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A letter to the Editor, from Morrie Moneyweather.

I didn’t think I would ever do this again because the last time I wrote none of you ungratefull bastards appreciated the wisdom of my words. All yous could do was have a go at me gramma. Even after me sons final year English class at Melbourne Gramma proofed it.

Anyway Im upset, again about the dispectfull way in which your writers are treating one of the finest prime ministers we have ever had. Even to the point of commenting on his receeding hair. No bloody wonder hes loosing it with all the crap he has to take. I meam Juliar also had a hair problem.

I agree with Chris Kenny. Quote:

“For all the coalitions failings and missteps it is surely incontestable that Tony Abbott has provided the best 16 months of government Australia has seen in 7 years.”
Absolutely incontestable.

You can do as many fact checks as you want but they will never be a substitute for the truth.

I mean look at some of the things he has done. Hes put Bronnie in charge of the house and made the whole thing more equitable (did ya like that word) and fairer. Now she is a women with balls and is displaying an unbiased approach to the job that has been lacking with Labor speakers.

And with a cabinet shuffle hes fixed the sexual imbalance.

Just before I go on. I read that piece by John Lord; “Why are the Right so Feral?”

Fair dinkum. He wouldn’t know shit from clay. I’d suggest he takes a hold of himself. Surely it’s clear to everyone that we need to be free to pursue wealth. I mean I needed the freedom to accept my inheritance. The same with Gina. There will always be haves and have nots. Lifters and leaners as Joe calls them. Even Jesus said that. And Ronald Regan said. If we keep giving more money to the rich, everyone will have more money. It’s called tickle down economics.

And all this shit about the budget being unfair.

It wasn’t it was just misunderstood. Joe was just sayin that the poor and middle classes had to support the rich. Christ anyone can understand that.
It was the fairest budget in fifty years. I mean what choice did Joe have? Someone has to pay to balance the books and it shouldn’t be those creating the wealth. People need to understand the stress involved in wealth creation.

Conservatives were born to control capitol. Labour comes after capital. Not everyone can be effluent. Had we had less regulation and let market forces have their way we wouldn’t have had a Global Financial Crisis. Now look at the mess Tony has to get the world out of.

Oh and another thing. At the risk of repeating myself. I didn’t appreciate all the sarcastic remarks from those people last time. Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.I can only say that good manners is a basic tenant of conservation. And women should be obscene and not heard.

Now where was I? Yes? There is no inequity in society. It’s just that some deserve more than others. We were born to rule. If we don’t have poor people who’s going to do the work.

That’s why I admire Christopher Pyne. It talks a lot of courage to do what hes doin even if I don’t understand what it is. I mean two many educated people can be dangerous for society.

They might all want to be wealthy.

And we don’t tell lies.

And talking about lies. How stupid people can be. Have a read of this letter I found in the AGE. I mean really.

“Some time back Tony Abbott told us that the best way to understand the truth of what he was saying was to have it in writing. Otherwise what he was saying was just idle chatter for an audience. So now I’m a little confused. You see now he is saying that what I thought he said is only a figment of my imagination. That what I think I thought he meant is not what he meant at all. That when he says something and I take it to mean one thing he has the option of saying that what I thought I heard was not what I heard at all. It was only my interpretation of what he meant. I mean, did he say what he meant or did he mean to say what he meant or was what he meant really what he meant.
I know that I am 75 and I have the odd senior moment but usually I know what I mean and what is meant by what I say. I also know that people understand what I’m meaning.

The silly confused old fart must be suffering from dementia.”

And all that nonsense about knighthoods. He should have given John Howard one too. He would have appreciated it for sure. I mean really think about the contribution Philip has made to our country. I mean really think it if your capable. And I’m sure Philip will keep up the good work. When and if we see him.

Anyhow I think all the writers on this blog show such little respect for Tony its just revolting. I think you’re that dumb that you must be three bricks short of a load or not the full two bobs worth. Either that or your three sanwhiches short of a picnic.

