Cigarettes, whiskey and electric cars

By 2353NM It’s all very well for us to say how much we…

All Judas Needed Was Channel 7! Hitler May…

‘McLachlan said he was frustrated that despite being “100 per cent acquitted”…

Tim Wilson epitomises so many things that are…

Two photographs taken by Alex Ellinghausen last week pretty much sum up…

Government does not go far enough on Aged…

The recent Budget announcements are a mixed bag for Aged Care. They represent a…

Jlem Violence Mars Holy Week for Jews, Muslims…

By Andrew Friedman and Khaled Elomar It would be hard to think of…

The budget: A layperson's dilemma

Before I even begin to comment on this year's budget, I must…

"Elbowed and Hustled": Australia’s Yellow Peril Problem

With the babble about Cold War paranoia becoming a routine matter in…

Scott Morrison’s “promise to Australia”

Scott Morrison’s 2019 election campaign speech: “To run a stronger economy requires a…

«
»
Facebook

Scott Morrison Knows Someone Who Can Change The World!

Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?’

‘That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,’ said the Cat.

‘I don’t much care where -‘ said Alice.

‘Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,’ said the Cat.

‘- so long as I get SOMEWHERE,’ Alice added as an explanation.

‘Oh, you’re sure to do that,’ said the Cat, ‘if you only walk long enough.”
– Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland / Through the Looking-Glass

Ok, consider this: your friend, Jane tells you about her new relationship. “It’s the real thing but we’re not ready to move in together or anything. We both want to lead independent lives.” Fair enough you think, but when you meet her again a few months later and ask how it’s going, she tells you that they’ve been talking about living together but there’s no rush. After a few years of this, she eventually tells you that moving in together isn’t all that important, but Scott is inching his way towards a commitment because he told her that a formal arrangement wasn’t necessary; the important thing is the relationship itself which is better than most people’s, and she’s sure that he’ll be happy to make some sort of promise in the future but at the moment it would cause problems with his wife.

Hands up, if you think Jane is fooling herself… Yep, thought so. The only people who didn’t put their hands up are the Canberra press gallery. Substitute “wife” for “backbench” and even they might get the allegory.

The idea that Morrison is “inching” towards a zero-emissions target does seem at odds with his most recent statements about it being performance rather than promises that count and how Australia delivers – or meets and beats – when it sets a target. If they think that’s moving toward a target they haven’t been paying attention to Scotty “I’m ambitious for this guy” Morrison!

With our PM, there’s frequently a qualifier in the promise and even more frequently, his inability to achieve something is usually glossed over in one of two ways:

  1. He uses some strange interpretation of what he previously said by concentrating on a couple of words or phrases in the original statement to explain that he’s actually done what he said he would. For example, promising that all Australians would be home by Christmas can be explained away by the fact that some Australians have now made their home overseas, so they can be considered home in London or New York or whatever city they currently reside in.
  2. He tells a Trump-like lie. For example, announcing that the vaccine roll-out was ahead of schedule.

Just recently, Morrison made some rather strange claims at a religious conference. Now before I start unpacking these, let me just say that I’m not trying to bully those who are religious. I’m all for religious tolerance. If someone wants to believe that they’re literally eating the flesh and drinking the blood of some guy who died two thousand years ago, I’m not going to get into a fight and suggest that this act of communion is more symbolic than literal just because I happen to have a different set of values. However, when someone argues that I need to allow them to practice their religion because it’s theirs and it involves loud chanting on my front lawn from sunset to sunrise, I think I have the right to tell them to bugger off, or else they may be a lot closer to finding enlightenment than they realise.

And so with our Part-time Mansplainer, I have a real concern that his decision to fly his/the taxpayers’ plane all the way to the conference in order to speak wasn’t all to do with his earthly duties. Of course, this is clearly something where the PM and I would disagree. He would argue that he was put there by God, so every action relates to his divine purpose and everything he does is part of that plan. I would argue that Morrison is full of shit because I’ve been put here by God to say exactly that.

Morrison told people that when he was contemplating his future electoral prospects he asked for a sign and God gave him one: he saw a soaring eagle. So this morning I asked for one too and the first thing that I saw was a dog defecating, so I presumed that God must want me to tell Scomoses that he’s full of shit. Still, the meaning of signs is in the eye of the beholder. How did he know that the eagle wasn’t a sign that he should follow the USA? How did I know that my sign wasn’t that I should watch my step?

