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Scott Morrison Cancels Government!

Right, just remember that you read it here first.

Any day now, ScoBro will cancel the government. I mean, they can’t go all the way to May of next year without everyone noticing that the only reason for replacing Turnbull was that Rupert Murdoch said so, and Morrison and company are having trouble working out what to do because Rupert hasn’t actually given them any specific instructions. And to think it’s the Americans worried about foreigners interfering with the democratic processes.

(As an aside, I’m calling Rupert Murdoch a foreigner because he’s a citizen of the USA, having renounced his Australian citizenship. Yep, he can’t be an actual MP. If anyone tells me that he was born in Australia so he’s Australian, I hope they’re not the same people who told me that I can’t keep saying that I couldn’t call Tony Abbott English.)

Lately, the Liberals have been changing their minds even more often than they’ve changed their Prime Ministers. Let’s look at all the cancellations and sudden changes over the past few weeks.

  1. Parliament was cancelled so that the leadership could be sorted out.
  2. Malcolm Turnbull’s leadership was cancelled
  3. The Emissions Reductions part of the NEG was cancelled
  4. The Guarantee part of the NEG was cancelled.
  5. The NEG itself was cancelled.
  6. Malcolm Turnbull resigned as an MP
  7. The investigation into bullying was cancelled because those women decided that they weren’t being bullied after talking to the PM.
  8. Scott cancelled COAG telling us that this would only lead to less TimTams being eaten in Canberra. (This is an actual statement of his, in case you think that I’m just making a pathetic joke!)
  9. The Coalition cancelled the idea of the Westminister system where misleading Parliament was a sackable offence by deciding that Peter Dutton didn’t actually mislead Parliament because when he said he didn’t know the people requesting special treatment with the au pairs, Dutton was using “know” in the Biblical sense.
  10. The announcement of an extra $4,000,000,000 to the private schools cancelled the whole idea of needs based funding in education and any idea that the Liberals actually believe in a fair go. Unless, of course, you “have a go” by hiring a lobby group to ensure that you get one.
  11. And today, our decisive PM changed his plans at the last minute and didn’t appear at press conference in Wentworth which Kerry Phelps gatecrashed. It must have been last minute because it caught the Liberal candidate by surprise.

So, it seems only reasonable to presume that Scott will announce that he can’t continue with such an obstructist Parliament where he keeps having women wear red and people moving no confidence motions. He’ll claim that an election will give us all fresh air and it’s the one sure way to unite everyone behind Rupert.


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  1. pierre wilkinson

    “So, it seems only reasonable to presume that Scott will announce that he can’t continue with such an obstructist Parliament where he keeps having women wear red and people moving no confidence motions. He’ll claim that an election will give us all fresh air and it’s the one sure way to unite everyone behind Rupert.”
    spot on, with an ego magnified by divine acclamation, scummo will fall for the first chance he sees to ward off dutto….
    we wish

  2. Matters Not


    the Americans worried about foreigners interfering with the democratic processes.

    More specifically, they are concerned with collusion. And if they want a definition just refer them to Rupert and Kerry – who are experts in the field.

    But never mind. In Australia the ”separation of powers” doctrine always had a peculiar meaning.

  3. Max Gross

    At the earliest opportunity voters will cancel the LNP (I won’t call it a government because it is obviously not governing).

  4. New England Cocky

    Rossleigh strikes again!!! Well done!! Thank you!!

    Looking forward to the first opportunity to cancel this Liarbral Notional misgovernment.

    With Benito “knowing” au pairs, naturally (only in the Biblical sense, of course) Australia has been well and truly f@@ked over by these self-serving egomaniacs … that Australian voters elected to political office.

    If there was ever any doubt that s44 was written into the Constitution to protect Australian democracy from foreign interference, then even Blind Freddie can see that since the 2010 election the dead hand of foreigners (Muloch??) using foreign agents (RAbbott??) has created chaos and “corrupted” the best interests of Australia voters for the benefit of a minute coven of entrenched backward “unthinkers”. The possibility of this situation was foreseen by the Constitution authors.

