Barbarians to Baronets; Conservative aspirations in Australia.
In several articles of late, and even on one blog-site to which I was once, regretfully, a regular contributor, I have been “corrected” in my terminology of naming many of the LNP and their hangers-on as “middle-class” when, if one can believe ones detractors, I should have used the term; “upper middle-class”, because, you see … many tradies now consider themselves of the middle-classes. And one just couldn’t imagine oneself mixing with such common folk, m’Lord!
Well, suck my wellies and call me Barnaby! A tradie is middle-class now do you mind? In your bleedin’ dreams, Brenton (or whatever your name is!). All this shit about status and class … and here in Oz, FFS! Don’t try to bung on side with this old carpenter. You get your hands dirty with labour, be it hard or soft. You’re on wages, you’re on piece-work … you’re working class. You’re a professional – as in consultative or managerial or ownership/employer you’re middle-class. And that’s ALL you are, be you the local hardware on the corner, or Gina The Hutt. You’re middle-class. Even that dozy dreamer from Point Piper with all the shrewd judgement of a seasoned meth’ addict is just a middle-class schmuck.
All this bullshit of dividing the classes into sub-groups is just some pitiful attempt by some who want to “elevate” their status from little snob to pompous arsehole! There’s a lot of them … usually from some Latin-logo’d private school that was more interested in screwing up the minds and bodies of their charges than delivering a decent education. But that’s another subject. What we are concentrating on here is the exposure of a sinister and foolish direction by the conservative movement in Australia, not necessarily to destroy the unions and suppress the working classes, but rather, it would seem, a convoluted and deluded ambitious path to create a new aristocratic order in Australia. And that, by necessity demands the restructuring of the classes in the nation to the three levels of social order required of the class system:
1) Aristocratic class.
2) Middle class.
3) Working class.
If you are of the working class reading this, you are probably thinking; ”That is absurd!” and of course it is. Of course it is, to you and me it is just crazy! But you think back over the behaviour of those LNP ministers and their behaviour – remember Speaker Slipper and his donning of the old trappings of the position, including the dress-code? – and then there’s the Bishops and the Turnbulls and the Prof’ Flints and that gross Alan Jones! All the bastards in the front bench (except Barnaby … you can’t pin this on Barnaby … except perhaps the Idiot Son!) … and you remember Murdoch, the “dirty digger” … when he was a “digger” who would’ve sold his arse for just a dab of the Royal Parkinson Sword on each shoulder … as it is all he could get was some second rate chit from the Pope … no doubt recalling those halcyon days of the Holy Roman Empire. Keerist! What a panoply of strange fruit! And all of them aspiring to levels far above their station; of a rut full of sewerage! Mind you, I kind of wonder if they are even consciously aware of their movement in the direction of aspiring aristocracy, and are in reality just obeying the age-old subconscious imperative of upward-mobility from barbarian leader to barbarian chief to barbarian king … the need for control and authority the driving force behind their many delusions.
Because if you think back to the days of Malcolm Fraser and the overthrow of the Whitlam government, it was not by democratic means, but rather with the assistance of The Crown intervention, using a set of anachronistic principles in place from a time of regal-aristocratic dominance to “legitimize” the treason – “Dieu et Mon Droit” – with that top-hatted, drunken scut playing the role of My Lord Chancellor to the LNP rodents scurrying around the back door of Yarralumla! God help us all. We shoulda laid out the rat-poison for the lot!
And then to The Mad Monk; Abbott bestowing knighthood upon the Consort Royal of the Queen of bleedin’, bloody England do-you-eff-ing-mind! And on Australia Day to boot! Squeeze his nuts and tell ‘im he’s dreamin’. Can there be an any more absurd gathering of dupes and mongrels throughout the entire catalogue of human history – and I include Caligula and cl’-cl’-Claudius in that little collection – than the LNP? Because if Abbott didn’t do that dirty little deed because he thought he was in a position almost equal to the Regal Monarch of his and Robert Menzies “Motherland” then I’ll go “eck!”
And this conservative delusion of grandeur is being absorbed into the general acceptance of society, where with the advent of “reality TV” and many film and video media portraying a fantasy of rags to riches or poverty to prince/princess, we get a blurring of reality where many people who are surviving on barely a living wage begin to flatter themselves as part of a bigger dynasty of pomp and circumstance … a situation I would think is to the benefit of the conservative movement’s voting advantage, having all these wannabes doffing the cap and tugging the fore-lock to the Laird of the Manor: ”Vote 1 – LNP”.
Time for a reality check, my little chickadees. All those slavey f#ckers out there in the Oz sunshine better get a grip on who they really are and not who they think they are and to what class they belong and join up to your local union, because before too much time has passed, we are going to get a serve of their Lordship’s shit on a platter with low wages, off-shored jobs, on-shored 457 visa $4 @ hour workers and a complete cut in social services so we can all gather in the village hall as serfs in the feudal kingdom of the “born to rule” class to receive the next serve of shit-sandwiches. And if you think that’s the end of it, think again, for there’s still around 75 more items on the little IPA wish-list circulating around LNP headquarters and on the wall of Twiggy and Gina’s and Rupert’s creatures offices. And if any of us think that we are going to get special consideration because we have self-elevated ourselves from working-stiff to middle-class stiff, then … well … STIFF!
You can guarantee those by-products of Delhi-belly in the conservative movement are not looking for too many fellow travelers in their Broughams and carriages, after all, there’s only so many times one has the inclination to wave one’s wrist in appreciation of the masses gathered to worship. For the rest, one feels compelled, when one meets such on the pavement, to drop a handy fiver or such into their begging bowl, because, y’see, t’s the kind of bloke you are.
Nope, you can hope or demand all you like, but there is only two classes of society in Australia: working-class and middle-class. And as for the rest, you’re just whistling into the wind, me old china. Whistling into the wind …