Whatever, I find it worrying that our PM would announce to a crowd: “I said, I can’t fix the world. I can’t save the world, we both believe in someone who can”, and no, he wasn’t talking about Alan Jones. This certainly explains his reluctance to hold a hose, run quarantine, set climate targets, work weekends, organise vaccinations or meet with a delegation of women. (For a more comprehensive list of what Scotty doesn’t do, Nadine Von Cohen’s article examines them in detail.)

But perhaps even more worrying was this announcement:

I’ve been in evacuation centres, where people thought I was just giving someone a hug and I was praying. And putting my hands on people in various places, laying hands on them and praying in various situations.”

I don’t know about your professional life so maybe this doesn’t seem strange to you. However, unless you’re a doctor, a masseuse, a sex worker, or one of a very narrow range of professions, the idea of you “putting hands-on people in various places” while going about your job, does seem like it would lead to a conversation about appropriate behaviour, if not a whole milkshake being tossed in your face.

So maybe that’s his whole plan. He’s a “hands-on” PM who is hoping that by simply spending time in prayer (though definitely not the Prayer Room) and touching people occasionally that God will cast out the wicked Twitter from our land and climate change will be no more. Verily, we shall once again walk in the shadow of coal and fear it not, for Scott’s Twiggy and his staff shall comfort us and there will be a go for those who have a go…

Amen.

Like what we do at The AIMN?

You’ll like it even more knowing that your donation will help us to keep up the good fight.

Chuck in a few bucks and see just how far it goes!

Donate Button

38 comments

Login here Register here
  1. John Hanna

    Smuggo is such a wanker!!

  2. Harry Lime

    Anyone who didn’t already know we are misled by a prize fucking idiot ,should now be apprised of the reality.The fact that this galah remains in the driver’s seat tells us all about the lack of integrity in his passengers,after all, they’re only along for the ride…why rock the boat when you are wallowing in so much free money.
    This is going to end badly..for everybody.It’s obvious’ the laying on of hands’ includes himself.And far too often apparently.Where are the men in the white coats?

  3. Michael Taylor

    I got the soaring eagle too, Rossleigh. Probably because we don’t have a dog.

    Oh, hang on, it’s only a crow. ☹️

  4. GL

    I cannot express my joy in knowing the country is run in the safe hands of a no talent, rat cunning, right wing raving religious nutter who believes that Dog put him charge to save the nation. Very very scary.

  5. Henry Rodrigues

    He’s been laying his hands on that appendage hanging in front below his navel. That’s his problem. He’s a bloody wanker, he’s says so himself. We’re being led by wankers and arseholes.

  6. Doctor Wu

    My word Rossleigh, that was a long-overdue denunciation of the clique of god-botherers who presently run the show here in Oz. [Applause.] It might also have been relevant to cite a later, but probably less known, comment on Alice et al which admonished,

    “When logic and proportion
    Have fallen sloppy dead
    And the white knight is talking backwards
    And the Red Queen’s “off with her head!”
    Remember what the dormouse said
    Feed your head …”

    Sadly for all of us and the planet, “Scomoses” is feeding his head with the drivel that tongues speak. He translates that into our dialect of English, but it loses something in the rendering – credibility and relevance.

    Another observation that a skeptic might note is the eagle that “Scomoses” reported having shown him an unmistakable omen. Romans of the First Republic were big believers in omens. They too observed the behaviour of eagles – and the patterns apparently formed by sacrificial entrails, perhaps their animal version of Robodebt victims – but the Romans were firmly rooted in what was the real empirical world of the time. They knew that many wars and states had been lost because supplicants did not pay Delphi a sufficiently big inducement, and believed what they chose from the oracle’s cryptic pronouncements. So the Romans usually gave some thought to other, more efficient and reliable ways of managing the state.

    Apologies for my Territory crudity, but the only thing Scomoses” is laying his hands on is his component of the “swinging dick”.

  7. Phil Pryor

    My comments within “is it the truth” here are enough to illustrate complete comtempt for masturbatory misfit political perverts whose hands are on the todger of self deception. Mr. Scott Hollow-Whorebrain is leading Australia astray. Superstition SUCKS…

  8. AI

    A Michael Moore doco from 2020 ‘Planet of the Humans’ elicited this comment: “Green energy is not an attempt to save the planet—but to save our lifestyles. Wealth. Capitalism itself” Look at where the UN Sustainable Goals sees the world by 2050. Aussies will not be an outlier group driving petrol cars to the local Maccas for a hamburger. Meat will be off the menu and petrol a thing of the past. So why is the LNP delaying? Is the plan to trick retail Super Funds into buying old tech companies before pulling the rug? There are no adults in charge, only children playing games.

