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In Defence Of Barnaby Joyce!

Here I was all set to write about Donald Trump’s latest moments of brilliance.

You may notice that he talks about children and “there parents”. Ok, in the scheme of things, it’s not such a big deal. However, you would think that as President of the United States, he’d be able to get someone to check what he’s written before he sends it out.

Still, if that were happening, then they’d probably have to point out all his factual errors and misconceptions… Like, for example, the concept that it’s his administration which has lost over thousand children, so criticising the Democrats for it seems a little strange. It would be easier to argue – as some are doing that – it should serve as a deterrent for those trying to get into the country. Come to America and you risk losing your chidren! You know, just the opposite of what do here when we hold children on Nauru indefinitely, keeping them with their parents until death do them part.

But my comments on Trump and his on again/off again soap opera with Kim Jong Un will have to be put on hold for a more pressing matter:

The defence of Barnaby Joyce!

It seems that everyone wants to get stuck into poor Barnaby at the moment. Even his colleagues are shaking their heads and telling the media that he’s lost all judgement.

Granted, taking $150,000 for an interview after asking the media all to back off because they’re breaching your privacy does seem a little hypocritical. And one could also suggest that it shows a certain propensity to sell your soul if the price is right. Yes, it’s true that it does make Mr Joyce look as though money is more important to him than a concern for the effect on his wife and daughters. And, yes it is hard to argue that his wife is in no position to complain given she’s the one who tossed him out just because he’d possibly fathered a child with another woman. Or that his daughters have no right to complain because… well, they’re girls and anyway, it’s really a matter for the grown-ups.

Now I know this may not be a popular view, but I think that it’s only fair to point out what everyone seems to be overlooking: Being hypocritical and valuing the dollar above everything are precisely the qualities that got him elected as Deputy PM, so why should he change just because he’s now a lowly backbencher?

Some people are even criticising the decision to put the money from the interview into trust for young Sebastian and suggesting that he’s only doing that to alleviate criticism.

What poppycock!

Clearly, if the money weren’t put into trust for his son, then it would be part of his assets when the divorce settlement is made and he’d have to share it with his ex-wife…

At least I imagine that’s the reason for putting it in trust…

I guess it would be a good idea to check my facts before I start shooting off my mouth.

I mean, it’s not like I’m US President or anything.

P.S. In the interests of clarity, the image is not one of Barnaby holding his new son.


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  1. Peter F

    The picture tells of the moment that the good man realised the warm and fuzzy feeling running down his legs was NOT his.

  2. paul walter

    Mr Bojangles. A bit bankrupt crass, like Lambie’s replacement joining the fascists. Kardashian. The likes of Morrison and Trump have set undreamed of new lows for the rest, new depths to plumb.

  3. Kampbell

    Thanks, good column.

  4. Glenn Barry

    Perhaps Malcolm’s maljudgement is infectious and they all natively act like arrogant asses

  5. Kaye Lee

    I had never seen the show on 7 that Barnaby is appearing on so I had a quick look on Sunday night when they had Jackie Lambie on. The only interview part was about what she wants in a man before they sent her off on a cringeworthy version of bachelorette. We got to watch Jackie trawling through Tinder and going on dates with strangers. If that was an indication of what this program is like, I would suggest anti-emetics for anyone who chooses to encourage this sort of behaviour by watching the fiasco.

    To Barnaby’s ex and his daughters, you have my sincerest sympathy in having to put up with this unfeeling, self-serving, hedonistic adulterer. Take him for every penny.

  6. Josephus

    Yes Kaye, cannot understand why any woman would have had him. Or why Lambie chose to forfeit the mitigated admiration some had previously felt for her. Perhaps wifie will speak out after taking hubby to the cleaners. Yawn.
    More to the point: subject all candidates for an MP job to both probity and IQ tests

  7. Kaye Lee

    And breathalysers before entering the chamber and random urine tests for drugs. It’s for their own good. Those that have a drug or alcohol problem could have their salaries withheld and they could be given a card to live on that can only be used to buy certain things. In order to further help them, we must enforce workplace safety protocols by removing all alcohol from the premises.

    (Some Liberals have suggested offering conversion therapy for same-sex attracted politicians – there is no such thing as too far with this crowd)

    I am wondering if the new foreign interference laws extend to the Vatican and the White House?

  8. Zathras

    The irony is that on one hand Joyce wants to be open with the public about this matter, yet Freedom of Information requests about travel expenses have been denied to the Sydney Morning Herald on the basis that they would “generate public discussion, including on social media”.

    Requests were likewise denied to the West Australian newspaper because it could be “endangering the life or physical safety” of the staff involved.

    So which is it – other than a blatant grab for some easy cash, knowing his political career is finished?

    He could always sell off that suspect land-holding – the one he promised to do 5 years ago.

  9. Vikingduk

    Ok, Rossleigh, if it isn’t the new kid, is it possibly a new love interest? Will this be the relevation that baarnaby and his tart are embarking on a mixed race threesome?

  10. helvityni

    Let go of that sweet Alpaca cria, she/he doesn’t want to be handled by you, Barnaby, it looks frightened….Look after your own off-spring.

  11. Frank Smith


    Lower and lower than a snake goes the Member for New England. Looks like the Beetrooter is throwing his partner under the bus again. I seem to recall he also did this in the midst of the furore a few months back by raising the prospect that the child may not be his. I agree it is hard to find words to describe such a despicable prick. Natalie and the girls are well rid of this posturing hypocrite and may they fleece him of everything – they deserve it!

  12. paul walter

    Yes, what a waste. Jackie Lambie for the scum that replaced her.

    Well aware of her flaws but there is still a quantum difference between her and the slime who took her Senate place, including the High Court.

  13. robyn

    Self Serving & going after the bucks well Channel 7 I wont be watching your show. This guy deserves everything that is dish out to him, after what he has done to his wife & kids .

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