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The Easter Bunny is No Fool – The GFEB is onto Covid Vaccination Rollout

Tens of thousands Easter bunnies,

  tens of thousands Easter eggs,

tens of thousands, secret promise

  lots of chocolate froggy legs.

(The Liberal Easter Promise, AB) 

Tens of thousands fully vaccinated in NSW, new daily data reveals‘ – Sydney Morning Herald, 2 April 2021.

The Sydney Morning Herald and NSW Health should have announced and published this yesterday on 1 April instead of leaving it up to the Good Friday Easter Bunny, or as Roald Dahl might say, ‘the GFEB’.

Is this a cause for celebration? Is it even true? Headline – ‘tens of thousands fully vaccinated in NSW’ says the GFEB!

Let’s do the maths and logistics after 6 weeks rollout of phase 1a, noting Morrison boasted he’d have 4 million done nationwide, 15% of the Australian population by end of March, now gone. God the man’s mouth just swims in chocolate!

Population of NSW – 8.164 million

People fully vaccinated in NSW by Good Friday – Almost 30,000 <0.4%

People half vaccinated in NSW by Good Friday – 94,500 <1.2%

Doesn’t include Commonwealth vaccinations of aged care in nursing homes or GP clinics and we know that is speculatively pitifully low and to date unreported.

Not that sweet! What exaggeration! What kind of public health journalism is this?

What proportion of phase 1a had or has been even now completed before phase 1b, estimated 6 million nationwide was announced and commenced by Greg Hunt more than two weeks ago – Anyone know?

Ahhh! The eagle landed and now we have the Easter rush.

What do we know so far about Australia’s COVID-19 vaccine rollout?‘ – Sydney Morning Herald, 17 March 2021.

“The first inoculation… on February 21, started Phase 1a of the rollout. This phase was made up of people either at a higher risk of contracting COVID-19 or at a higher risk of becoming very sick if they do: so, quarantine and border workers, frontline healthcare workers, and staff and residents at aged care and disability facilities…

There are about 678,000 people in Phase 1a across Australia. By March 14 the Sydney Morning Herald reported there had been 164,437 vaccinations given nationwide.”

Group 1a (national) half vaccinated <25% for this relatively small top priority emergency group after three weeks rollout; that was nearly three weeks ago incomplete and short supply and we are melting a pot of 6 million already in phase 1b.

There’s a sugar-coated jousting match right now between States and Federal governments, Liberals vs Liberals in the State of NSW as Public Health is knocked off its public horse in the interests of politics, ego and the rush to fill our baskets with lots of chocolate Easter eggs.

Morrison and Berejiklian are you proud now you are fully and half vaccinated? Were either of you in phase 1a anyway?

GPs everywhere are saying the rollout is fanciful and farcical, riddled with incompetence, idiocy and uncertainty. GP clinics just can’t get hold of the vaccine and everyone is standing in the queue at their door.

‘They could have stocked up on tens of thousands of little chocolate Easter eggs’ claims the GFEB.

So how we doing so far? Something close to piss in a plant pot and entirely predictable for both of our two bleeding heart Liberal-National coalition governments, neither of which are or were fit to govern and administer.

Australia is ‘not behind’ in its COVID-19 vaccine rollout, Department of Health says‘ ABC, 2 April 2021.

“Australia’s Department of Heath insists the country ‘is not behind in its vaccine rollout’, despite handing out just 670,000 doses – 3.3 million fewer than where the Prime Minister expected the country would be by now.” (ABC Health & Wellbeing, 1 April 2021).

Is anyone here missing the blinding obvious!

Meanwhile more than half the population in the UK have received their first vaccination (2.6 times the population of Australia) – of course we understand the far greater urgency in the UK, but at least when they say they have started it is not just happening, it’s an impressive achievement – NHS, you can’t underestimate a good public health system.

And have you noticed what private medicine and health care is contributing to COVID-19 or the vaccination rollout in this country?

‘Not a single private egg in public sight, but who knows…’ he whispers in sweet soliloquy, cheekily on the back of his right paw, ‘Some not telling, paying for a secret stash’ and turning with a dash, ‘Go tell the Liberals that this Easter’ cries the GFEB.

The federal government buggered up the COVID-19 App over a year ago remember, with more than 6 million Australian subscribers, and it’s never worked since… Shhh! Don’t remind everyone, there’s an election coming woof woof.

‘Not a laughing matter’ claims the Easter Bunny, “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket like the Liberals do or you will find yourself in short supply’.

Fly, fly, GFEB must fly,

  happy Easter everyone,

must dash.

