Headlines come and go, but this one repeats itself with a familiar refrain: “In one week, three Australian women were allegedly killed by men they knew.”
Why?
The figures are staggering. Despite the programmes we instigate and the enormous amounts of money we invest to combat domestic violence, on average one woman is killed by a husband or partner every week.
Should I repeat that? One woman has her life taken from her by a man close to her every week.
Three women were allegedly killed by a man close to them a couple of weeks ago.
“Christine Rakic, Amira Moghnieh, and a woman in the Northern Territory had their lives terminated.”
The people who analyse these things use words that make you think, but it’s hard to get one’s head around it, the why of it seems beyond me.
“The advocates in this area say things like “absolutely horrifying.” Domestic and family violence experts say violence against women is at “epidemic proportions.”
All the statistics combined tell a story that might be called “How they suffer for their femineity.”
Tarang Chawla, an anti-violence advocate, recently told SBS News that.
“At a human level, it is absolutely horrifying.
“It’s horrible that we’ve had to have so many tragedies in such a short space of time for us to really take stock, listen and think about why this is occurring and what we need to do to stop it from happening with such frequency.”
I have heard Chawla speak of his own experience on ABC’s The Drum.
He had lived through a similar experience, losing his sister Nikita in 2015 when she was murdered by her husband in Melbourne. He urged the community to understand the true human cost of particularly men’s violence against women.
“When we talk about these things in the media, we sometimes gloss over the fact that these are real human beings and the tragedy will have lifelong consequences – and that’s the people who are left behind.
“The families of these people will never be the same.”
It has now become a familiar story. One that I have written about myself and in the annals of my own family history, I wonder if my mother may have experienced similar acts of cowardice.
Then I heard that police had raided the homes of almost six hundred male offenders due to the three murders mentioned earlier. The NSW police targeted the state’s most dangerous domestic violence offenders and turned up illegal firearms and guns – and a corn snake (whatever that is).
“The four-day operation dubbed Amarok III resulted in 1107 domestic violence charges being laid against 592 people, who were mostly men, but there were at least two women.”
As I read on, I’m told that 139 men were arrested, and of these, 103 had outstanding warrants for violent offences and were amongst NSW’s most dangerous offenders.
The article went on to say that of those charged, many face other severe offences, including prohibited firearm and weapon possession, drug possession and supply.
From what I have read to this point, I am shocked at the criminal element involved in Domestic Violence. It’s enough to overwhelm one’s emotions.
Am I that naive I ask myself to have not known this?
“Some 139 were amongst NSW’s most dangerous offenders, and 103 had outstanding warrants for violent offences. Some of those charged also face other serious offences, including prohibited firearm and weapon possession, drug possession and supply.
Police seized 22 firearms and 40 prohibited weapons, as well as various types of illicit drugs located with 89 detections.”
An article from The Courier quotes many more facts and figures, saying:
“We know domestic and family violence is one of the most under-reported crime types.”
That I am left in a state of shock would be an understatement.
Reporting for news.com.au, Blake Antrobus says that:
“… specialist teams such as the Domestic Violence High-Risk Offender Teams (DVHROT) were also involved in the operation.”
“The NSW Police Force invests significant resources into responding to domestic and family violence, attending some 139,000 calls for assistance in 2022 – with more than 33,100 of those actual assaults and 17 domestic-related murders.”
What, in God’s name, I ask myself, am I missing here? What if I were to multiply all these facts and figures across the nation? The statistics would be incredible.
They have undoubtedly worsened because of the Covid pandemic and multiplied again due to the economic crisis and cost of living problems. And these figures don’t mention what I shall call the non-criminal cohort. However, I might be corrected on that one.
The next question I ask myself, is what is to be done? In the totality of what I know, I suggest seeing the crisis as a community problem; not just a family one. We should educate ourselves on the subject. Be prepared to report cases of abuse. Enlighten our children about what it means.
What exactly causes men to commit these terrible acts of abuse? What makes us tighten our fists and strike out? Low self-esteem, culture, misogyny, tempestuous or explosive personality, incubus personality, borderline personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder. Anyone with these personality disorders might commit domestic violence when under the influence of drugs.
Our first port of call must be education. To familiarise ourselves with the problem and arm ourselves with all the information we can digest and then speak it.
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Here are some starters:
White Ribbon Australia
10 things Australia can do to prevent violence against women and children
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My thought for the day
If you are looking for the ultimate expression of the purity of love, there is no better place to look than in the sanctity of motherhood.
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