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Gillian Triggs’ Apology to the Liberal Party

Ok, some in the Liberal Party have suggested that Gillian Trigg’s should apologise for some of her comments over the past few months. Of course, she’s a busy woman and probably doesn’t have the time to write a formal apology and to simply rush one off may make her sound a little insincere, so I thought I’d write one on her behalf which she’s free to use so that the Liberals understand that she sees the error of her ways and won’ keep suggesting that it’s inappropriate for anyone being paid from taxpayer funds to find fault with anyone connected with the government. After all, this must have been the logic when Peta Credlin escaped her drink driving charge without so much as a stern warning from the judge let alone a fine or a conviction with the magistrate noting that she’d pleaded guilty so there was no need for a conviction to be recorded because she had a clean driving record having never had a conviction recorded. And thanks to the due process of the law, she still has a clean driving record, so should she front the court on another driving charge, she can stil plead guilty and ask for her previous lack of conviction to be taken into account when not recording a conviction.

But onto Ms Trigg’s apology.

Dear Prime Minister and Members of the Government,

As some of you are aware, I have recently been reported as saying one or two things that may have been considered to be critical of the actions that have been taken in relation to asylum seekers, and while it could be argued that theses criticisms could be levelled at both major parties, I realise that this is not what was meant when some suggested that I was adopting an unacceptable “partisan” position. It wasn’t that I was aligning myself with the Labor Party against you, it was that I was aligning myself with those foreigners in detentions centres. As such my actions were bordering on treason, and I’d like to thank the members of the public who were kind enough to alert me to this before I overstepped the mark and found ASIO breaking down my door at 3am to ask me if my papers were in order and whether I could recite all the words to the national anthem.

While I understand that you feel that my position is “untenable”, I should like to continue in my position at the Human Rights Commission. I do understand that this will be on the proviso that I never criticise any actions of the government but restrict myself to praising George Brandis’s choice of poetry, or telling the country that if there was ever a man that I’d trust to make a decision without having to resort to evidence, then Peter Dutton’s that man, because – as an ex-policeman – he surely knows how tricky things can get when you go to court and how many times simply charging someone with being in possession of indigenous features wasn’t enough to secure a conviction, and, of course, arguing that you simply had a gut feeling that this person was about to commit a crime allowed those defence lawyers to make those technical legal arguments about a “lack of evidence”.

If you allow me to continue, then I will do so under the proviso that all my statements will be checked by the Prime Minister’s office before being made public, because as some of your back-bench have pointed out: It’s the Human RIGHT’s Commission, not the Human LEFT Commission, and as such I should be pointing out such things as how unflattering Julia Gillard’s clothes were rather than concerning myself with what’s happening on overseas islands like Nauru and Manus.

And thanks to the explanations from some of your backbenchers, I now understand how allowing gay people to marry is a terrible breach of the rights of bigots.

So with these undertakings, I hope that we can move forward and put the past behind us with a spirit of cooperation. Just release Australia now that I’ve made these undertakings. You promised you wouldn’t harm her if I did. I love her and I want her back safely. Please, you promised…

 

Mmm!

Nah, now it’s just silly…

As if Gillian Triggs’d be gullible enough to believe anything these guys said.

* * *

P.S. I wrote about a book called “Spy The Lie” a while ago, and without going through the whole thing, one of the interesting bits was that people often avoid a direct denial but say something which sounds like they’re denying but isn’t actually a denial. For example, when asked if they stole the money, they’ll tell you that they’re a great bloke and stealing money is a crime. I mention this in relation to Christopher Pyne’s “denial” that he was the leaker:

“I don’t believe you should be in a cabinet if you are then going to go outside of the cabinet and leak about it. I think that is the worst thing you could possibly do.”

He then went on to say that one shouldn’t assume that it was one of the six named ministers.

But you may notice that there’s no actual “It wasn’t me!” statement in any of that. All he said was that if you leak you shouldn’t be in cabinet, and we all know that young Christopher shouldn’t be in cabinet, so that’s almost an honest statement.

Perhaps he said more somewhere else, but on the basis of that statement, I’d like to ask him point blank, “Were you the one who leaked?”

Although I suspect he’d merely say, “I’m a fixer”.

 

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17 comments

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  1. Bronte ALLAN

    If only this “letter” was true & was sent to ALL these idiot, lying Liberals!

  2. DanDark

    Hail Gillian Triggs, great letter Rossleigh but far to generous a proposal all that time and paper
    All these lot deserve is half a tissue each(save a tree) so they can go sook to someone who cares
    What a lot of sooks, they want a lot of things…

    All we hear from them/LNP is what they want, and if all the little tin soldiers don’t line up like Ms Griggs
    they have a sook,…. sheeesh some real adults in Gov would be something different for us 🙂
    Actually it would be a nice change rather than these pack of dummy spitting tools like Dutton and Tones.

  3. paul walter

    They owe Triggs and the nation an apology, big time, and for so many reasons even Joe Hockey couldn’t count them without his socks off.

  4. Helen Jennings

    rossleigh – nailed it – with humour. I always value and respect your views.

  5. lawrencewinder

    Lovely letter… but none of the mongrels of the ruling rabble would understand it!

  6. Bilal

    Gillian Triggs is an outstanding citizen and should become Australian of the Year. She has stood firm in the face of incredibly vicious bullying and outrageous insults from the most despicable ministry since Charles I strode the stage. Not since Edward Coke and his brave Petition of Right have we had such a courageous public figure prepared to speak in defence of human rights and against the abuses of an arrogant executive.

  7. stephentardrew

    Bewdy mate scored again.

  8. darrel nay

    Quote | “Today, it is infinitely easier to to kill a million people than to control a million people.”- Zbigniew Brzezinski

    “Today, it is infinitely easier to to kill a million people than to control a million people.”- Zbigniew Brzezinski, imperialist/globalist/war-monger, former policy advisor to Obama, CFR and Trilateral Commission founder, lamenting about how the global political awakening is making it increasingly difficult to sedate/exploit and the masses.

  9. mark

    diversity means less white people – so lets promote diversity…wait sounds kind of racist against white people hm

  10. stuffme

    Well, I think we do have a govt of fixers in at the moment. They have fixed everything havent they? The most insane govt ever, yes INSANE!

  11. Möbius Ecko

    How does diversity mean less white people mark? That’s a strange abstraction to make. The whites are still free to procreate and increase their numbers in a racially diverse society but for several reasons don’t. Indeed they are voluntarily reducing their numbers globally by having relationships with other races in increasing numbers, and producing children of increasingly darker skin because of these mixed race relationships.

    Dark races are also increasingly having relationships with lighter skin races including Asians, thus producing children that are lighter skinned.

    As the song goes, one big melting pot.

  12. Michael Taylor

    Mobius, he was just sprouting a load of rubbish. Either that or he is innately racist.

  13. Möbius Ecko

    Well if you want to be racist, the white race has it well within its power to peacefully and non-medically reduce the numbers of darker skinned races by a substantial number.

    It was the white race that became extremely wealthy on the backs of exploitation of other races, most significantly through invasion, the slave trade and oil. If the same white countries that became wealthy by the exploitation of other races now gave those poorer countries reimbursements to make them wealthier, their populations would naturally decrease, as they are for the whites in most white nations.

  14. stephentardrew

    Go away troll.

  15. diannaart

    Top writing as per usual Rossleigh.

    But, especially enjoyed your observation on ‘lying’.

    Chris Pyne a unassailable choice in the art of the spurious. Excellent call, will remain extra vigilant on the Pyne.

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