(The Liberal Easter Promise, AB)

 

Image from The Graphics Fairy (thegraphicsfairy.com)

 

Further references:

GPs say federal government has ‘set us up to fail’ on COVID-19 vaccine rollout – Sydney Morning Herald, 2 April 2021 https://www.smh.com.au/national/gps-say-federal-government-has-set-us-up-to-fail-on-covid-19-vaccine-rollout-20210401-p57fw4.html

4 ways Australia’s COVID vaccine rollout has been bungled – The Conversation, 1 April 2021 https://theconversation.com/4-ways-australias-covid-vaccine-rollout-has-been-bungled-158225

Coronavirus scares Easter Bunny away as chocolate sales wilt – Bloomberg, 20 April 2020 https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2020-04-10/coronavirus-scares-easter-bunny-away-as-chocolate-sales-wilt

 

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11 comments

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  1. Greg H

    Speaking of exaggerations divide 1.2 billion by 800,000 half price airfares.

  2. Jon Chesterson

    $1,500 if my maths is right. The naughts can be a little beguiling even when you subtract 3 zeros on either side. Tell us more Greg?

  3. ajogrady

    The L/NP could not run a bath let alone the country.

  4. Jon Chesterson

    ‘Happily, the Federal Government don’t deliver the Easter eggs, that’s my job’, GFEB! No JobKeeper this Easter, what about JobMaker, any candy there?

  5. paul walter

    It has occupied my imagination for several days, that the PM, so cavalier about when others get vaccinated, made sure he got his shots lightning quick enough tho…

  6. Bronte ALLAN

    Pity he did not get his shots of stryachanine instead. Then maybe we would be better off without this lying, flat earh, happy clapping, robo debt, spotrs rorts, friend of media barons, industrialists, retailers, pastoralists, failed in marketing fucking scum bag Slo Mo dick head bastard, Hawiian holiday man.. At the rate the vaccinatons are going (snail pace!) all Australians will be immunised sometime next year, bad luck about trying to stem the corona virus but! But why would he even care abouit all the ordinary Austalians, he has had his bloody jabs, the BASTARD Great article, Jon!

  7. Harry Lime

    Bronte,he is a disgusting,sad little man..To add insult to injury.it looks like our fourth rate pm and his fifth rate health minister(another weasely little bastard) have lumped us, the great unwashed,with a suspect vaccine.I noticed the Liar got the upmarket Pfizer jab,did they already know the Astrazeneca one was a bit dubious?And on it goes,giving incompetence and mediocrity a bad name.

  8. Mustafi

    Harry, as far as the PM and Health Minister are concerned there is no downside to force feeding the plebs Astrazeneca as the cost of extra adverse reactions are really potential profits for the Pharmafia industry in terms of repairing damaged bodies, so why can’t journalists see through this medical elitism or is it a matter of ignoring the obvious to hold onto a plum job and who to trust less – media or govt, it’s a conundrum.

  9. Jon Chesterson

    Our thoughts and prayers perhaps ought to go out to all Australians stranded overseas this Easter. Greg’s point I see alludes to the fact that while Morrison and Frydenberg scream on about their stimulation package, a half price fare from Melbourne to Goldcoast or Goldcoast to Sydney wouldn’t cost anywhere near $1500, so another rort there. So where is the rest of the money going – the most of it!

    Three airlines get a massive subsidy including Virgin, not Australian owned, after financial support was refused (quite rightly) last year and after it was sold and taken over by, help me out here someone? So what’s with the turnabout policy here? So what’s the bet, half of Federal Cabinet have invested in shares over night or a week or two earlier! Isn’t that what happened with AstraZeneca and CSL BioTech last year? No shares nor profit for the big boys in bringing Aussies home!

    So wealthy and comfortable off Aussies can live it up on the Goldcoast or Sydney this Easter, while rural Australia stays in the economic shadow and government drought; and no-one, PM included lifts a finger to bring Australian citizens home – Yup let them find an exorbitant flight home for $15,000 after they lost their jobs in the UK, US or chocolate coated Covid elsewhere. Remember, anyone stranded here lost their jobs too but JobKeeper and Seeker would not have covered them, so why would other countries give a damn about us.

    I don’t get it, Australians are not even kicking up a fuss about their own kind rotting overseas – Not all mind, but we are talking thousands here.

    What would it cost to send the Easter Bunny out on QANTAS to bring them all home – an absolute fraction of $1.2 billion. Even QANTAS could do this as a gesture of good will and Morrison should pay for the quarantine. I’d fly QANTAS again if they did that!

    ‘Me too’ snapped the GFEB, ‘Screw those eggs, give me a pair of wings, I’ll do it’ he cried not to minimise or make fun of such a noble, friendly cause, ‘Isn’t that what Easter is really about, helping others and giving them hope?’ – GFEB ghost of Easter past.

    Meanwhile the rest of us can hang loose another year till we get our vaccine and let’s give thought ir a choice for those with a heart conditions or clotting disorders – First case went to Hospital in Melbourne yesterday and was that 7 reported dead in the UK over night after receiving AZ.

    GFEB not happy!

  10. wam

    a rose by any other name would smell as sweet say bill.
    If we called fennel rose would it smell sweet
    Astra is not a vaccine so simply change the definition of a vaccine so that it is. QED
    I would have liked the pollies pfizer but I an full of blood thinner which I hpewill stop clots but my darling and family are not so they will wait.
    Either a new real vaccine or better astpfiz style will come the the family will line up.

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