 whinge, the westpak boss on the same scale would be paying about $5000. I wonder if she paid the Medicare levy? Apparently the rich, using the rabbott approved minimisation schemes, pay no tax and no levy.
    The upshot of his speech is the re confirming of his qualification for the local council’s best in the street award.

  36. Kerri

    You gotta wonder about a “world leader” whose wife won’t even meep his company?

  37. Frosty

    That’s a very old photo – no comb over and no blue tie.

  38. Win jeavons

    I had to learn logic and clear thinking when at school. Shame this was dropped in the 70’s so no politician under the age of 60 can think much at all, never mind logically .

  39. Angie

    how about something on Abbott not renouncing his British citizenship prior to entering Australian politics under our Constitution? imagine if he had to repay every cent he earned in salary, perks etc. not to mention anything he’s ever signed as a member of Parliament which will now mean zilch! any laws passed will become invalid…IMAGINE THE MESS?

    WHAT DATE MR ABBOTT DID YOU SUPPOSEDLY RENOUNCE YOUR BRITISH CITIZENSHIP? SHOW US EVIDENCE WITH THE DATE PLEASE!

    Funny how nobody can find anything….

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