  5. Terence Mills

    As noted in Crikey the Senate ran out of legislative business this week as the lack of policy direction of the Morrison government became painfully apparent : not only was the scheduled Council of Australian Governments (COAG) meeting cancelled but it was a circus in the Senate – this from Crikey :

    For example, the government spent two days debating its own bill tackling the black economy, even though the bill was supported by Labor. When Labor moved to force a vote, the government bizarrely voted against the motion. This effectively meant they voted against passing their own bill, in order to keep debate on foot. Another bill, concerning enhancing ASIC’s capabilities, saw five government senators speak in its favour, compared to one from Labor, even though the opposition also supported the bill.

    On Wednesday, the government took the unusual step of putting the Governor-General’s address-in-reply from 2016 on the agenda. This was, according to the opposition, essentially another measure to stop parliament running out of business.

    ALP Senator Alex Gallacher said the address-in-reply only comes up “when you’re a little bit thin on legislation”. Victorian Labor Senator Jacinta Collins condemned the move as “simply filling the void in the government’s agenda”. Ironically enough, the Governor-General’s address, which was made in 2016, outlined the Turnbull government’s agenda. It mentions issues such as tax cuts (now shelved), and same-sex marriage (now belatedly passed). But that government, and their to-do list, are now both gone.

  6. Terence Mills

    And this :

    “In the government party room on Tuesday Morrison told incredulous members that “we have momentum”. One quipped later: “Yeah, the sort of momentum you get when you jump off a cliff.”

    Australia, we need an election desperately !

  7. Kyran

    “Any day now, ScoBro will cancel the government.”
    With respect, Mr Brisbane, do you have any evidence that we have had government in the past five years? Empirical, anecdotal, scientific, circumstantial, demonstrative, direct, documentary, etcetera.

    You get the drift. Heck, even hearsay. Is there any evidence of even the most paltry standard that we have had government in the past five years? Clearly, any discussion about ‘good government’ is an exercise in something between fanciful, delusional and aspirational (in any event, fictional).
    The extension is, therefore, how can he cancel something that does not exist? It’s not like we are talking about mythical gods, whose non-existence seems occasionally to warrant extensive discussion. All of which is demonstrably theoretical, as there is no evidence they have ever existed. This is government. Unlike the gods, there is evidence that, once upon a time, it DID exist.
    As to your list of what this non-government has dispensed with;
    “#9 The Coalition cancelled the idea of the Westminister system where misleading Parliament was a sackable offence…”
    Frydenberg, the current treasurer, is in a spot of bother. Not about his citizenship, which no-one seems to want to mention, let alone discuss. The thingy about misleading parliament and ‘due diligence’. Mind you, discussions of ‘due diligence’ and this non-government are somewhat problematic, albeit theoretical. Remember the business about granting some money to ‘scientific research’?
    “His statement came after six hours of hearings on Friday again failed to establish who had the original idea to award the grant, and finance, environment and Treasury officials repeatedly refused to answer questions about the grant process, claiming cabinet and budget confidentiality.
    In a statement to the Senate committee, the secretary of the Department of Environment and Energy, Finn Pratt, said “there is much interest in due diligence” undertaken for the grant, which was offered during a private meeting between the former prime minister Malcolm Turnbull, the then environment and energy minister Josh Frydenberg and the foundation’s chair, John Schubert.”
    Frydenberg said there was ‘due diligence’, the recipients said there wasn’t. His own department reinvented the infamous ‘unknown unknowns’ theorem.
    “It is incorrect to assume that because the foundation was unaware of the department’s due diligence work that no due diligence took place before the offer to the foundation was made.”
    So, if a tree falls in the woods and no-one hears it, …….
    “Frydenberg told the parliament in August that the government had undertaken a two-stage due diligence process.
    “I read that statement a couple of times, Mr Pratt, and felt like he said it was a department decision,” Whish-Wilson said.
    Pratt responded: “Well, can I reassure you that the department does not make decisions, the government makes decisions”.”

    “#10 … whole idea of needs based funding in education …”
    The current PM says the ‘suburban’ component of the new funding arrangement IS needs based. It NEEDS to address how the income of parents is relative to a child’s education.
    “The government is providing Catholic and independent schools $3.2 billion over 10 years to fund changes to the way parents’ wealth is measured, based on income tax data.”
    As for the ‘regional’ component of the new funding, that was specifically drought related.
    “An extra $1.2 billion will go to “address specific challenges” in those schools, but Scott Morrison rejected suggestions it was a slush fund to get the Catholics off his back politically.
    “I think that’s a pretty unkind and cynical way to look at it,” he told reporters in Sydney on Friday.
    “(Right now) it’s going to help those Catholic schools to provide fee relief for kids from drought-affected areas so they don’t have to leave the school.
    “So that sounds like a pretty good reason to do it to me”.”