  9. Matt Synnott

    A very big worry and wonder is that so many, so many people think he is great, how can that be, are they in a parallel universe? They might deserve this cretin, I certainly don’t, It was/is the same in the U.S. so many people think these dangerous idiots are our saviors. Trump I believe, was their worst president, maybe equal worst, OK? Scotty from marketing is our worst P. M. and the bench mark had been set pretty high by previous title holders, I thought Abbott’s hold on the top spot was assured but I was wrong. Then it was not like there was great pool of worthy contenders for the job, what a bunch of self serving, dishonest parasites that we are afflicted with.
    I wish I had confidence in the good sense of enough voters to see this lot tossed to hell come the next election, sadly recent history causes me to worry.
    What would it take to convince enough of us to rid our land of this pestilance, are there really so many people so blind that they just tick the box of the same party every time without regard to performance, do they believe that this bunch of lying toerags offer the best hope for our country’s and the earth’s future, give me strength?

  10. Frank Smith

    And of course ScoMoses “best happy-clapper mate” Stewy Roberts of Robodebt fame also got honorable mention at this revealing event. The utter hypocrisy of these smirking incompetent fools has no bounds. God Help Us! Get away, don’t you dare lay your filthy hands on me!

  11. Josephus

    This is terrifying , being led by nutters who imagine they matter to some god who is very obviously either indifferent or who is sending us all the plagues he or she can to get rid of us. There is simply no evidence that this being lerves us. Tell that to my godloving grandparents breathing in the sodium cyanide. Makes me vomitous.

  12. Jon Chesterson

    Judas Morrison wouldn’t know what truth and integrity is and he certainly doesn’t know anyone who could change the world, even if his life depended on it! And as far as his laying on of hands are concerned, they are as black as coal where they come from.

  13. Florence Howarth

    Doesn’t Morrison know PM’s can and do change the world? It can be for good or evil. evil. Sadly this PM is delivering little more than evil.

  14. Terence Mills

    This reminds me of 2016 when pro Trump supporters blitzed social media saying the Pope had endorsed Donald Trump for President – this could have delivered him many millions of votes.
    There are roughly 51 million Catholic adults in the U.S., accounting for about one-fifth of the total U.S. adult population, according to Pew Research .

    So if the Liberals are claiming God for their side where does that leave Labor ?

  15. David Stakes

    Did not take long for him to come out and start preaching, these types see it as their duty. To try and convert peope. Will most disregard this as an attempt at conversion, and despatch it into the nutter file. Or will they fall for it because its the PM. MSM are failing as well on calling this out for what it is.

  16. Jack sprat

    He is a all powerful and loving God, but he is not very good with money.He always seems to need more.

  17. GL

    He also seems to have all but declared that social media could be used by Peter Dut…I mean Satan to undermine the country.

    “Prime Minister Scott Morrison has suggested social media could be used by “the evil one” to undermine Australian society, telling Christian leaders they are what the country needs right now.”

    https://www.smh.com.au/national/pm-gives-rare-insight-into-pentecostal-faith-says-social-media-being-used-by-evil-one-20210426-p57mkb.html

    This is taking his lunacy to a whole new level. Trump pretended to be a “man of faith” to garner votes and play to the evangelicals idiot belief systems. Scotty, on the other hand, is a fanatical religious nutcase and is therefore more dangerous.

  18. Diane Larsen

    Religion is like a disease it targets the thinking part of the brain rendering logical thought processes incompatible with reality it infects some and leaves others alone, unfortunately the infection (brainwashing) usually starts in childhood by those who have been infected (radicalised) to bring up another generation of those afflicted, by those who have had logic removed from their thought processes, if this is not bad enough you then have the outriders who don’t necessarily believe the dogma but advance the system as a form of power over the afflicted.
    How do we fight this disease we could try to ignore them and hope they go away but that seems to encourage them to become more virulent, maybe some sort of shock treatment especially those in our current government in need of re-education on morals, empathy and doing the bloody job they are being paid for but I fear only a major hit to their confidence in their belief system would have any effect (2 seats left in WA😊) Scotty and his religious followers need to stop praying and preaching and start working in the interest of this country or go join a monastery separated by high walls and locked gates where they can speak in tongues to each other and stop buggering up the country for their own selfish reasons and practise their love of corruption in the veggie patch(who gets to rule on water allotment) and candle distribution for reading (no solar for you guys) and of course coal for heating (chocking air quality maybe your god can save you). Here endoth the lesson.

