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A “Polite Letter” To Malcolm Turnbull!

Dear Mr Turnbull

We have received information from the Australian Tax Office about your employment income. Apparently you have been paid as Prime Minister when it is clear that you have been paying no attention to the mess your government is creating.

What You Need To Do
1. Please check what ridiculous things your MPs have been saying lately
2. Confirm that we are correct in that your only interest in being PM is to swan around saying, “I’m Prime Minister, what are you?”

You can do this by going to a Centrelink office and waiting in line as apparently there’s only a ten minute wait before someone will tell you that you need to go online because they don’t deal with actual people at Centrelink. You can login at the myGov.au website, which takes no time at all because it’s now 2017 and thanks to the Liberals all premises have access to high speed Internet.

What You Need To Know
If you do not respond, you will be charged with fraud where the court case should go something like this:

Prosecution: We think that this man has defrauded us and claimed money that he’s not entitled to.
Judge: Do you have any proof?
Prosecution: No, but he can’t prove that he didn’t!
Judge: What does the defence have to say?
Defence: I thought the obligation was on the prosecution to prove guilt, not the other way around.
Judge: Yes, I thought so too, but not when we enter the political world.
Defence: Oh, in that case, the defence – like the PM – rests.

More Information

If you are found to be merely pretending to be PM you may be subject to a 10% penalty as well as being required to pay back all your salary. However, this may be preferable to actually admitting you had any part in this shambles of a government. Certainly, history will judge you less harshly if you can just pay us to remove all references to you as Coalition leader.

Should you not receive this letter, it’s your fault for not reading the AIMN. However, that is no excuse and you can expect to be visited by a debt collector any day now. Apparently a guy called Tony isn’t doing much and he said he’d be happy to pay you a visit.

Yours sincerely,

Director, Earned Income
Customer Compliance

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10 comments

  1. Jagger

    The “lucky country” brought to its knees by the Abbott/Turnball’s bunch of miscreants.

  2. king1394

    I recently received one of Centrelink’s ‘polite’ letters. The heading was blunt: ‘Your Newstart payment has been suspended’ Such an announcement is always perturbing, and when one has been getting by somehow for a few years one does not have a lot of resources to fall back on. After recovering from a mild heart attack I found the reason for this announcement:’ ‘This is because you are now receiving an Aged Pension …’

  3. paulwalter

    The brutalism and clumsiness..it is like watching the discombobulated peripatations of the Frankenstein Monster.

  4. Jaquix

    King1394 – dont relax, age pensioners are the next target our lily livered, not so squeaky clean Coalition politicians.are going to attack. This will keep them busy so they wont have time to look at top level and corporate tax avoiders, political organisations and church-run businesses masquarading as charities, or their own “entitlements” ripoff scheme.

  5. Jennifer Meyer-Smith

    Spot on, Rossleigh.

  6. Henry Rodrigues

    The ‘missing-in-action’ PM. No big loss, because he’s as useless as tits on a bull though the bull might object to the tie-in with this gutless wimp. Now this morning we had the ‘throat-slitter’ Ciobo defending pollies attending sports fixtures at tax payers expense. Its enough to make people want to slit his throat.

  7. Gary Michael

    The LNP are so lame at being in government that they will implode.

  8. Marion June Poke

    @Gary Michael.. We wish.. and the sooner the better..

  9. Deidre

    Is King Truffles in his offshore counting house counting his tax avoided money?

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