    Naturally, no mention was made as to how many of these catholic schools there were in drought affected areas, but there must be a lot to warrant a billion dollars (presumably to be stripped from the un-needy, like welfare recipients other than religious institutions, like hospitals and the unemployed).
    As for Mr Mills suggestion the senate was a circus running out of things to do, the clown leader had an urgent motion which the senate was too busy to deal with.
    “The One Nation leader says there has been a ‘deplorable rise of anti-white racism’.”
    The deplorables want to discuss the deplorable. As one of those mean, white racists picking on other whites, I was somewhat confused with this one.
    “One Nation leader Pauline Hanson has moved a motion asking the Senate to acknowledge a “rise of anti-white racism” and that it is “okay to be white”.
    Senator Hanson said the motion was inspired by the “huge overreaction” to a T-shirt worn by Canadian far-right activist Lauren Southern on her recent Australian tour.
    “If the Senate won’t agree to this then we have to admit Australia truly has an anti-white racism problem,” Senator Hanson wrote on Twitter.”

    The only bit she left out was that I’m one of the white racists picking on white racists. Unlike HER, I’m a HIM, which gives me privilege beyond hers. She really should go back to the (fish and chip) kitchen.
    Thank you Mr Brisbane and commenters. Any assistance regarding my confusion about these points would be greatly appreciated. You know, please explain? Take care

  8. Adrianne Haddow

    If one is the PM of Australia, and has children attending a religious/independent (ha ha ha) school, and the government you ‘lead’ awards $4.6 billion in funding for that so-called independent education sector, and many of your ministers have children attending such schools, does that constitute a conflict of interest?

    Or is it the same situation as Gestapotato’s childcare centres’ funding, and au pair visa preferences ?
    Still nothing to see here. Look at Bill Shorten.

    The Guardian’s First Dog on the Moon has an excellent cartoon about the latest education funding theft.

  9. Henry Rodrigues

    Well I didn’t ever think I’d see the day that some MSM journos will have gained some courage to call out that bastard Murdoch and hopefully they’ll continue to get stuck into him at every opportunity. Its time we rid ourselves of this meddlesome SOB who thinks he is emperor of Australia, and the shameful coalition who bow down to him, aided and abetted by the those obnoxious loudmouth ratbags in the media. These fools are in for a mighty surprise come the elections, the depth of rage out there in the community especially among voters who are not normally vocal, but the past few weeks was the last straw. One usually sedate doctor said he was preparing to a take a baseball bat and that the coalition better be prepared for a wipeout. ScumMo is in for a shellacking.

  10. Ross in Gippsland

    Well at least its official now. Rupert Murdoch decides who governs Australia and how long they will govern. Although you would think the public scoffs at such an absurdity.
    Labor will know they have three years after the election to seriously do over Rupert and break up News Corpse if they want to govern longer.
    This presupposes Rupert lives that long and Labor’s Border Farce let him back in country.

  11. Bilal

    I thought that Howard was the pits until Tony came along. Then there was Morrison. It can only get worse so Dutton will be next.

    Lord Moloch is delivering very bad government to this country. Perhaps even some of his minions recognise that we have to protect ourselves from the suffocating grip of the Institute for Paid Advocacy and its funders.

  12. helvityni

    …I don’t care what youse all are saying, Scott’s doin’ no wrong by me; he kicks the ball, and you know he’s friendly, none of them airs and graces, no fancy suits like them Keatings and Turnbulls have, he’s one of us, a real bloke’s bloke…none of that LQBT nonsense either…go back to Europe if you want some sissy clown running this bloody best country in the world…I told Selma to go back to her kitchen when she started jabbering about ‘what about Julie’…Julie/ Julia, all the same, they just want to be skinny…spend money on their hair and dresses….

  13. Clive Manson

    Thank you for the headline. I might not have noticed.

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