  19. Dave G.

    Morrison is free to believe whatever he wants,fair enough but when his beliefs are translated into the job given him by the mainly unbelieving electorate it becomes very worrying.There is no place for any religious belief in governing a country.

  20. ajogrady

    Religion is the advertising agency for a unproven and non existent product and Scott Morrison is the marketing guy.
    For some, religion is the cloak they wear to disguise their evil and corrupt behaviour as Morrison and his ministers do on a daily basis.
    Religion is the curse that stalks the gullible, the weak and the vulnerable in other words the poor that in turn are manipulated by the wealthy for for their own ends. Blind faith is responsible for the elimination of reason and logic from those afflicted with the belief in false promises whilst living in a fools paradise. It is fallacious by definition and a curse not a cure for what are mankind’s failings.
    Being contemptuous, contentious, contempable, arrogant and dismissive is not leadership. Scott Morrison is a reflection of him and his parties absolute corosive and corrupt poor governance standards that is regularly evident when ever one of the other failures in his party is found to be wanting in their respective portfolios. Corrupt and calamitous sums up the failed Morrison experience.
    In particular Scott Morrison believes that success is the ability to go from one total failure to another total failure with no loss of enthusiasm or any sign of a guilty conscience or any shame.

  21. Vikingduk

    Praise be, sinners, saint scotty of the sanctimonious smirk, the liar from the shire is here to ooze its copious amounts of compassion, to osmotically spread its empathy by laying its greasy, hypocrisy stained paws on the unsuspecting. Hallelujah, brothers and sisters, that chronic masticating mastibator or is that masturcating masturbator or we just keep it simple, that shit eating wanker, is here to save our earthly persons armed with the will of god? Dog? Jebus?

    Meanwhile, the nsw cops, moving at speed, easily matched by a dead snail, continue to investigate houston we have a problem, five years so far, to decide if this alleged fucking deadbeat drop kick allegedly lied to protect his alleged kiddy fiddling father, allegedly. Even though he admitted as much in tv interview, allegedly.

    So, all allegeds have been well covered, the smirk and mirrors delusional wanker continues on its blissfully ignorant way, rotten to the core, reeking of lies and rat cunning.

    And people vote for it.

  22. Harry Lime

    Brer Morrison must be feeling the pinch,or an election coming on,to publicly proclaim he’s doing God’s work experience.Were the gullible subject to the bite to further such a worthy cause?Thoughts and prayers to keep the good and faithful servant unwavering in his mission to be re elected? Fuck the sick,the poor and the downtrodden,they didn’t have a go.Did he ask for divine inspiration for another assembly line of lies?Which begs the question,how does anyone that supports him square up with his non stop,blatantly egregious lying?

  23. Kerri

    Watched that whole video and yeah! Super creepy and incredibly self congratulatory whilst feigning humility.
    The world needs less religion not more.
    And maybe with less religion we could get rid of incompetent, serial clusterf**ks like his mate Stewey.

  24. Henry Rodrigues

    These dickheads have picked up Trump’s propensity to claim divine approval for bullshitting every time they open their foul mouths. The tradition started by the rodent, slavishly followed by jug ears and now the lying bastard from the shire maintains it in full public view. Halleluyah ratbags !!!!

  25. Jon Chesterson

    @Harry – Can we stick his bloody hands back to the tar baby and call in Brer Wolf and Brer Eagle to stop the virtual and virtuous bunny-hugging?

  26. Harry Lime

    Jon,Capital idea.

  27. wam

    We are doomed said hanrahan if we cannot question religion. I had a facebook go about scummo’s belief that god put him PM and he can do whatever he fuken likes because god wills it. When I concluded that he should give examples of how the evil one is controlling facebook I got an answer: ‘by using people like you, wam’ I have avoided the bolt from above so far because god cannot actually do anything, except give the word..
    However, it is nothing but exorcism for you and some others, rossleigh,.

