By Kyran O’Dwyer
Dear Prime Minister.
Bearing in mind it’s the ‘silly season’, I thought I would drop you a quick note of sympathy.
Whilst I understand you are no more a prime minister than I am the Queen of Sheba, I must ask a question. At what time does your impotence to effect change outweigh your privilege of being referred to as Prime Minister?
Just have a look at your last few days. The ‘new’ Minister of Health is pursuing the history of her predecessor, in terms of property acquisition. She is likely to be adjudged the next ‘worst health minister’ in terms of performance and one of the upcoming ministers in terms of property owned. Just like her predecessor.
I can only sympathise with you. These incompetents are accumulating wealth by stealth. You had to accumulate yours through privilege. And your undeniable brilliance, of course. Whilst the sources of the accumulation of wealth are slightly different, one can’t help but note that none of the accumulation was due to ability. It’s a tribute to all of you that your disability of wealth and privilege is carried so well.
Having pissed in your pathetic pocket for three paragraphs, I thought that might ‘entitle’ me to ask a few questions about this ‘porter’ bloke. Apparently that’s his name. Defined as “a person employed to carry luggage and other loads” … it’s apparently his nature, as well.
Did you know he was with the WA government before you ‘inherited’ him? I know you have been busy. You may have missed that in your avoidance of ‘spot fires’. Funnily enough, he was both AG and Treasurer of the wonderful state of Western Australia. There seems to be some question as to his ability as Treasurer. According to his ‘Register of Members’ Interests, he and his wife only own two properties. He has, by many accounts, left the state bankrupt. Notwithstanding that scummo can’t bankrupt Australia, how is it that porter is touted as either scummo’s replacement, or yours?
It beggars belief.
At least porter has two properties. By way of recollection, scummo only has one. All are subject to mortgage. Our treasurer and our potential treasurer (or Prime Minister) appear to be worse with money than health ministers. How could you possibly expect either of them to treasure anything else than your faux entitlement?
I don’t know porter’s salary. I know he grabbed at least $400k in expenses between Jan 1 and June 30, 2015, in addition to his salary. How can he possibly have mortgages? It’s not like he pays his own expenses, is it?
Whilst I understand porter ‘changed the rules’ (without reference to parliament) in July, 2016, he did not enunciate the change until his address to the NPC in September. Remember that?
Here’s the thing. This ‘thing’, like most of your ministry, is a nonsense. As a previous state AG he should know about Sect 60 of the Trade Practices Act. That’s the overarching national debt collection guideline, supervised by the ACCC and ASIC. If he doesn’t, you really should dispense of the porter’s services. Debt collectors, as he should know, are regulated by state authoritys.
Part of the ACCC guidelines state, categorically, that you cannot issue a ‘letter of demand’ that replicates a ‘legal document’. Whilst the inclusion of the AFP on the letterhead implies it is a legal document, your government is exempt from any such legislation. The problem is that they send a debt collector after you if you don’t respond to the letter.
Dunn & Bradstreet are the second largest ‘credit reporting agency’, just behind Veda, in Australia. Do you think, Mr P M, for a second, that the porter knows what luggage he is bearing? Did he sign a waiver under the Privacy Act that allows D&B to publish unfounded allegations?
With ‘Probe’, do you think, for a second, Mr P M, that he wasn’t aware that that group of companies are the process servers, by way of contract, to the ATO?
With regard to ARL, do you think, for a second, Mr P M , he was unaware that they were the process servers, by way of contract, prior to ‘Probe’, for the ATO?
Whilst us ‘serf’s’ need to understand your massive intellect, wealth, ability, courage, conviction, et cetera, can I ask a simple question?
We have seen your wealth. We have seen your intellect. We have seen your ability.
Capacities you parade on a regular cycle.
Will we ever see the courage of your convictions?
Please, pass your baggage to the porter. Let us be done with your nonsense.
Have a wonderful New Year. If you no longer want to take a piss, just get off the pot.
It’s not like you need the money. If you get off quick enough, your brilliant ‘career’ can be salvaged by your abdication. Let the porter carry your baggage. It worked for one of your predecessors, Little Johnnie. His porter was tiny.
Have a wonderful New Year. As ‘leader’ of the country you have denied most or your constituents any prospect of a new year. And deprived them of any aspiration for a new year.
Rest assured, you are a ‘grate’ man.
Enjoy your legacy. Remember, there are no pockets in a shroud.