And most of the comments have to be a joke – no-one can be that stupid and arrogant, unless they are members of the Greens.

And that fellow. Ive forgotton what his name is. Your comment about me being a lesbeim was despickable. I could describe you as a pain in the neck but I have a much lower opinion of you.

There were so manny comments regarding mylast letter. All of them in such poor taste that I feel I cannot avail myself to share my wisdom with you again. I can only hope and pray that someday the working classes will come to their senses and show their appreciation for the effluence we share.

I think you are all so mean that if I paid you a compliment you would probably ask for a receipt.

So stick it up ya jumpa.

Morrie Moneyweather from Malvern.

PS Tony is the best thing to ever happen to this country. So tell the person who runs this sight that he needs a manager. Hes been handlin himself to long. Good government started last week. Cant remember the exact date.

12 comments

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  1. RenounceTA

    Dead set Morrie Moneyweather posts at the Drum every day under different names.

    My cousin was recently sacked from the ABC he is in his late 50s and wont get another job. His mother has voted Liberal all her life, I asked her if she could see the connection between voting Liberal and her son now being out of work. Of course not, it was Labors fault.

  2. J Marsh

    Luv satire!

  3. stephentardrew

    Bazoom John.

    Language is a game that can be played at many levels. People can say great stuff without high levels of literacy. The amazing thing is we have evolved the ability to read coherence into a jumbled of letters in words as long as the first and last letter are right. Evolution doesn’t ask for proper spelling and punctuation it opts for comprehension (you know survival strategy and all that) and is therefore much less anal retentive. As one who has had difficulties I can only feel sympathy for those who,through physical, psychological, intellectual or even time constraints, make mistakes. We want social justice not spelling bees.

    As for saying one won’t read an article because of poor spelling or punctuation that is no more than arrogance elitist bullshit.

    I wan’t to hear how people feel not how well they spell.

    A little tolerance goes a long way.

    Love the cheeky bits but ya know sorta what I mean mate.

    Wotcha gunna do about that literacy police?

  4. Blanik

    F**k the litrasy plise. So to speak!

  5. hforward22

    Very funny Morrie. Needed a good laugh.

  6. Peter F

    Well done Morrie, I think Alice would agree with you.

  7. keerti

    or you can just point at the bastards and larf! What other c’ntry would have a chief executiv displaying his toy’s in budgie smugglers?

  8. Annie B

    One helluva good laugh I had John ……. ta muchly. ( needed it today ).

    And yeah wot’s literacy got to do wif anything ?…. For the porpoise of the exercise …… nuffin.

    ,,,,,,

    @ Renounce TA …. On a serious note, I am sorry to hear that your son lost his job at the ABC – that’s awful – but you are right – it’s all Labors’ fault ……… Everything is Labor’s fault.

    I do hope he does get another job somewhere – sooner than later. …. he most likely has much to offer.

    Well – we shall see about how much is “Labors’ fault” – eventually, when the sums are added up….. !!!

  9. corvus boreus

    Tony rulez.
    He said he would scrap the taxes and he did, even if it cost the guvment a lot of money.
    He said he would stop the boats and he did, even if it cost the guvment a lot of money.
    He also said he would fix the debt, but this is hard, coz the guvment has a lot less money than it used to have.
    Bloody Labor.

  10. gangey1959

    Carnt tipe. larfin 2 much. Bluddy Layba.

  11. lawrencewinder

    Dear Morrie,
    please call, we have a research position available at IPA headquarters 240 Collin’s St, Melbourne.
    Remuneration will be substantial (see what we got for Timmy….. but Gina’s paying for this one) and somewhat more than we are doling out to the Bolt apprentice.
    yours,
    J. “Le Jongleur” Roscam.
    Ringmaster.

  12. Harquebus

    Tony “Growth is good for everone” Abbott will not stop his mad pursuit until our environment is completely destroyed and we are all dead. Yeah Moneyweather, he is just great.

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