The AIM Network

Scott Morrison And The Ministry Of Information And Stuff That We Should Believe…

Gladys Berejiklian shows she knows Morrison will push her under a bus.

In a crisis, good information is paramount so it’s really lucky that this isn’t a crisis.

Just in case you’re confused, it’s not a crisis because we have everything on target and going to plan and now, we have a four phase plan which describes what will happen in the future assuming that it does. Added to this we now have some army guys running “Operation Covid Shield” which aims to shield the Prime Minister from any awkward questions by having the generals answer them. General Frewen announced in June that we were having a “complete refresh” which is army talk for: ‘’We just sustained a series of heavy defeats so we’re pretending that our strategy of retreat and surrender is part of a new plan for victory.”

But I think you’ll all agree that it’s good to have the army in charge… Well, not in charge. There hasn’t been a military coup, in spite of Dutton being Defence Minister. The vaccine rollout had been in the hands of private companies but like the Covid-Safe App and JobKeeper, it soon became apparent that this was only fifty percent effective. While it didn’t actually help with the battle against Covid-19, it did manage to transfer money from the pockets of the government into private industry which – as anyone following the Liberals knows – it’s better that people have the money rather than governments.

To illustrate this you only have to look at the Great Barrier Reef foundation who were given nearly half a billion dollars without asking for it, or the Car Park scheme where money was allocated for a car park next to a non-existent train station. You wouldn’t get private industry spending money like that. No, as the Liberals keep telling us, don’t trust us with anything, we’re incompetent! Well, they don’t say it quite like that, but they tell us that governments can’t be trusted to be efficient, even when they’re the government.

Anyway, back to the importance of information in battling Covid-19. Let’s clearly set it all out:

  1. Lockdowns are bad for the economy and we need to work to avoid them, and the Prime Minister says Gladys is wonderful because she’s managed to do just that.
  2. In order to stop lockdowns you need to get vaccinated.
  3. People aren’t getting vaccinated because there’s some confusion about the fact that they can’t book in unless they see their doctor and if they’re under sixty lots of doctors are telling them that they’d be better to wait for the Pfizer dose which is coming in millions of doses in the coming months.
  4. Scott Morrison’s office leaks to journalists that he was the one who encouraged Gladys to lockdown.
  5. More than half of Australia’s population is in lockdown, so you need to consider asking your doctor again about Astra-Zeneca because things have changed.
  6. We need to get more people vaccinated to get the economy moving.
  7. Brendan Murphy and the PM are telling us that more vaccinations wouldn’t have stopped the current lockdowns anyway because Delta is happening in other countries who have a much better vaccine rollout…
  8. By much better vaccine rollout, it should be made very clear that they only had a better rollout because they weren’t victims of their own success like we were and they thought it was a race.
  9. It wasn’t a race but now it is and we have to catch up, so will someone do a story about the restorative power of curries when it comes to hair growth?

I think that’s about it.

Quotes from the movie, Forrest Morrison:

“Life is like a box of chocolates because you never know what you’re getting unless you look at the bottom of the box and then all the chocolates fall out.” – Scotty

”Listen, you promise me something, OK? Just if you’re ever in trouble, don’t be brave. You just run, OK? Just run away.” – Jenny

“I may not be a smart man, Jenny, but I know what polls are.” Scotty

”Run, Scotty, run!” Rupert Murdoch

”Stupid is as, stupid does.” Barnaby Joyce.

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