  28. Terence Mills

    I see that George Christensen is dropping out of politics – I hate to think that he has been promised a job as our next ambassador to the Philippines……………………….is there no God !

    He is quitting because of :

    “Issues like enshrining religious liberty, protecting the unborn, ensuring freedom of speech, including online free speech.

    “Installing cheap coal-fired power so we can support jobs, ensuring we keep Australian land and strategic assets out of the hands of the Chinese Communist Party and preferably in Australian hands, and many other key conservative issues.

    He didn’t mention the inconvenience of having to be in Australia from time to time for parliamentary sittings but I’ve no doubt that comes into it.

    It would seem that he hasn’t been paying attention as most of the things he holds dear are also those shared by his mates Morrison and Stuart Robert.

    Kevin Rudd has raised an interesting point on the cancellation of Victoria’s Belt and Road memorandum of understanding with the Chinese. He has noted that if this wasn’t just a cheap shot at Premier Daniel Andrews – they call him Chairman Dan – then they will equally need to cancel the Darwin port lease as that too is part of the Belt and Road Initiative.

    But then again maybe it was just a cheap shot at Andrews.

    Incidentally, when Scottie was talking about the Evil One I thought he was referring to Spud Dutton – I’ll probably be sued now !

  29. GL

    Terence,

    I beat you to it so I will probably be sued before you.

  30. Consume Less

    Think I prefer daggy dad scomo over god bothering scomo.

  31. Max Gross

    I reckon Morrison is insane. That is all.

  32. Brozza

    I saw recently someone referring to the prime moron as a “death cult acolyte’. A pretty apt description of someone relying on the death of the planet to bring on the ‘rapture’ and only save ‘those who have a go’. “How good is climate change eh?”
    A couple of years ago I couldn’t believe it was possible for there to be a worse pm than a-butt(head), but I was wrong.
    scummo makes the mad monk appear almost slightly lucid.

  33. Zathras

    Believing in fairies and goblins is one thing but to convince yourself that you are engaged in conversation with a hallucination takes delusion to another level.

    How is this different from the Trump notion of believing yourself to be “the Chosen One?”

  34. B Sullivan

    “I’m all for religious tolerance.”

    Do you know what the word religious actually means? I’ll give you a clue. It is derived from the Latin word for tying up. For binding. Are you really all for tolerance of a mindset that restricts freedom of conscience? A mindset that is bound not by knowledge, facts or reality, but by by blind unquestioned faith, also known as confidence, a state of ignorance maintained if necessary by denial.

    It is odd that we blame thousands of years of countless wars, murders, tortures and social persecution and oppression on religious intolerance instead of where the blame really lies – with religious indulgence. Faith by its very nature can only exist in ignorance of the truth. It is this state of willful ignorance that limits the religious in their tolerance of people’s behaviour. Not because the behaviour is particularly unacceptable, but because their particular beliefs do not allow them to accept such behaviour at all. And perversely, they refer to their bondage as religious freedom, e.g. the freedom to discriminate against homosexuals.

    That being said, I doubt that most people who claim to be religious these days really do allow themselves to be bound by the beliefs professed by whatever religion they feel attached to. Secular states are preferred to theocratic statics wherever freedom of choice is permitted. Religious tolerance, like tolerance for slavery and tolerance for the oppression of women, is thank goodness in decline.

  35. Canguro

    From today’s Guardian:

    Morrison, asked about the possibility that vulnerable Australians in India could die during the health crisis, said: “That is the nature of a global pandemic – that is why we have been repatriating citizens.”

    “I don’t see those Australians of Indian heritage as a problem we have to solve, not at all, and I am concerned that’s how some may have been seeing this,” he said. “These are Australians and Australian residents who need our help and we intend to ensure that we are able to restore, particularly the repatriation flights, and that those repatriation flights focus on the most vulnerable.”

    The man of God speaks.

  36. wam

    more announcements from scummo with the only lnp pollie sombre in the photos, the absence of 75% of the NT pollies showed announcements are not for labor and scummo’s god is not for labor. Any idea who voted the government access to unlimited money for rorts and war?? Wonder if we will ever know the nature of the bribe? Perhaps it was another loonie brainfart

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

The maximum upload file size: 16 MB. You can upload: image, audio, video, document, spreadsheet, interactive, text, archive, code, other. Links to YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and other services inserted in the comment text will be automatically embedded.

Return to home page
Scroll Up
%d bloggers like this: